Britney Spears was born Dec. 2, 1981. And now that it's the new millennium and stuff, the singer/dancer/icon has decided to reflect upon her nearly two minutes, er, two decades on this Earth in a book. Britney Spears According to today's New York Daily News, the memoir, titled "Britney," will be published in time for the release of Spears' follow-up album, due in record stores May 9. (Coincidences are the neatest things!)
We wanted to ask Britney's publisher stuff about how long the book is and what Britney talks about and all that, but nobody returned our call. Probably too busy digesting the import of their new scribe's tome, no doubt.
What we know is this: Britney's writing "Britney" with her mom. (Old people are such good spellers!) According to the News, the Britster, who became the leading teen-queen singer with her mega-selling 1999 debut collection "... Baby One More Time," will spill the goods on "the secrets of her success" and "the importance of family communication."
If all that sounds terribly, well, uninteresting, Miss Spears is at a disadvantage when pitted against celeb authors. Unlike her more experienced autobiographers, Spears doesn't have the usual made-money-lost-money-went-to-Betty-Ford-found-the-Lord tale.
She does, however, have some really cool outfits to show off in the exclusive pictures section!
CHAPTER TWO -- SHAMPOOS I USED: In other Britney Spears news, the ex-Mouseketeer has inked a deal to do the endorsement thing for Herbal Essences haircare products. Who said her life story had no pathos?
SPLITSVILLE! Actor Keifer Sutherland ("Young Guns") had filed for the Big D from his wife of three years. Sutherland, 33, and the former Kelly Winn wed Sept. 1, 1996. According to divorce papers filed recently in Los Angeles Superior Court, the couple had been separated since June 30.
COUPLEDOM! Now it can be told: "American Psycho" star Christian Bale, 26, wed civilian Sibi Blazic on Jan. 29 in Las Vegas, gossip maven Liz Smith and other sources report.
ROCKED, NOT ROLLED: Not a good week to be a rocker. Nigel Pulsford, guitarist for alt-rock band Bush ("Everything Zen"), is nursing a broken ankle suffered in a fall from a stage. Meanwhile, Amy Ray, one-half of folkie duo the Indigo Girls, is on the mend following two-fer surgery over the weekend for (1) an appendectomy and (2) an ovarian cyst.
"BEAUTY" PAGEANT: Some more fodder for your Oscar pool: "American Beauty" was named best picture, Kevin Spacey ("American Beauty") best actor and Hilary Swank ("Boys Don't Cry") best actress by the Chicago Film Critics, as announced Monday.
Brace yourself Dr. Laura. This clueless teen queen (Natasha Lyonne) has it all: good looks a football captain boyfriend and a popular pair of pom-poms. But her candy-colored world crumbles when her panicked parents stage an intervention after finding a Melissa Etheridge poster that leads them to conclude she's a friend of Ellen. After being carted off to an anti-gay rehab camp for teens the perky princess must choose between the straight and narrow-minded or the love that dare not speak its name.
The quirky ensemble casting is half this film's fun. Lyonne is charming as the pepster tempted by T&A and she sparks onscreen with swanky and sexy co-star Clea DuVall who plays the butch femme fatale suitor (alarmingly reminiscent of Nancy McKeon's Jo from "The Facts of Life.") Drag queen supreme RuPaul is unrecognizable out of his high heels and even higher blond wig wearing a "Straight is Great" T-shirt as a macho militant ex-gay counselor. Cathy Moriaty is sweetly sinister as the homophobic headmistress and Mink Stole steals scenes as the uptight upright meddling mom.
Kudos to Jamie Babbit for tackling this hot-potato topic but this well-intentioned film too often misses its mark turning potentially comical scenes into unbearably awkward moments. Babbit fouls when tugging at the heartstrings but hits home runs when the humor is at its broadest.