Sorry ladies. Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake are finally getting ready to say, "I do" — this summer, to be exact, according to People. This might be the most highly anticipated summer shindig of 2012 (at least when it comes to paparazzi), but Biel and Timberlake (Bimberlake? Tiel? We'll quit while we're ahead) still have to compete for the spot of best celebrity summer wedding ever. Or should we say most ridiculously extravagant celebrity wedding ever? Will they top the list?
Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo tied the knot on July 15, 2011 — but it wasn't just any ceremony. They actually got married on a private island owned by their friend Sir Richard Branson. Private jets as party favors? Lachey and Minnillo were not the only ones to have their festivities in a tropical paradise. After a four-year engagement, Megan Fox finally became Brian Austin Green's wife on June 24, 2012. They had a private ceremony at the Four Seasons Resort on the beautiful Big Island of Hawaii, far away from angry robots that love exploding things. And, no, we're not talking about famous Fox foe Michael Bay. Everyone thought Kim Kardashian had found her prince charming when she married Kris Humphries on August 20, 2011 in Montecito, Calif. — but fairy tales don't always have a happy ending. Despite the fact that Kardashian filed for divorce just 72 days after the couple wed, she always has E!'s two-part wedding extravaganza to remind her of Humphries. And countless tabloid covers. And her lawyers.
Sherri Shepherd married Lamar Sally on Aug. 13, 2011 in Chicago, Ill. And the lucky lady had four celebrities in her bridal party: Her The View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck, comedian Niecy Nash, and actresses Yvette Nicole Brown and Kym Whitley. She must have had one wild Bachelorette party. And now for the most adorable: Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi said their vows on Aug. 16, 2008. There ceremony was simple — only 19 guests! What would Hollywood think?! — and located in the most intimate of settings: Their own home in California. Will Biel and Timberlake's day beat out all of these celebrity summer weddings? [People] More: Celebrities Share Their Most Outlandish Fan Experiences Channing Tatum and 7 Other Sexy, Funny Stars
A billionaire TV producer (Robert Mammone) has a great idea for a reality show that he wants to put on the Internet and his goal is to beat the 40 million Super Bowl audience. He has compiled a crack team of young hip and immoral tech geeks directed by Goldman (Rick Hoffman) and puts cameras throughout a remote island where former prisoners are going to kill each other while audiences watch after shelling out the pay-per-view fee. The location is done on a remote secret island and the death row prisoners are bought from prisons around the world with the promise that the survivor gets to walk free. Among the contestants are a rogue Aussie named McStarley (Vinnie Jones) a martial arts expert (Masa Yamaguchi) a husband-and-wife team (Manu Bennett and Dasi Ruz) a monstrous killer who doesn't do much more than grunt (Nathan Jones) and others known only as The Italian The German and other monikers quickly forgotten. Enter the sole American Jack Conrad (Steve Austin) who's in a South American prison for some obscure reason and is recognized on TV by his wife (Madeleine West) who tries to save him. However it looks like Conrad is pretty good at helping himself. Don't expect the acting to be much more evolved than what could be seen among the World Wrestling Entertainment superstars especially since many of them were plucked from the ring to star in this morality tale. But Austin (who had in a strong cameo in Adam Sandler's Longest Yard) proves he has a sense of humor as well as strength. Vinnie Jones is ridiculously over-the-top as the Aussie who's the hand-picked winner of this game shown setting up alliances Survivor style only to turn on them later. The supporting cast are refreshingly entertaining but one-note caricatures both in the contest and running the contest. It's obvious that they aren't going to be around long but the actors do milk their tiny roles for every bit of attention they can get. Rick Hoffman as the brilliant camera mastermind of the project is both whiny sniveling and mean-spirited so when he joins some of the rest of the crew and suddenly develops a backbone and a conscience he ends up stealing the movie with his acerbic humor. But it's the understated American hero Conrad who holds a mirror up to the people who like to watch this stuff. Director Scott Wiper who co-wrote this story has also acted in similar movies like this (A Better Way to Die). It’s obvious he knows what he’s doing with The Condemned and develops a sense of voyeuristic angst like those of us who can't keep our eyes off a train wreck. Like the darkly subversive Belgian film Man Bites Dog the camera crew remains safely distant and remote until the reality directly involves them. Then the crew wonders "What the hell are we doing?" while the audience might be thinking "What the hell are we watching?" Much like Series 7: The Contenders Rollerball and other movies which show a dark and bloody near future this kind of reality doesn't seem too far away and maybe proves that movies which provide this type of gladiator spectacle target a certain segment of the human population who need to blow off steam.