New Year's Eve always proves to be the most stressful night of the entire year. Between deciding who to spend this monstrously important evening with, formulating a plan for an actual activity, and, someone help us, what to wear, the night ends up being destroyed by stress before it even begins. In our experience, the pain of preparation outweighs the fun we have, so this year, we're decidedly ringing in 2015 with a bottle of wine and movies about people having a worse time than we are.
Everyone on board the Poseidon (The Poseidon Adventure & Poseidon)
No matter what your NYE plans are, they will not end as disastrously as these people's. They board a luxury ocean liner heading across the Atlantic Ocean that encounters a rogue wave, capsizing the ship. Water floods through the windows, and most of the ship's passengers die in the fabulous ballroom where they were partying just moments ago. We bet that $500 open bar is looking pretty good right about now.
Michelle Tanner (Full House)
Queen of Speaking Truths, Michelle Tanner is understandably frustrated as she tries to grasp the appeal of this blasted holiday. Stay up way past your bedtime just to feel alone and make out with your dog? Whhhhyyyy?????
Bridget Jones (Bridget Jones's Diary)
Bridget may not be having a worse holiday than you are, but she's at least having one that's just as bad. Her booze-soaked Celine-Dion-singing evening is exactly how we envision our New Year's Eve going down (don't judge!), and for that, we love her. Plus, when your resolution involves losing 20 pounds (obviously), properly discarding last night's panties, and avoiding romantic attachments to alcoholics, workaholics, commitment phobics, peeping toms, megalomaniacs, emotional fuckwits, or perverts...you're an ideal NYE BFF.
This sledge hammer (Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve With Ryan Seacrest)
Though not technically a person, we still would not trade places with this construction tool under any circumstances imaginable. Only Jenny McCarthy could make us envy the unfortunate sledge hammer Miley licked.
"Little" Bill Thompson (Boogie Nights)
William H. Macy's character in Paul Thomas Anderson's Golden Age of Porn drama is often embarrassed by his porn star wife engaging in public sexual acts with other men, usually asking him to just let her do her thing. At a NYE party marking the year 1980, Bill walks in on his wife and her lover, calmly procures a gun, and then shoots both of them before turning the gun on himself. While we may have wanted to "shoot ourselves" from the stress of the night, we think he's having a much worse night than most of us.
Chandler Bing (Friends)
Your favorite sarcastic Friend, Chandler, is openly desperate where most of us just silently suffer. As midnight rolls around, he so pines for affection and validation that he jumps up and down demanding some action. NYE lesson to be learned: be careful what you wish for.
Ted (Four Rooms)
Tim Roth plays a hotel bellhop on his first night of work as he navigates through four different stories, directed by Allison Anders, Alexandre Rockwell, Robert Rodriguez, and Quentin Tarantino. He deals with witches who need his semen (Anders' segment), reluctantly becomes a part of a married couple's hostage fantasy (Rockwell's), is stabbed with a syringe by children he's forced to babysit who set the room on fire before discovering a dead prostitute in the bed (Rodriguez's), and is finally paid to chop off a man's finger (Tarantino's). Needless to say, your night is looking a bit better.
Miranda Hobbes and Carrie Bradshaw (Sex and the City: The Movie)
These usually fabulous ladies had a bummer of a New Year's Eve. After learning that Steve cheated on Miranda and a disaster of a wedding attempt by Carrie and Big, the ladies opted for a depressing night in, each alone (though Miranda was with one of our best friends, Chinese food, while Carrie as with our other bestie, bed). Their nights may start out depressing, but they helped us realize that you're never alone as long as you have a best friend and a fiiiieeerce pajama/mink outfit combo.
Monica (200 Cigarettes)
Monica is determined to throw an amazing party, but when nobody shows up at first, she becomes upset and a bit desperate. She does the only logical thing a person can do in that scenario: she gets so drunk that she passes out. Everyone ends up coming to her party, including Elvis Costello. She wakes up with a bunch of strangers on her floor and is thrilled, but her night positively sucked, if we do say so ourselves.
The entire cast of New Year's Eve
No matter what happens on New Year's, at least you didn't star in this awful movie. Just be thankful for that.
Tommy Lee Jones, Jessica Alba and Michelle Yeoh will join Jason Statham in the sequel to action movie The Mechanic. Brit Statham will return as hitman Arthur Bishop in Dennis Gansel's Mechanic: Resurrection
TV titan Oprah Winfrey fought back tears as she honoured Maya Angelou as the "greatest woman" she has ever known at the iconic poet's funeral on Saturday (07Jun14). The acclaimed writer's family and friends gathered at the main chapel at Wake Forest University in Winston-Salem, North Carolina to remember Angelou during a private service, which featured tributes from Winfrey, former U.S. President Bill Clinton and U.S. First Lady Michelle Obama.
Angelou's grandson Elliott Jones welcomed mourners to the ceremony to celebrate "an amazing life - a life well-lived", and then started the memorial by reading a passage from the author's poem Still I Rise.
Clinton remembered the writer as having "the greatest voice on the planet", one which Obama admitted could lift her "right out of my own little head", but it was Winfrey's emotional speech which really moved the congregation.
She revealed she had counted Angelou as a close friend and mentor long before she rose to superstardom as a talk show and media mogul, and credited the poet with teaching her to always stay positive and look for the rainbow in the clouds.
Struggling to contain her sadness, Winfrey added, "Maya Angelou is the greatest woman I have ever known. She was my anchor. So it's hard to describe to you what it means when your anchor shifts."
The two-hour memorial service, which was also attended by actor/director Tyler Perry and veteran actress Cicely Tyson, featured performances from gospel singer Bobby Jones and country star Lee Ann Womack, who belted out her hit I Hope You Dance - one of Angelou's favourite songs.
The writer and poet, who had taught at Wake Forest University since 1982, died in her sleep on 28 May (14) at the age of 86.
Superstar couple Beyonce and Jay Z are set for a big night at the 2014 BET Awards with four nominations apiece. The Crazy in Love hitmakers will compete against each other in the Best Collaboration category, in which Beyonce's song Drunk in Love, which features her husband, will battle Jay Z and Justin Timberlake's Holy Grail. Drake and Majid Jordan's Hold On (We're Going Home), Robin Thicke, T.I. and Pharrell Williams' Blurred Lines, YG's My Hitta collaboration with Jeezy and Rich Homie Quan and I Luv This by August Alsina and Trinidad Jame$ are also up for the prize.
Meanwhile, rivals Jay Z and Drake will go toe to toe in the Best Male Hip Hop Artist category, alongside Future, J. Cole and Kendrick Lamar, while Beyonce will battle Janelle Monae, Jhene Aiko, K. Michelle, Rihanna and Tamar Braxton for the Best Female R&B/Pop Artist title. Jay Z and Beyonce will also vie for the coveted Video of the Year award with the videos for Drunk in Love and Partition, respectively. Pharrell Williams' Happy, Chris Brown's Fine China and Drake's Worst Behavior are also nominated.
In the movie categories, Angela Bassett, Gabrielle Union, Kerry Washington, Lupita Nyong'o and Oprah Winfrey will fight for the Best Actress prize, and Chiwetel Ejiofor, Forest Whitaker, Idris Elba, Kevin Hart and Michael B. Jordan are up for the Best Actor trophy. The Best Movie nominees are: 12 Years a Slave, The Best Man Holiday, Fruitvale Station, Kevin Hart: Let Me Explain and Lee Daniels' The Butler.
The 2014 BET Awards will be handed out at the Nokia Theatre in Los Angeles on 29 June (14).
The full list of nominees are:
Best Female R&B/Pop Artist: Beyonce, Janelle Monae, Jhene Aiko, K. Michelle, Rihanna, Tamar Braxton
Best Male R&B/Pop Artist: August Alsina, Chris Brown, John Legend, Justin Timberlake, Pharrell Williams
Best Group A$AP Mob Daft Punk Macklemore & Ryan Lewis TGT Young Money
Best Collaboration August Alsina featuring Trinidad Jame$ - I Luv This Beyonce featuring Jay Z - Drunk in Love Drake featuring Majid Jordan - Hold On (We're Going Home) Jay Z featuring Justin Timberlake - Holy Grail Robin Thicke featuring T.I. & Pharell Williams - Blurred Lines YG featuring Jeezy & Rich Homie Quan - My Hitta
Best Male Hip Hop Artist Drake Future J. Cole Jay Z Kendrick Lamar
Best Female Hip Hop Artist Angel Haze Charli Baltimore Eve Iggy Azalea Nicki Minaj Video of the Year Beyonce - Partition Beyonce featuring Jay Z - Drunk in Love Chris Brown - Fine China Drake - Worst Behavior Pharrell Williams - Happy
Video Director of the Year Benny Boom Chris Brown Colin Tiley Director X Hype Williams
Best New Artist Ariana Grande August Alsina Mack Wilds Rich Homie Quan ScHoolboy Q
Best Gospel Artist Donnie McClurkin Erica Campbell Hezekiah Walker Tamela Mann Tye Tribbett
Best Actress Angela Bassett Gabrielle Union Kerry Washington Lupita Nyong'o Oprah Winfrey
Best Actor Chiwetel Ejiofor Forest Whitaker Idris Elba Kevin Hart Michael B. Jordan
YoungStars Award Gabrielle Douglas Jacob Latimore Jaden Smith KeKe Palmer Zendaya
Best Movie 12 Years a Slave The Best Man Holiday Fruitvale Station Kevin Hart: Let Me Explain Lee Daniels' The Butler
Subway Sportswoman of the Year Brittney Griner Lolo Jones Serena Williams Skylar Diggins Venus Williams
Subway Sportsman of the Year Blake Griffin Carmelo Anthony Floyd Mayweather Jr. Kevin Durant LeBron James
Centric Award Aloe Blacc - The Man Jennifer Hudson featuring T.I. - I Can't Describe (The Way I Feel)" Jhene Aiko - The Worst LiV Warfield - Why Do You Lie? Wale featuring Sam Dew - LoveHate Thing
Best International Act: Africa Davido (Nigeria) Diamond Platnumz (Tanzania) Mafikizolo (South Africa) Sarkodie (Ghana) Tiwa Savage (Nigeria) Toofan (Togo)
Best International Act: UK Dizzee Rascal Ghetts Krept & Konan Laura Mvula Rita Ora Tinie Tempah
Celebrities always thank their moms at awards shows, but some of these mothers have been especially instrumental in their children’s careers. Be the mothers figures of adversity, celebrities in their own right, or simply just strong, supportive, caring role models, there's no denying how big an impact they've made on their children.
Here are just a few of the most impressive moms behind some of our favorite stars.
GALLERY: The Very Best Mothers Behind Our Favorite Celebrities
For the bulk of every Rocky and Bullwinkle episode, moose and squirrel would engage in high concept escapades that satirized geopolitics, contemporary cinema, and the very fabrics of the human condition. With all of that to work with, there's no excuse for why the pair and their Soviet nemeses haven't gotten a decent movie adaptation. But the ingenious Mr. Peabody and his faithful boy Sherman are another story, intercut between Rocky and Bullwinkle segments to teach kids brief history lessons and toss in a nearly lethal dose of puns. Their stories and relationship were much simpler, which means that bringing their shtick to the big screen would entail a lot more invention — always risky when you're dealing with precious material.
For the most part, Mr. Peabody & Sherman handles the regeneration of its heroes aptly, allowing for emotionally substance in their unique father-son relationship and all the difficulties inherent therein. The story is no subtle metaphor for the difficulties surrounding gay adoption, with society decreeing that a dog, no matter how hyper-intelligent, cannot be a suitable father. The central plot has Peabody hosting a party for a disapproving child services agent and the parents of a young girl with whom 7-year-old Sherman had a schoolyard spat, all in order to prove himself a suitable dad. Of course, the WABAC comes into play when the tots take it for a spin, forcing Peabody to rush to their rescue.
Getting down to personals, we also see the left brain-heavy Peabody struggle with being father Sherman deserves. The bulk of the emotional marks are hit as we learn just how much Peabody cares for Sherman, and just how hard it has been to accept that his only family is growing up and changing.
But more successful than the new is the film's handling of the old — the material that Peabody and Sherman purists will adore. They travel back in time via the WABAC Machine to Ancient Egypt, the Renaissance, and the Trojan War, and 18th Century France, explaining the cultural backdrop and historical significance of the settings and characters they happen upon, all with that irreverent (but no longer racist) flare that the old cartoons enjoyed. And oh... the puns.
Mr. Peabody & Sherman is a f**king treasure trove of some of the most amazingly bad puns in recent cinema. This effort alone will leave you in awe.
The film does unravel in its final act, bringing the science-fiction of time travel a little too close to the forefront and dropping the ball on a good deal of its emotional groundwork. What seemed to be substantial building blocks do not pay off in the way we might, as scholars of animated family cinema, have anticipated, leaving the movie with an unfinished feeling.
But all in all, it's a bright, compassionate, reasonably educational, and occasionally funny if not altogether worthy tribute to an old favorite. And since we don't have our own WABAC machine to return to a time of regularly scheduled Peabody and Sherman cartoons, this will do okay for now.
If nothing else, it's worth your time for the puns.
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It isn't every comedian that can get away with doing an entire interview on The Tonight Show doing an imitation of someone else. Yet, when Kristen Wiig did exactly that — taking a seat next to buddy Jimmy Fallon dressed like One Direction's Harry Styles during his first week as host — it was completely charming. The same goes for when Wiig pops in on her old Saturday Night Live stomping grounds, as when she showed up in a cold open this season reprising her highly inappropriate, small-handed Dooneese character during a parody of NBC's The Sound of Music.
Quite simply, the Bridesmaids star makes every TV show that she comes in contact with better just by her presence, so why should that be limited to just late night? There are plenty of primetime offerings that could use some of Wiig's charm.
Parks and RecreationFellow SNL alum Amy Poehler's show has a strong history of funny guest stars (Louis CK, Parker Posey, Megan Mullally) so the writers would know what to do with Wiig. With Rob Lowe and Rashida Jones having departed, there's also plenty of available screen time. Even if it's just for a single episode, the show could use the boost. We've already met two of Nick Offerman's ex-wives both named Tammy (same as his domineering mother). What could it hurt to have a just as crazy Tammy III?
Downtown AbbeyWiig was just in Will Ferrell's period piece parody miniseries The Spoils of Babylon on IFC, so she should be good with the costumes. Elizabeth McGovern's Cora Crawley is from the States… she has to have a cousin someplace, right? Wiig is just the person to turn up as an ugly American full of dating advice and some "just get over it already" tips for Lady Mary (Michelle Dockery).
The Vampire DiariesWe get it… hot vampires. After five seasons of watching pretty people fall in and out of love, biting each other's necks just isn't enough anymore. Let's say that Paul Wesley's Salvatore has an undead aunt that wants to pal around with Nina Dobrev's Elena… or Katherine or Amara or whatever other doppelgangers she has. Wiig seems perfectly capable of turning from funny to scary in a heartbeat… or, you know, whatever vampires have.
Game of ThronesWiig's pal Ferrell had a spoof on his Funny or Die website that turned GoT into a reality show. The producers of HBO's smash probably wouldn't want to go full-on comedy, but we could see Wiig doing a guest turn as a woman that befriends Peter Dinklage's Tyrion, only to be killed in some horribly graphic way just as he's starting to feel a little bit better about life.
The BlacklistNBC has a hit in the freshman James Spader thriller, but the struggling Peacock network can't afford to take any chances. It's always far better to keep the audience entertained while they're still watching a show than to have to lure them back later after they're already watching whatever's on CBS at the time. The show hasn't done much in the way of name guest stars so far, but Isabella Rossellini did make an appearance so it's not like they're completely averse to it. Maybe the next name on Spader's list could be a woman who controls foreign leaders from behind the scenes using her looks and charm… and maybe, just maybe, she has really, really tiny hands.
20th Century Fox Home Entertainment
David E. Kelley has created some amazing television series, including Ally McBeal, The Practice, and Boston Legal. He’s also married to the utterly stunning Michelle Pfeiffer. But before all of that, one of his early series was Picket Fences. This ensemble drama focused on a small town and included a legal component and how small crime cases affected the entire population.
Sherriff Jimmy Brock (Tom Skerritt) has to police the small town of Rome, Wisconsin. His wife Dr. Jill Brock (Kathy Baker) is the town doctor. They have two sons and a pensive teen daughter, Kimberly (Holly Marie Combs). He manages a precinct with sexy deputies Maxine Stewart (Lauren Holly) and Kenny Lacos (Costas Mandylor). Each episode, an unusual crime or legal issue will culminate in a court case presided over by Judge Henry Bone (Ray Walston) and defense attorney Douglas Wambaugh (Fyvush Finkel).
The series has a similar irreverence to Ally McBeal. The town features unique characters including the nosy 911 operator Ginny Weedon (Zelda Rubinstein) and the slightly creepy coroner Carter Pike (Kelly Connell). It also focuses on the legality of bizarre court cases including an assailant that likes to take baths in people’s homes, a case of spontaneous human combustion, and the legality of euthanasia.
The series has something for everyone. Each episode has equal parts family drama, the romantic interplay of the two sexy deputies, the procedural crime drama of the case of the episode, and the legal tension of court proceedings. There is also a ton of humor in the exchanges between Walston and Finkel. It also explores morality without being overly preachy. It doesn’t push an agenda but rather explores all sides of the issue.
Picket Fences offers a refreshing look back at a family drama that has a happy family. The Brock family is a united family unit dealing with the social issues, bizarre crimes, and dramatic tension of their offbeat small town. Despite the lack of internet and cell phones, the series does have some pretty relevant subject matter that holds up .
The series won multiple Emmy Awards both for the series and for leads Skerritt, Baker, Finkel, Walston, and Leigh Taylor-Young. It also featured notable appearances by James Earl Jones and Marlee Matlin.
This series makes great binge watching material, and the first two seasons are available for free on Hulu.
Ferdaus Shamim/GettyWith original member Charlie Simpson still refusing to go back to his boyband-with-guitars days now that he's a semi-credible singer-songwriter, Matt Willis and James Bourne, aka the remaining members of mid-'00s UK chart-toppers Busted, have now instead hooked up with the group they undoubtedly paved the way for, McFly, for the latest big pop reunion tour. But which other pop acts could realistically join forces to form in the wake of the newest 'supergroup' McBusted. Here's a look at five potential ideas.Destiny's Child/TLCIt's unlikely that Beyoncé will ever wish to share the limelight with her former Destiny's Child bandmates for more than a few minutes, a la the Super Bowl, ever again. But there's nothing to stop Kelly and Michelle hooking up with T-Boz and Chilli to create the ultimate 90s R&B girlband crossover.Sugababes Versions 1-4The recent reunion of Mutya Keisha Siobhan, the original line-up of the ever-revolving Sugababes, hasn't exactly been a roaring success, while the latest line-up of Jade, Heidi and Amelle has been missing in action ever since 2011. But with a decade of hook-laden hits between them, a show featuring the four various line-ups would undoubtedly reignite both parties' careers.BSBNSYNCBackstreet Boys have already embraced the supergroup concept having toured and recorded with New Kids On The Block. And while Justin Timberlake is too much of a superstar to revisit his teen-pop past for more than a quick MTV VMA medley, the other four members would surely be open to hooking up with their old rivals for a feast of late '90s/early '00s boyband pop.S Club 15The term 'supergroup' might be pushing it here but it would certainly be interesting to see one of the biggest pop groups of the early '00s, S Club 7, team up with the eight members of their mini-me spin-off S Club Juniors – two of which are now in The Saturdays – for a massive S Club Party.Boyzone/WestlifeThey would possibly be the dreariest pop 'supergroup' of all time, but fans of karaoke covers and 'stand up for the key change' ballads would be in pop heaven if Irish boyband Boyzone and their recently-defunct successors Westlife decided to pool their coma-inducing resources together.
Lions Gate via Everett Collection
When we last left our heroes, they had conquered all opponents in the 74th Annual Hunger Games, returned home to their newly refurbished living quarters in District 12, and fallen haplessly to the cannibalism of PTSD. And now we're back! Hitching our wagons once again to laconic Katniss Everdeen and her sweet-natured, just-for-the-camera boyfriend Peeta Mellark as they gear up for a second go at the Capitol's killing fields.
But hold your horses — there's a good hour and a half before we step back into the arena. However, the time spent with Katniss and Peeta before the announcement that they'll be competing again for the ceremonial Quarter Quell does not drag. In fact, it's got some of the film franchise's most interesting commentary about celebrity, reality television, and the media so far, well outweighing the merit of The Hunger Games' satire on the subject matter by having Katniss struggle with her responsibilities as Panem's idol. Does she abide by the command of status quo, delighting in the public's applause for her and keeping them complacently saturated with her smiles and curtsies? Or does Katniss hold three fingers high in opposition to the machine into which she has been thrown? It's a quarrel that the real Jennifer Lawrence would handle with a castigation of the media and a joke about sandwiches, or something... but her stakes are, admittedly, much lower. Harvey Weinstein isn't threatening to kill her secret boyfriend.
Through this chapter, Katniss also grapples with a more personal warfare: her devotion to Gale (despite her inability to commit to the idea of love) and her family, her complicated, moralistic affection for Peeta, her remorse over losing Rue, and her agonizing desire to flee the eye of the public and the Capitol. Oftentimes, Katniss' depression and guilty conscience transcends the bounds of sappy. Her soap opera scenes with a soot-covered Gale really push the limits, saved if only by the undeniable grace and charisma of star Lawrence at every step along the way of this film. So it's sappy, but never too sappy.
In fact, Catching Fire is a masterpiece of pushing limits as far as they'll extend before the point of diminishing returns. Director Francis Lawrence maintains an ambiance that lends to emotional investment but never imposes too much realism as to drip into territories of grit. All of Catching Fire lives in a dreamlike state, a stark contrast to Hunger Games' guttural, grimacing quality that robbed it of the life force Suzanne Collins pumped into her first novel.
Once we get to the thunderdome, our engines are effectively revved for the "fun part." Katniss, Peeta, and their array of allies and enemies traverse a nightmare course that seems perfectly suited for a videogame spin-off. At this point, we've spent just enough time with the secondary characters to grow a bit fond of them — deliberately obnoxious Finnick, jarringly provocative Johanna, offbeat geeks Beedee and Wiress — but not quite enough to dissolve the mystery surrounding any of them or their true intentions (which become more and more enigmatic as the film progresses). We only need adhere to Katniss and Peeta once tossed in the pit of doom that is the 75th Hunger Games arena, but finding real characters in the other tributes makes for a far more fun round of extreme manhunt.
But Catching Fire doesn't vie for anything particularly grand. It entertains and engages, having fun with and anchoring weight to its characters and circumstances, but stays within the expected confines of what a Hunger Games movie can be. It's a good one, but without shooting for succinctly interesting or surprising work with Katniss and her relationships or taking a stab at anything but the obvious in terms of sending up the militant tyrannical autocracy, it never even closes in on the possibility of being a great one.
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