We had grown weary of Smallville, stopped laughing at That ‘70s Show, and couldn’t stomach even the thought of a third go-‘round for The Simple Life. By the autumn of 2004, we had no place to turn but to the mysterious island series that ABC ads had been pimping like crazy. Following our national love of sci-fi, of Survivor, of that bespectacled fella who made Felicity (ah, times were different then), we flocked to Lost, ill-prepared for the slew of questions, deficit of answers, and legion of unforgettable characters we'd meet over the course of the next six seasons. In honor of the 10-year anniversary of the dawn of America's last true pop culture addiction, we've decided to rank those characters — to celebrate the Oceanic Six, bemoan the Flight 815 tail section, and kind of sigh in bored confusion over the folks at the Dharma Initiative.
A quick qualifier: we aren't, and couldn't with any qualitative legitimacy, ranking all of the characters on Lost. We're ignoring the nearly anonymous Others, the one-line flashback extras, and that guy who was sucked into the jet propeller in the first episode. Remember him? I think his name was Gary. He's not on the list.
76. MILES STRAUMEThe most convoluted and out-of-place construct that Lost ever managed, which is saying something. Why can he speak to the dead? Who cares if he’s Dr. Chang’s son? Why did anyone think this character was a good idea?
75. SHANNONLess of a problem with the mythology than simply an annoying, corrosive onscreen presence.
74. KEAMY, FROM THE BOATUgh, this guy. This guy and his crew cut.
73. JACK’S NONEXISTENT SONDavid Shephard’s one saving grace is that he doesn’t actually exist. Three cheers for flash-sideways nullification!
72. LENNONIs… is his name actually Lennon? Or do they just call him that because he looks exactly like Lennon? And why, pray tell, does he look exactly like Lennon?
71. RICHARDThe irritation of the wholly useless Richard is maximized by the knowledge that he’ll be around forever.
70. ANNA LUCIAAnna Lucia acts as the epitome of everything that was wrong with the tail section chapter in maintaining the concrete belief that she is in any way a viable substitute for the main cast’s screen time.
69. GOODWINUgh, this guy. This guy and his wisps.
68. NIKKI AND PAOLONo explanation necessary for why Nikki and Paolo falls towards the bad end of the list, but a few extra points for the sadistic treat that was their final bow.
67. THE MOTHER“Hey guys, tonight’s episode of Lost has Allison Janney! From The West Wing! I love her! I bet they give her something cool and funny and totally pertinent to the contemporary storyline to do!”
66. ELOISE HAWKINGOne Farraday was more than enough, guys.
65. ILANAI have to be honest, I barely remember who this is.
64. DOGENDogen’s scenes were just one of many late series constructs that made us sigh wistfully and recount on the good old days when this show was about people trapped on an island.
63. MINKOWSKILadies and gentlemen, Fisher Stevens.
62. EMMA AND ZACKYou can really lump all the unaccounted for Lost children in one cloying bullet point: these two, the Kwon baby, Desmond and Penny’s kid, the deity twins, Aaron. They all just caused a whole mess of trouble, didn’t they?
61. LIBBY “What if — get this — what if we gave her a romance with a fan-favorite, and then closed an episode with a shocking stinger that revealed she used to be in a mental institution?“Sounds great! Then what?”“No, that’s about it.”
NEXT: 60 - 41
60. CHARLIE’S BROTHER“You all, everybody!” Ha. Remember that?
59. ABADDONEh, it’s Lance Reddick doing Lance Reddick, just without any of the interesting we were used to seeing.
58. JACK’S EX-WIFEHas anyone made a mash-up interweaving Julie Bowen’s Lost scenes with clips from Modern Family? I can’t imagine that anyone would have felt impelled to do so. And I certainly don’t feel impelled to check.
57. HORACE GOODSPEEDGoodspeed might have scored higher were not for his portrayer’s particularly creepy real life romantic exploits. Ech.
56. ALEX, ROUSSEAU’S DAUGHTERAw, she was okay.
55. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALTPuberty ruins everything. Self-esteem, probing storylines…
54. RYAN PRICE AND HIS TEN BEST MENI’d like to see a separate series about these guys. Or at least a few minutes of the pilot of one.
53. THE MAN IN BLACKHe really couldn’t have just talked things out with brother Jay?
52. ALDO, FROM THE TEMPLELadies and gentlemen, Mac.
51. THE PICKETTSNever was a story of more woe than this of… Colleen… and… Danny.
50. RADZINSKYHeh, this guy. This guy and his combover.
49. KATE’S BOYFRIENDWell this one just makes me sad.
48. SUN’S DADDitto. What a jerk.
47. HURLEY’S IMAGINARY FRIENDI never entirely knew what to make of Hurley’s bout of delusional psychosis… but I’m a sucker for that thing where it looks like someone is taking a normal photograph, and then that very photograph amounts as evidence of something spooky going on.
46. CASSIDYHell hath no fury like a stunt cast actress scorn.
45. INMANScratch the Ryan Price and His Ten Best Men pitch. I want to see Inman slowly lose his noodle.
44. DANIEL FARRADAYSomewhere between endearingly nuanced and gratingly overacty, there lies Jeremy Davis’ performance.
43. JULIETFor a late addition central character, Juliet never really achieved genuine interesting-on-her-own-accord status.
42. THE PILOTSure, he died within moments of being introduced, but he single-handedly set the tone and stakes for the entire first season. Way to go, Sean Blumberg.
41. LEONARDFour. Eight. Fifteen. Sixteen. Twenty-three. Forty-two. Repeat.
NEXT: 40 - 21
40. TOM FRIENDLYThe reveal that he was gay helped warm us up to Tom just a bit, but I always wanted to know more about this prominent Other.
39. NAOMII feel as though I remember Naomi being far more interesting than she genuinely was. Could just be the chutzpah.
38. DR. PIERRE CHANGSmart men make bad dads, so says Lost.
37. JACOBFor an omnipotent deity, Jacob’s kind of a dingus.
36. FROGURTOr “Neil.”
35. CHARLES WIDMOREA bit too faceless to be an effective super villain, but could teach a master class in menacing accentry.
34. BRAM, THE OTHERAnd next to Stoker, probably the best Bram in pop culture.
33. PHIL, THE OTHERAw, this guy. This guy and his widow’s peak.
32. KATE’S DADGood dad alert! We’ve got an actual good dad on Lost people!
31. MR. EKOIf only you didn’t hate Hawaii so much, Adewale, maybe your character would have gotten an appropriate send-off.
30. CLAIRESane Claire? Fantastic. Crazy Claire? Abysmal. They average out to pretty good.
29. MIKHAILIs it just me, or are eye-patches unconditionally cool?
28. ROGER WORKMANThe pressures of fatherhood, the anchor of alcoholism, the monumental stresses of the DHARMA Initiative… Roger, we feel you.
27. HELEN, LOCKE’S GIRLFRIENDShe was nice.
26. SAYIDHe wasn't that nice, but he had more on his plate.
25. CHARLOTTEIt was hard to watch the nose bleeds, but we can’t begrudge an archeologist hero, now can we?
24. MICHAELSo many bad decisions, Michael. And so much harrowed shouting.
23. ETHAN ROMNobody does a dead-eyed stare like E-Rom.
22. PENNYOne half of the greatest love story in television history.
21. HURLEYAudience surrogate, comic relief, beacon of pathos, resident geek, everyman, proficient golfer. A winner.
NEXT: 20 - our #1 Lost chracter!
20. SUNSun’s lows are low, but her arc to redemption is a particularly challenging and interesting one.
19. ANTHONY COOPERIn earnest, the best villain Lost ever produced. Next to the piercing human condition, of course.
18. DETECTIVE MARSA hard-boiled lawman who has one job to do, but a heart he’s forced to lug around while doing it.
17. BERNARDAww. (See Rose)
16. JIN’S DADSorry, Kate’s dad. Jin’s dad is the padre supreme.
15. BOONEWhat a nice fella. And an incredible impetus for the “anyone can die” phenomenon that carried through the bulk of the series.
14. CHRISTIAN SHEPHARDWhether or not you like Christian Shephard is entirely dependent on how you feel about the finale. And I love the finale.
13. ROUSSEAUAn extended metaphor for the loss that courses throughout each character’s story, and the crash-and-burn phenomenon that will ensnare them if they do not seek and attack their issues… or maybe just a loony French lady. Either way, we dig it.
12. KATEWay more than just the “runs into the woods and gets in trouble” shtick that people fault her for, Kate is the gumption and emotional core of Lost. And we love her.
11. ARZTWhat a delightful jackass.
10. JOHN LOCKEThe beauty of Locke is how much you just want to punch him right in the nose… until you realize that he’s not presenting adversity, but challenging solutions.
9. ROSEEven aww-er.
8. SAWYERThe wincing pain of aloneness and self-loathing, evident in everything that the gallant Josh Holloway does with his consistently engaging (the LeFleur era a slight hiccup) character.
7. FRANK LAPIDUSFrank Lapidus monument currently in construction in the South Bronx.
6. DESMONDThe other half of the greatest love story ever committed to television… and, no offense to Penny, the half with the superior ‘do.
5. JACKOur hero, flawed though he may be, was the perfect man to guide us through this story about the fragmented tenets of the human experience. Desperate, lonely, contentious, prickly, and a bit of a tool at times, Jack is and remains the essence of what man is.
4. CHARLIE…But Charlie, in complement to Jack, is the essence of what man wants to be. Given the finest send-off on the series, Charlie becomes the hero that he always wished he could be, embracing his passion for music and his love for Claire to save his friends and surrogate family.
3. VINCENTLess a symbol than a silent character in his own right, Vincent represents that one glimmer of hope to which even the most cynical of us hang tight: the hope that we aren’t, and don’t have to be, alone. With Vincent around, nobody does.
2. BEN LINUSIf Jack is Charlie’s complement then Ben Linus is his stark contrast: the badness that enwraps each of us, causing us to so selfish, maniacal, underhanded things… but all to the same end: not being alone. Not the more admirable guy, but one of most complicated and interesting characters.
1. JINThe very best character arc on Lost comes attached to Jin, who began as an alienating question mark and wound up a fan favorite, an in-universe hero. Jin’s slow climb to island glory, paralleling his flashback descent down the gruesome drain of desperation, makes for Lost’s strongest, most entertaining, and perhaps most emotionally engrossing individual story. And man that ending!
Scottish actor David O'hara has been fined for hurling drunken insults at a police officer after a soccer match. The Departed star was accused of making nasty comments to a cop who had been called to investigate a recent disturbance in a taxi in Glasgow, Scotland. He was detained and taken back to a local police station.
During a hearing at Glasgow Sheriff Court on Friday (05Sep14), officials heard that O'Hara had later attempted to apologise to the police officer. He admitted a charge of acting in a racially aggravated manner intended to cause alarm and distress and was fined $340 (£200), according to Britain's The Sun newspaper.
New Doctor Who Peter Capaldi got some helpful tips on how to cope with the pressure of the iconic role from a very useful source - previous Time Lords Matt Smith and David Tennant. The Scottish actor, 56, took over from Smith, 31, in the hit sci-fi TV series last year (13) and his full debut as the time-travelling adventurer aired in the U.K. and U.S. last weekend (23-24Aug14).
He had previously told how landing the part was a childhood dream come true, but now he has confessed he was secretly terrified of taking on the role and received some wise words of advice from a previous and much younger incumbent.
Capaldi tells British newspaper The Sun, "I think I would have found this difficult when I was Matt's age. At that age, I was less assured as an actor than he is and not so in touch with my skills. I was watching him the other night in an old episode - he has such a magic and wisdom about him. And he's been a big help to me. Both he and David Tennant have been tremendously helpful."
Dance music superstar David Guetta has scored his fifth number one single on the U.K. music charts with Lovers On The Sun. The song, which features singer Sam Martin, has debuted at the top of the countdown.
Reacting to the news, Guetta says, "Wow, this is amazing! The UK has shown me so much love and support over the years, since I was an unknown DJ there. To be number one with the first song off my next album is taking a little bit of the pressure off finishing it, which is what I'm doing now."
Last week's number one, Nico & Vinz's Am I Wrong, drops to two while Magic!'s Rude takes the third spot.
Rounding out the top fie are Taylor Swift's Shake It Off and Wankelmut & Emma Louise's My Head Is A Jungle.
Meanwhile, boy band Collabro have scored their first number one album with their debut Stars.
Ed Sheeran's X falls to number two after spending much of the summer on top, and the Courteeners' Concrete Love comes in at number three.
Sam Smith's In The Lonely Hour and George Ezra's Wanted On Voyage complete the new top five.
Dance music superstar David Guetta has recruited Ray Liotta to star in a Western-themed music video for his new single Lovers On The Sun. The French DJ's track is already assisted by Avicii and features vocals by Sam Martin, but Guetta called in a Hollywood veteran for the new promo, which debuted on Tuesday (12Aug14).
In the Spaghetti Western homage, the Goodfellas star plays a villain who is intent on torturing the video's hero, but he is saved by a sexy heroine with magical powers, and the couple rides off into the sunset.
The track is taken from Guetta's latest EP of the same name, which was released in June (14).
Retired boxing legend Lennox Lewis has thrown his support behind his former manager Frank Maloney over his decision to undergo gender reassignment. The heavyweight champion admits the news came as a shock, but he is adamant Maloney deserves respect for courageously opening up about the move.
Maloney told over the weekend (09-10Aug14) how he is undergoing gender reassignment and is now a woman known as Kellie.
Lewis tells British newspaper The Sun, "The great thing about life and boxing is that you never know what to expect. This world isn't always cut and dried or black and white, and coming from the boxing fraternity, I can only imagine what a difficult decision this must be for Kellie.
"However, having taken some time to read Kellie's statement, I understand better what she, and others in similar situations are going through. I think all people should be allowed to live in a way that brings harmony and inner peace. I respect Kellie's decision and say if this is what brings about true happiness in her life, then so be it."
Maloney guided Lewis through his career from 1981 to 2001 and also managed fellow boxers David Haye and Rendall Munroe.
On Monday (11Aug14) Maloney revealed he had been so tormented by his desire to live as a woman that he even tried to kill himself in 2012 by taking an overdose of prescription pills but was found slumped in a bush by passers-by and taken to a hospital for treatment.
British soap star David Easter is "ecstatic" after a rape case against him was dropped. Easter, who has starred in U.K. soaps Brookside and Emmerdale, was interviewed under caution at a police station in Surrey, England in May (14) on one allegation of rape, which is said to have occurred 17 years ago involving a woman who was aged 30 at the time.
The actor, who was married to British TV personality Denise Welch for five years in the 1980s, denied the allegation and was allowed to leave the station hours later.
The case against the 54 year old has now been dropped due to lack of evidence.
His lawyer Julian Lee tells Britain's The Sun newspaper, "David is obviously ecstatic... thankfully (the claims) didn't get anywhere - I hope David can get on with his life now."
Hollywood actress Liv Tyler has found love with David Beckham's close friend Dave Gardner, according to a U.K. report. The Armageddon star, who is divorced from British rocker Royston Langdon, is believed to have struck up a romance with sports agent Gardner, who has previously been linked to Kelly Brook and Rita Ora, earlier this year (14).
A source tells Britain's The Sun newspaper the couple was introduced by supermodel Kate Moss, adding, "This is the real deal. Dave and Liv are madly in love... They've actually been an item for quite a long time, but have gone to great lengths to keep it a secret."
Tyler has a son with her ex-husband, while Gardner was previously married to British actress Davinia Taylor. Beckham was best man at Gardner's wedding.
Rock veterans Pink Floyd are to release their first new album in 20 years. The legendary band will unveil The Endless River in October (14), their first new record since 1994's The Division Bell.
The album is based on a series of tracks originally recorded in 1994 and previously intended for release under the title The Big Spliff.
Following the death of Pink Floyd keyboardist Richard Wright in 2008, David Gilmour and Nick Mason headed back into the studio to expand on the existing tracks and add some vocals to the songs.
However, fans hoping the news paves the way for a long-awaited reunion tour from the band are set for disappointment - a spokesman tells British newspaper The Sun on Sunday that the rockers will not be hitting the road to promote the album.
A new Broadway musical based on the songs of late rap icon Tupac Shakur has drawn mixed reviews following its official opening on Thursday (19Jun14). Acclaimed director Kenny Leon, who won a Tony Award earlier this month (Jun14) for his revival of A Raisin In the Sun, put together Holler If Ya Hear Me, a non-biographical show featuring a love story set to the hip-hop star's tracks.
The production, which was staged with the blessing of the California Love hitmaker's mother and estate executor Afeni Shakur, launched at New York's Palace Theatre on Thursday, but the musical has split critics.
The New York Daily News' Joe Dziemianowicz praises lead actor Saul Williams' portrayal of John, a self-taught artist who attempts to stay out of trouble after being released from prison, branding his performance "magnetic".
However, Dziemianowicz laments the "predictability" of the show's storyline, despite a "vibrant, raw and rousing" production - sentiments echoed by critics for both Variety and The New York Times.
The Times' Charles Isherwood insists the "beats are sweet, and the words often have an electric charge", but claims the "ambitious" show feels "heavy-handed", while The Hollywood Reporter's David Rooney was less than impressed, dismissing the show as "misconceived" and "destined to fall on deaf ears".