“Call me Helen Keller because I’m a f**king miracle worker.”
Does this sound like anyone you know? If you guessed Kenny Powers from EastBound and Down, you’re very, very, very wrong. For those of you who guessed Ari Gold from Entourage, correct! The group of friends are together again and slated to start production on the Entourage movie.
There have been rumors that this movie was going into production for quite some time now. The reason for the delay? The real life Ari Gold, Jeremy Piven, began with a larger deal than the other actors, Kevin Connolly, Jerry Ferrara, Adrian Grenier, and Kevin Dillon. It seems that the deal has been settled and everyone has kissed and made up.
To express our excitement we have collected a few of Ari Gold’s best and worst one liners. Read on -- but beware, they are sure to offend!
“Nobody’s happy in this town except for the losers. Look at me, I’m miserable, and I’m rich.”
“Vinnie, when you get married you realize that a wife is like a herpes sore. She comes and goes when and where she pleases.”
Quite possibly the most beneficial life lesson Ari Gold has taught us, “Well, life isn’t fair. So don’t f**king cry about it.”
Lions Gate via Everett Collection
When we last left our heroes, they had conquered all opponents in the 74th Annual Hunger Games, returned home to their newly refurbished living quarters in District 12, and fallen haplessly to the cannibalism of PTSD. And now we're back! Hitching our wagons once again to laconic Katniss Everdeen and her sweet-natured, just-for-the-camera boyfriend Peeta Mellark as they gear up for a second go at the Capitol's killing fields.
But hold your horses — there's a good hour and a half before we step back into the arena. However, the time spent with Katniss and Peeta before the announcement that they'll be competing again for the ceremonial Quarter Quell does not drag. In fact, it's got some of the film franchise's most interesting commentary about celebrity, reality television, and the media so far, well outweighing the merit of The Hunger Games' satire on the subject matter by having Katniss struggle with her responsibilities as Panem's idol. Does she abide by the command of status quo, delighting in the public's applause for her and keeping them complacently saturated with her smiles and curtsies? Or does Katniss hold three fingers high in opposition to the machine into which she has been thrown? It's a quarrel that the real Jennifer Lawrence would handle with a castigation of the media and a joke about sandwiches, or something... but her stakes are, admittedly, much lower. Harvey Weinstein isn't threatening to kill her secret boyfriend.
Through this chapter, Katniss also grapples with a more personal warfare: her devotion to Gale (despite her inability to commit to the idea of love) and her family, her complicated, moralistic affection for Peeta, her remorse over losing Rue, and her agonizing desire to flee the eye of the public and the Capitol. Oftentimes, Katniss' depression and guilty conscience transcends the bounds of sappy. Her soap opera scenes with a soot-covered Gale really push the limits, saved if only by the undeniable grace and charisma of star Lawrence at every step along the way of this film. So it's sappy, but never too sappy.
In fact, Catching Fire is a masterpiece of pushing limits as far as they'll extend before the point of diminishing returns. Director Francis Lawrence maintains an ambiance that lends to emotional investment but never imposes too much realism as to drip into territories of grit. All of Catching Fire lives in a dreamlike state, a stark contrast to Hunger Games' guttural, grimacing quality that robbed it of the life force Suzanne Collins pumped into her first novel.
Once we get to the thunderdome, our engines are effectively revved for the "fun part." Katniss, Peeta, and their array of allies and enemies traverse a nightmare course that seems perfectly suited for a videogame spin-off. At this point, we've spent just enough time with the secondary characters to grow a bit fond of them — deliberately obnoxious Finnick, jarringly provocative Johanna, offbeat geeks Beedee and Wiress — but not quite enough to dissolve the mystery surrounding any of them or their true intentions (which become more and more enigmatic as the film progresses). We only need adhere to Katniss and Peeta once tossed in the pit of doom that is the 75th Hunger Games arena, but finding real characters in the other tributes makes for a far more fun round of extreme manhunt.
But Catching Fire doesn't vie for anything particularly grand. It entertains and engages, having fun with and anchoring weight to its characters and circumstances, but stays within the expected confines of what a Hunger Games movie can be. It's a good one, but without shooting for succinctly interesting or surprising work with Katniss and her relationships or taking a stab at anything but the obvious in terms of sending up the militant tyrannical autocracy, it never even closes in on the possibility of being a great one.
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If the thought of Charlie Sheen in bed with Lindsay Lohan doesn’t make you gag – or worse, laugh – then congratulations, you are the only one! That also means you’re the only person excited for Scary Movie 5, which finds Sheen and Lohan in the aforementioned bed together before a ghost/demon wreaks more havoc than Sheen on a Tiger Blood-fueled bender.
The newest trailer for the fifth installment of the Scary Movie spoofing franchise just hit the web, and along with some Sheen/Lohan loving, we also get a glimpse of a contortionist Honey Boo Boo, a Snoop Dogg (sorry, Snoop Lion) crotch kick, and a con man posing as a demon psychic.
Spoofing Paranormal Activity and Mama, a happily-married couple begins to experience some unusual activity after bringing their newborn son home from the hospital. With the help of home-surveillance cameras and a team of experts, they learn they're being stalked by a nefarious demon and must learn how to get rid of it before it’s too late.
Watch the new trailer below:
Ashley Tisdale, Terry Crews, Kate Walsh, Jerry O’Connell, Heather Locklear, Molly Shannon, Chris Elliot, Ben Cornish, Mike Tyson, Simon Rex, Jasmine Guy, Kendra Wilkinson, and Audrina Patridge round out the cast. It’s interesting to note that Scary Movie 5 is the only film in the entire franchise that does not feature any main characters from the previous films (maybe because they knew it was time to bail…).
Scary Movie 5 hits theaters April 12.
Follow Sydney on Twitter: @SydneyBucksbaum
[Photo Credit: The Weinstein Company]
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While the fact that a cache of e-mails to and from various Bush family members leaked online recently isn't inherently scandalous, two image files included in the political family's correspondence sure are: Former President George W. Bush allegedly sent his sister two unfinished portraits of himself in the tub and the shower ... naked.
Yeah, you read that right — our president of eight years is nude in these paintings. And the former POTUS is the one who did it. Sure, the portraits aren't actually revealing in any way, but come on. The former President. Painted himself. Naked.
That's just pop culture gold right there. In his honor, Hollywood.com rounded up a few of the best (or at least funniest) tasteful nude portraits in pop culture history. Check them out below:
RELATED: Pop Culture Moments That Would Have Been Better Naked
Vince Vaughn's hard-partying playboy in Wedding Crashers didn't paint himself nude, nor did he even pose for his portrait, but he loved it nontheless. "It was a gift!"
Probably one of the most iconic nude portraits in pop culture was when Jack drew Rose before the Titanic met its unfortunate fate. "So serious!"
Who knew Jerry from Parks and Rec was such an artist? Starting at 3:03, check out his amazing, nude centaur incarnation of his boss, Leslie Knope.
And last but not least, how could we not include Will Ferrell (aka the greatest George W. Bush impersonator) as the inspiration in a nude sculpting class in a Saturday Night Live sketch?
Follow Sydney on Twitter: @SydneyBucksbaum
[Photo Credit: The Smoking Gun]
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This makes me want to high five a million angels. The Ben & Jerry's ice cream experts have just announced that they will unveil a new flavor inspired by NBC’S 30 Rock, just in time for the show's series finale on Thursday, Jan. 31.
The flavor will be ceremoniously unveiled by Ben & Jerry's co-founder Jerry Greenfield at a New York City finale party, just steps from 30 Rock's home — the titular building at Rockefeller Center. Invitees will gather to view the series finale of 30 Rock and sample the new flavor, which was freshly produced at its factories in Vermont and rushed to New York City for the event. Usually new flavors are released closer to spring, but the company decided to bump up the timetable to have the flavor on hand to accommodate the finale. It will be available across the country in Ben & Jerry’s scoop shops in February, and on the shelves of grocery stores and convenience stores shortly thereafter.
Ben & Jerry's also stated that it would offer a chance online to obtain the 30 Rock flavor, with more details to come. All proceeds raised will benefit the same non-profit organization, which will be announced on Thursday. In syndication, and now in the freezer, Ben & Jerry's is certain that the memory of 30 Rock will live on.
Liz Lemon would totally approve of this marketing genius, as she's the type of gal who can down a whole pint of ice cream in one sitting. This announcement got us thinking, though: if 30 Rock would make a good ice cream, what other shows could be yummy as food?
Parks and Recreation, Waffles
Leslie Knope is a waffle-enthusiast. A brand of fluffy, sweet waffles, complete with whip cream topping, would be the perfect breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snack food.
Breaking Bad, Bacon and Eggs
Well, this could be modified to all breakfast foods, thanks to Walter Jr.'s obsession with breakfast.
Once Upon a Time, Apple Turnovers
Henry proved once and for all to his mother, Emma, that fairytales were real after ingesting the Evil Queen's poisoned apple turnover. The amount of time she spent baking it made it look delicious... though we could do without the curse that comes with it.
The Following, Vodka
In the series premiere, Kevin Bacon's hardened serial killer-catcher filled up a water bottle with vodka to make it through a day of work. That... doesn't sound appetizing, but whatever floats his boat?
Doctor Who, Fish Fingers and Custard
After the Eleventh Doctor's regeneration, he gorges himself on a meal of fish sticks... and custard? I think we'll pass on this one.
[Photo Credit: NBC]
Follow Sydney on Twitter @SydneyBucksbaum
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In a post-Harry Potter Avatar and Lord of the Rings world the descriptors "sci-fi" and "fantasy" conjure up particular imagery and ideas. The Hunger Games abolishes those expectations rooting its alternate universe in a familiar reality filled with human characters tangible environments and terrifying consequences. Computer graphics are a rarity in writer/director Gary Ross' slow-burn thriller wisely setting aside effects and big action to focus on star Jennifer Lawrence's character's emotional struggle as she embarks on the unthinkable: a 24-person death match on display for the entire nation's viewing pleasure. The final product is a gut-wrenching mature young adult fiction adaptation diffused by occasional meandering but with enough unexpected choices to keep audiences on their toes.
Panem a reconfigured post-apocalyptic America is sectioned off into 12 unique districts and ruled under an iron thumb by the oppressive leaders of The Capitol. To keep the districts producing their specific resources and prevent them from rebelling The Capitol created The Hunger Games an annual competition pitting two 18-or-under "tributes" from each district in a battle to the death. During the ritual tribute "Reaping " teenage Katniss (Lawrence) watches as her 12-year-old sister Primrose is chosen for battle—and quickly jumps to her aid becoming the first District 12 citizen to volunteer for the games. Joined by Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) a meek baker's son and the second tribute Effie the resident designer and Haymitch a former Hunger Games winner-turned-alcoholic-turned-mentor Katniss rides off to The Capitol to train and compete in the 74th Annual Hunger Games.
The greatest triumph of The Hunger Games is Ross' rich realization of the book's many worlds: District 12 is painted as a reminiscent Southern mining town haunting and vibrant; The Capitol is a utopian metropolis obsessed with design and flair; and The Hunger Games battleground is a sprawling forest peppered with Truman Show-esque additions that remind you it's all being controlled by overseers. The small-scale production value adds to the character-first approach and even when the story segues to larger arenas like a tickertape parade in The Capitol's grand Avenue of Tributes hall it's all about Katniss.
For fans the script hits every beat a nearly note-for-note interpretation of author Suzanne Collins' original novel—but those unfamiliar shouldn't worry about missing anything. Ross knows his way around a sharp screenplay (he's the writer of Big Pleasantville and Seabiscuit) and he's comfortable dropping us right into the action. His characters are equally as colorful as Panem Harrelson sticking out as the former tribute enlivened by the chance to coach winners. He's funny he's discreet he's shaded—a quality all the cast members share. As a director Ross employs a distinct often-grating perspective. His shaky cam style emphasizes the reality of the story but in fight scenarios—and even simple establishing shots of District 12's goings-on—the details are lost in motion blur.
But the dread of the scenario is enough to make Hunger Games an engrossing blockbuster. The lead-up to the actual competition is an uncomfortable and biting satire of reality television sports and everything that commands an audience in modern society. Katniss' brooding friend Gale tells her before she departs "What if nobody watched?" speculating that carnage might end if people could turn away. Unfortunately they can't—forcing Katniss and Peeta to become "stars" of the Hunger Games. The duo are pushed to gussy themselves up put on a show and play up their romance for better ratings. Lawrence channels her reserved Academy Award-nominated Winter's Bone character to inhabit Katniss' frustration with the system. She's great at hunting but she doesn't want to kill. She's compassionate and considerate but has no interest in bowing down to the system. She's a leader but she knows full well she's playing The Capitol's game. Even with 23 other contestants vying for the top spot—like American Idol with machetes complete with Ryan Seacrest stand-in Caesar Flickerman (the dazzling Stanley Tucci)—Katniss' greatest hurdle is internal. A brave move for a movie aimed at a young audience.
By the time the actual Games roll around (the movie clocks in at two and a half hours) there's a need to amp up the pace that never comes and The Hunger Games loses footing. Katniss' goal is to avoid the action hiding in trees and caves waiting patiently for the other tributes to off themselves—but the tactic isn't all that thrilling for those watching. Luckily Lawrence Hutcherson and the ensemble of young actors still deliver when they cross paths and particular beats pack all the punch an all-out deathwatch should. PG-13 be damned the film doesn't skimp on the bloodshed even when it comes to killing off children. The Hunger Games bites off a lot for the first film of a franchise and does so bravely and boldly. It may not make it to the end alive but it doesn't go down without a fight.