WHAT’S IT ABOUT?
Carbon copying the already overly convoluted idea from the previous Final Destination movies the latest worst installment continues on the theme of one unlucky twentysomething being able to predict who’s going to die and when; this time it’s Nick. After attending a NASCAR race with his girlfriend Lori and their friends Hunt and Janet Nick has a premonition about an elaborate horrific accident that threatens everyone present. Naturally it comes true — and even though plenty of people die in the stands Death (you know the bogeyman) has only just begun. But Nick realizes that he might be able to save the survivors of that day by remembering the order in which they're supposed to die and warning them of their imminent demise. Unfortunately though not everyone believes him and they carry on with their dangerous activities ... like going to a hair salon or — gulp! — through a carwash.
WHO’S IN IT?
Up-and-coming actor Bobby Campo plays the main pretty young thing and he makes the best of what is ultimately an untenable and God-awful role to have to accept. Still fresh faces capable of pulling off his part are a dime a dozen and Destination’s past leads like Mary Elizabeth Winstead at least left us feeling their fear. Supporting actresses Shantel VanSanten as Lori and Haley Webb as Janet are there for little more than eye candy and ear-shredding screams while former MTV 'It' dude Nick Zano as the obnoxious clichéd — and obnoxiously clichéd — Hunt can’t even provide the occasional comic relief for which he was brought on. The lone bright spot comes courtesy of an evidently desperate-for-work Mykelti Williamson (aka Bubba in Forrest Gump) who plays a widowed security guard adding a shred of cred to the otherwise disposable cast (which includes a barely there Krista Allen).
Clocking in at a mercifully brisk hour and 15 minutes the makers of TFD find one way to not essentially call us stupid: They know we want our scares quickly and they deliver — except for actually scaring us. Aside from its running time the aforementioned credible performance by Williamson is literally all the movie has going for it.
Wow where to begin? Destination another in a loooong line of wholly unnecessary sequels is riddled with problems — from the are-you-kidding-me? “special” effects (even in 3-D) to the jaw-droppingly horrendous writing. Director David R. Ellis (helmer of the infinitely better Final Destination 2) should bear much of the blame. He seems uninterested in delivering anything that people go to the movies for; this Destination is nothing more than tenuously connected scenes of video-game-like deaths that try to one-up each other. And not one of the sequences is even mildly suspenseful or scary — just disturbing in the sense that some people will actually smirk in earnest at the cartoonishness of it all.
The writing though is the real culprit. Eric Bress’ (also an FD2 alum) script is incredibly unimaginative merely recycling similar but better executed scenarios from the three previous movies and swapping out the settings. With ideas so bad Bress makes it abundantly clear that there’s no inane death massacre left to explore at this point; it's basically a metaphorical surrender. And yet the dialogue is even worse — with stock stereotypical block characters muttering it to boot.
LEAST FAVORITE SCENE?
Not to completely give it away — lest we make the movie predictable! — but one of the death scenes is just so far beyond ridiculous that it transcends even sarcastic laughter. Hint: It involves water and it’s about midway through the movie … if you dare stay that long.
Even if you’re not a cinephile and you couldn’t care less about things like character depth and plot development and you’re looking for a very quick thrill The Final Destination is well beneath you. It makes recent straight-to-DVD releases look like fully coherent masterpieces. Whether in 3-D or 2-D it’s a mustn't-see!
Since the age of 12 Marcus (Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson) wanted to be a rapper. After his mother Katrina (Serena Reeder) is brutally killed Marcus’ rap dreams are put on hold and he begins hustling drugs to make enough money for a nice pair of shoes. Only he doesn’t stop at the shoes. When Marcus gets involved with Majestic (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje) he sees how much money there is to be made in the drug business and he wants it all. Then his childhood best friend Charlene (Joy Bryant) moves back to Queens and they fall in love. But it isn’t too long before she gets pregnant and he is arrested. While perfecting his rap skills in jail he meets Bama (Terrence Howard) who becomes his manager and lifesaver on the outside taking him out of the drug game for good. 50 Cent may have the rap world locked up but his acting skills leave a lot to be desired. Watching him trying to emote is sort of akin to watching a bad comic bomb on stage. He seems to be the first rapper-turn-actors these days who can’t cut it. Thankfully Get Rich’s supporting cast help out--a little. Marc John Jefferies (Stuart Little 2 Spider-Man 2) who plays the young Marcus nearly steals the show. At first loving and caring then turning cold and unforgiving Jefferies made it look easy to flip the switch between the two. Another standout is Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (HBO’s Oz) as the crooked drug lord Majestic. And in a year chockfull of good performances Terrence Howard who obviously just wanted to work with Sheridan adds much needed comic relief as the quirky Bama. Director Jim Sheridan whose resume includes Oscar-winning films such as In America and My Left Foot probably thought that if Oscar-winning director Curtis Hanson could handle Eminem’s 8 Mile with aplomb then he could do the same thing with a gangsta rap story. Guess he forgot the fact Hanson (L.A. Confidential) can do gritty. The very Irish Sheridan is just clearly way out of his element. Get Rich jumps around so much you don’t have any time to figure out what’s happening who’s who or where the heck the film’s heading. And it doesn’t help that the chaotic script is peppered with such stereotypical dialogue. Honestly if you want to see a compelling story about a wannabe rapper getting his shot (and not shot at) rent this year’s Hustle & Flow.