After sitting through the 2013 Oscars ceremony, which was long enough for Daniel Day-Lewis to grow back his Lincoln beard before the credits rolled, it was up to the evening's Oscars after-parties to make the night interesting. Unfortunately, most of us weren't lucky enough to stroll into the exclusive soirees, so we'll just have to live vicariously through the legions of candid snapshots coming out of the fetes. That also means we'll probably never know the actual words being shared between the Oscar winners and losers, the fame-mongers and superstars, the Anne Hathaways and the Jennifer Lawrences.
Lucky for you, we've got a pretty good idea of what was probably (see: in our dreams) being said while the brightest stars in Tinsel Town sipped on cocktails and champagne after the curtains closed on the Academy's big night. (What can we say? We know our A-listers better than we know most of our own friends and relatives.)
GALLERY: Oscar Parties 2013: What Were Anne Hathaway and Elton John Really Saying (In Our Dreams)?
Follow Kelsea on Twitter @KelseaStahler
[Photo Credit: Jeff Vespa/VF13/WireImage]
Oscars 2013 Special Coverage
Oscars 2013 Best Dressed: PICS!
• Anne Hathaway: Oscar’s Worst Dressed?• Seth MacFarlane’s Opening: How’d He Do?• Adele’s Performance Gets Mixed Reviews• 15 Oscar-Winning Nude Scenes• What Happened to Renee Zellweger's Face?• Oscars 2013: The Full Winners List• Why Kristen Stewart Was on Crutches
From Our Partners:25 Most Scandalous Celeb Twitpics (Vh1)33 Child Stars: Where Are They Now? (Celebuzz)
It was all about that jazz at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles tonight, as the Screen Actors Guild handed out its top honors in its annual ceremony. Miramax's musical spectacular Chicago emerged as the big winner, snagging the best cast performance award.
The musical's Renee Zellweger won best actress honors for her kewpie-doll murderess Roxie Hart, and Catherine Zeta-Jones was named best supporting actress for her vixen Velma Kelly. The very pregnant Zeta-Jones made it up to the podium and declared, "If I wasn't pregnant, I'd do it all over again!"
Of course, Zeta-Jones' chances may have been further enhanced by the absence of Meryl Streep's name on the list. In a rather embarrassing snafu, Sony Pictures submitted her name to SAG in the best actress category for her role in Adaptation rather than in the supporting category. Since Paramount Pictures had also submitted Streep's performance in The Hours for best actress honors, many felt the two cancelled one another out and cost her any nomination at all.
Streep still got honors from several of the winners, however, including Edie Falco, who won best actress in a drama series for her work in The Sopranos. As she came on stage, she took a deep breath, saying, "I just locked eyes with Meryl Streep--I need to collect myself for a moment."
Another admirer was Will & Grace's Megan Mullally, who, after winning the award for best actress in a comedy series, quipped "I am so busted! I was trying to tell Meryl Streep that I love her and I tripped on the stairs!"
Other film winners included Daniel Day-Lewis, who picked up the award for best actor for his performance as Bill the Butcher in Gangs of New York, and Christopher Walken, who won the award for best supporting actor for his turn as Frank Abagnale Sr. in Catch Me If You Can. The slightly disoriented Walken seemed a little surprised at his win, but joked, "We are all family and I hope we all work together--soon."
The evening's best acceptance speeches, however, belonged to the winners in the television categories, including James Gandolfini, who took home the best actor in drama award for his mob boss on The Sopranos. The burly actor, looking even more menacing with a full beard, made light of his recent contractual woes with HBO. "It's a great place to work!…Enjoy it while it's happening 'cause it can get weird later on," referring to the recent lawsuit he has filed against the cable channel for breach of contract.
The cast of Everybody Loves Raymond had a few things to say about Gandolfini's troubles as well. As they headed up on stage after winning the best TV comedy series ensemble, Ray Romano handed the mike over to co-star Brad Garrett, claiming "[Brad] never gets enough lines." Without missing a beat, Garrett admitted, "This is an exciting time for me because I'm going to be auditioning for the lead in The Sopranos next week." Then turning to his co-stars, he nervously asked, "Is [Gandolfini] laughing?…This is why they never let me talk."
Sean Hayes, who won for best actor in a comedy series for Will & Grace, hammed it up. "I'm completely shocked. I have nothing prepared. But now I can get these," lifting up his shirt to show markings for plastic surgery on his stomach. "They said I'd have six-packs in no time." All joking aside, Hayes got a little emotional, thanking his co-stars. "I wasn't that long ago I couldn't pay my rent. And now I can pay all of you guys' rent. Thank you."
Other television wins included HBO's Six Feet Under for best TV drama series ensemble,
William H. Macy for best actor in a TV movie/miniseries for TNT's Door to Door and Stockard Channing for best actress in a TV movie/miniseries for The Matthew Shepherd Story.
Tough guy Clint Eastwood received SAG's lifetime achievement award and was introduced by Romano, who freely admitted he thought it was a little odd that he was chosen as the person to introduce Eastwood, even though they "went way back."
Here's the complete list of nominees and winners:
Adrien Brody, The Pianist
Nicolas Cage, Adaptation
Daniel Day-Lewis, Gangs of New York--Winner!
Richard Gere, Chicago
Jack Nicholson, About Schmidt
Salma Hayek, Frida
Nicole Kidman, The Hours
Diane Lane, Unfaithful
Julianne Moore, Far From Heaven
Renee Zellweger, Chicago--Winner!
Chris Cooper, Adaptation
Ed Harris, The Hours
Alfred Molina, Frida
Dennis Quaid, Far From Heaven
Christopher Walken, Catch Me If You Can--Winner!
Kathy Bates, About Schmidt
Julianne Moore, The Hours
Michelle Pfeiffer, White Oleander
Queen Latifah, Chicago
Catherine Zeta-Jones, Chicago--Winner!
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
My Big Fat Greek Wedding
Actor in a TV Movie or Miniseries
Albert Finney, The Gathering Storm, HBO
Brad Garrett, Gleason, CBS
Sean Hayes, Martin & Lewis, CBS
William H. Macy, Door to Door, TNT--Winner!
John Turturro, Monday Night Mayhem, TNT
Actress in a TV Movie or Miniseries
Kathy Bates, My Sister's Keeper, CBS
Stockard Channing, The Matthew Shepard Story, NBC--Winner!
Helen Mirren, Door to Door, TNT
Vanessa Redgrave, The Gathering Storm, HBO
Uma Thurman, Hysterical Blindness, HBO
Actor in a Drama Series
Michael Chiklis, The Shield, FX
James Gandolfini, The Sopranos, HBO--Winner!
Martin Sheen, The West Wing, NBC
Kiefer Sutherland, 24, Fox
Treat Williams, Everwood, WB
Actress in a Drama Series
Lorraine Bracco, The Sopranos, HBO
Amy Brenneman, Judging Amy, CBS
Edie Falco, The Sopranos, HBO--Winner!
Allison Janney, The West Wing, NBC
Lily Tomlin, The West Wing, NBC
Actor in a Comedy Series
Sean Hayes, Will & Grace, NBC--Winner!
Matt LeBlanc, Friends, NBC
Bernie Mac, The Bernie Mac Show, Fox
Ray Romano, Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS
Tony Shalhoub, Monk, USA
Actress in a Comedy Series
Jennifer Aniston, Friends, NBC
Kim Cattrall, Sex and the City, HBO
Patricia Heaton, Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS
Jane Kaczmarek, Malcolm in the Middle, Fox
Megan Mullally, Will & Grace, NBC--Winner!
Ensemble in a Drama Series
CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, CBS
Six Feet Under, HBO--Winner!
The Sopranos, HBO
The West Wing, NBC
Ensemble in a Comedy Series
Everybody Loves Raymond, CBS--Winner!
Sex and the City, HBO
Will & Grace, NBC