In case you hadn't heard, there's an election taking over your television tonight. While the chances of seeing a hologram or hearing a complete and total disregard for facts aren't likely to be on their programs (unlike, say CNN or Fox News, respectively), we here at Hollywood.com simply can't stay away from Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. Especially not on election night. Both of the funny faux pundits' (fundits!) award-winning Comedy Central shows will be airing live on this historic evening bringing their patented brand of smarts, swift humor, truthiness, and utter lack of tolerance for those who stand high atop Bulls**t Mountain.
Starting at 11 pm, Stewart and The Daily Show will broadcast their half-hour special Election Night 2012: This Ends Now, followed immediately by The Colbert Report's half-hour spectacularly named edition Election 2012: A Nation Votes, Ohio Decides; The Re-Presidenting of America: Who Will Replace Obama? ‘012!. It's going to be way more entertaining than CSPAN. Okay, everything is more fun than CSPAN, but the Stewart/Colbert doubleheader is going to infinitely more entertaining than CSPAN and we're not going to miss a single minute of it.
Hollywood.com will be live-blogging The Daily Show and The Colbert Report's election coverage beginning at 11 PM ET sharp. We're going to keep you up to date with every Mitt Romney joke, every Barack Obama pun, every up-to-the-minute announcement, and every surprise. In the words of Mr. Colbert himself, "Woooooooooo!" It's going to be one hell of an interesting night, folks.
12:02: Goodnight everybody! Hope you had as much fun watching these two as much as I did!
12:01: Colbert 2016!
12:00: "For some tomorrow will be like Christmas, for others the fifth day of Hannukah. Or so my writers tell me."
11:56: "Lock the door before my audience moves to Denver."
11:54: Angus King = Independent winner AND a Burger King menu item.
11:48: Why does everything sound better in a British accent? Wait! I mean...USA! USA! USA!
11:47: Fox News jokes are at a fever pitch, on Colbert and everywhere else.
11:44: Guest Andrew Sullivan is soaking in the conservative tears of sadness.
11:40: Barack won the Presidency, but Colbert is winning the Comedy Central coverage double-header.
11:36: Mitt Romney graphic of him dancing with his horse was worth enduring this entire process.
11:35: Animal Planet called it: Obie is the President again! Crowd. Goes. Wild.
11:33: Aw! Happy birthday, Stephen Colbert's mom! We got you a President!
11:33: Colbert should win Emmys on opening graphics alone.
11:32: I could watch Stewart and Colbert banter all day.
11:30: Colbert isn't hearing it!
11:29: "Perhaps the fever has broken." We got a fever. And the only prescription is more Obama and Daily Show.
11:28: The mood is happy in that studio!
11:22: Have to flip between Comedy Central and — gasp! — cable news. Love hologram Jason Jones, but hate to miss this historic moment.
11:16: Time to catch up, guys!! Obama has been re-elected!
11:12: 2016 Presidential numbers are in...and it's Hilary!
11:11: Akin, Mourdock, and Walsh announcements and electoral count updates. Crowd is loving it. Hey, The Daily Show knows their crowd.
11:07: The delay censors must have loved keeping up with Aasif.
11:05: John Oliver might not be able to vote in our country, but he gets our vote. He's killing this riff on cable news technology.
11:03: Cheers for Elizabeth Warren, Scott Brown gets tossed in the water, Tea party-style. WHY haven't they been broadcasting all night?
11:02: Romney gets "most of the Confederacy." LOL.
11:01: Patrick Stewart and Jon Stewart are the best Stewarts. (Sorry, Kristen.)
11:00 PM: Here we go! "If it ain't Brokaw, don't fix it!"
10:54 PM: Sorry, I couldn't even wait until 11. Anybody else SO ready for this? I couldn't take much more from the "real" cable news pundits. I could be hallucinating from watching nonstop coverage, but I'm certain at some point I saw James Carville perform voodoo and Sarah Palin animorphed into a cast member of Jersey Couture.
[Photo credit: Paul Morigi/Getty Images]
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In a post-Harry Potter Avatar and Lord of the Rings world the descriptors "sci-fi" and "fantasy" conjure up particular imagery and ideas. The Hunger Games abolishes those expectations rooting its alternate universe in a familiar reality filled with human characters tangible environments and terrifying consequences. Computer graphics are a rarity in writer/director Gary Ross' slow-burn thriller wisely setting aside effects and big action to focus on star Jennifer Lawrence's character's emotional struggle as she embarks on the unthinkable: a 24-person death match on display for the entire nation's viewing pleasure. The final product is a gut-wrenching mature young adult fiction adaptation diffused by occasional meandering but with enough unexpected choices to keep audiences on their toes.
Panem a reconfigured post-apocalyptic America is sectioned off into 12 unique districts and ruled under an iron thumb by the oppressive leaders of The Capitol. To keep the districts producing their specific resources and prevent them from rebelling The Capitol created The Hunger Games an annual competition pitting two 18-or-under "tributes" from each district in a battle to the death. During the ritual tribute "Reaping " teenage Katniss (Lawrence) watches as her 12-year-old sister Primrose is chosen for battle—and quickly jumps to her aid becoming the first District 12 citizen to volunteer for the games. Joined by Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) a meek baker's son and the second tribute Effie the resident designer and Haymitch a former Hunger Games winner-turned-alcoholic-turned-mentor Katniss rides off to The Capitol to train and compete in the 74th Annual Hunger Games.
The greatest triumph of The Hunger Games is Ross' rich realization of the book's many worlds: District 12 is painted as a reminiscent Southern mining town haunting and vibrant; The Capitol is a utopian metropolis obsessed with design and flair; and The Hunger Games battleground is a sprawling forest peppered with Truman Show-esque additions that remind you it's all being controlled by overseers. The small-scale production value adds to the character-first approach and even when the story segues to larger arenas like a tickertape parade in The Capitol's grand Avenue of Tributes hall it's all about Katniss.
For fans the script hits every beat a nearly note-for-note interpretation of author Suzanne Collins' original novel—but those unfamiliar shouldn't worry about missing anything. Ross knows his way around a sharp screenplay (he's the writer of Big Pleasantville and Seabiscuit) and he's comfortable dropping us right into the action. His characters are equally as colorful as Panem Harrelson sticking out as the former tribute enlivened by the chance to coach winners. He's funny he's discreet he's shaded—a quality all the cast members share. As a director Ross employs a distinct often-grating perspective. His shaky cam style emphasizes the reality of the story but in fight scenarios—and even simple establishing shots of District 12's goings-on—the details are lost in motion blur.
But the dread of the scenario is enough to make Hunger Games an engrossing blockbuster. The lead-up to the actual competition is an uncomfortable and biting satire of reality television sports and everything that commands an audience in modern society. Katniss' brooding friend Gale tells her before she departs "What if nobody watched?" speculating that carnage might end if people could turn away. Unfortunately they can't—forcing Katniss and Peeta to become "stars" of the Hunger Games. The duo are pushed to gussy themselves up put on a show and play up their romance for better ratings. Lawrence channels her reserved Academy Award-nominated Winter's Bone character to inhabit Katniss' frustration with the system. She's great at hunting but she doesn't want to kill. She's compassionate and considerate but has no interest in bowing down to the system. She's a leader but she knows full well she's playing The Capitol's game. Even with 23 other contestants vying for the top spot—like American Idol with machetes complete with Ryan Seacrest stand-in Caesar Flickerman (the dazzling Stanley Tucci)—Katniss' greatest hurdle is internal. A brave move for a movie aimed at a young audience.
By the time the actual Games roll around (the movie clocks in at two and a half hours) there's a need to amp up the pace that never comes and The Hunger Games loses footing. Katniss' goal is to avoid the action hiding in trees and caves waiting patiently for the other tributes to off themselves—but the tactic isn't all that thrilling for those watching. Luckily Lawrence Hutcherson and the ensemble of young actors still deliver when they cross paths and particular beats pack all the punch an all-out deathwatch should. PG-13 be damned the film doesn't skimp on the bloodshed even when it comes to killing off children. The Hunger Games bites off a lot for the first film of a franchise and does so bravely and boldly. It may not make it to the end alive but it doesn't go down without a fight.
Bradley Cooper might seem the most obvious beneficiary of Limitless' success -- but the film's director, Neil Burger, is actually almost as in-demand as its star, and his schedule just got even busier.
Burger has signed on to direct an updated version of the classic (true) story of Bonnie and Clyde, just a few weeks after news of his attachment to direct a big-screen iteration of the video game Uncharted.
The filmmaker, who also helmed the highly regarded 2006 mystery The Illusionist, will be joined by Up in the Air co-writer Sheldon Turner in adapting author Jeff Guinn's book Go Down Together: The True, Untold Story of Bonnie and Clyde.
The new version is said to focus more on the not-so-glamorous truths of the famed Depression-era outlaws, a noted departure from the beloved 1967 movie starring Faye Dunaway and Warren Beatty as the titular criminals.
The much touted New York premiere of Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones will close the Tribeca Film Festival in lower Manhattan on May 12. According to Variety, Star Wars writer and director George Lucas has teamed up with the Tribeca Film Festival and the Children's Aid Society to co-host the New York premiere of the film, which open in theaters May 16. There will be a morning screening for children and families affected by Sept. 11, another for youngsters from the Children's Aid Society and a third in the afternoon to benefit the Children's Aid Society. Tickets for the afternoon screening are $500 each. Lucas told Variety, "As a father and filmmaker, it's my pleasure to offer the film in support of the children of New York City." Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones will also premiere May 12 in 10 other cities in the United States and Canada.
Five days after giving birth by caesarian in London's private Portland hospital, new mom Elizabeth Hurley has reportedly started playing house with friend Elton John. Hurley, 36, is said to be staying at the singer's 37-acre house in Old Windsor while she recovers. Sky News also reports that Hurley has asked John to be the baby Damian's godfather, but the story adds that neither side would confirm the reports.
Hunk George Clooney has reportedly dumped his Canadian girlfriend, actress Maria Bertrand, for former porn star Krista Allen. According to Sky News, Clooney threw a birthday party for Allen at a Los Angeles restaurant last week. Allen played Jenna on the Baywatch TV series and in the 1994 Emmanuelle adult entertainment series, she showed a group of aliens the art of making love. If you liked this series, we also recommend Beach Babes from Beyond.
Actor/rapper Will Smith and his brother, Michael Peck, are working on a proposal to build a 500-room minority-owned hotel in Broward County, Fla., The Associated Press reports. The project has been stalled since the county cut its ties with the hotel's developer, but Smith and Peck's firm, Treyball Developments, could to take over the project without any money from the county. Treyball Developments was also involved with a hotel project in Smith's hometown of Philadelphia.
Actress Nona Gaye, who starred alongside Will Smith in Ali, will portray the character Zee in the Matrix sequel The Matrix Reloaded, Variety reports. Late singer/actress Aaliyah, who was killed in a plane crash last August, had originally been cast in the role. Zee's character will be introduced in the second film and will segue into the third installment, The Matrix Revolutions. Gaye, the daughter of Marvin Gaye, will begin shooting in Sydney, Australia, next week, joining stars Keanu Reeves, Carrie-Anne Moss and Laurence Fishburne.
Mark Wahlberg will be starring in a remake of the 1969 caper The Italian Job by director F. Gary Gray. While the original picture centered on a gold heist set entirely in Europe, the modern version will begin in Italy with the robbery taking place in Los Angeles. According to Variety, Wahlberg will play career criminal Charlie Croker, who masterminds the robbery by creating L.A.'s largest traffic jam. Shooting begins Aug. 3 at Paramount Pictures.
NBC has pulled out the big guns in the brutal battle for Nielsen's May ratings sweeps and the 2001-02 season crown. The network confirmed that it will air its two-hour reunion special The Cosby Show: A Look Back from 9 to 11 p.m. on May 19, Variety reports. The show will be up against Fox's two-hour The X-Files series finale, ABC's The Practice two-hour season ender and CBS' three-hour wrap of Survivor: Marquesas. Nielsen's sweeps numbers help local affiliates set ad rates for the next few months, compelling networks to schedule their biggest programs during the November, February and May sweeps.
Tricon Global Restaurants Inc., who own the Pizza Hut, KFC and Taco Bell restaurant chains, is the latest to follow the lead of Burger King and Office Depot and pull ads from FX's cop show The Shield. The show's lead character is a corrupt Los Angeles detective who plays as dirty as the crooks, drug dealers and murderers he busts. The show has been criticized for its vulgarity.
A controversial exhibit featuring nude paintings of Madonna was unveiled Wednesday at the Maclaurin Art Gallery, a small gallery in Scotland. Artist Peter Howson's new collection features 10 portraits of Madonna, some of them of the pop icon in the nude. Although Madonna is a fan of Howson's and previously posed for the artist clothed, these works are drawn from the artists' imagination. Howson told the BBC he was disappointed that Madonna had not given him her reaction to the paintings.
Grammy-winning rapper Eminem, whose real name is Marshall Mathers, has settled a lawsuit brought against him by John Guerra, the man he allegedly assaulted for kissing his former wife Kimberly Mathers. The incident took place outside the Hot Rock Sports Bar and Music Café in Warren, Mich., in June 2000. Although neither party has admitted to any liability or wrongdoing in the settlement, both agreed that Eminem would pay Guerra $100,000 minus attorney's fees rather than take the case to trial.
Celine Dion announced she is moving to Belgium for three months to rehearse for her to the stage next year, the AP reports. In an interview on a Belgian television show, Dion said that she had found a house in La Louviere, a gritty steel town located 30 miles south of Brussels. The 33-year-old Canadian singer is set to begin appearing at Caesar' Palace's new 4,000-seat coliseum theater in Las Vegas in March 2003, and her show is scheduled to run at least three years.
VH1's annual Divas concert is moving from New York to Las Vegas, the AP reports. The concert will air live from the MGM Grand on May 23, with proceeds going to VH1's Save the Music Foundation. This year's headliners include Mary J. Blige, Celine Dion and Cher, who have performed in past Divas concerts. More performers will be announced later.
Producer and writer Louis "Deke" Heyward died April 3 of complications from pneumonia at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles at the age of 81, Variety reports. Heyward wrote more than 50 motion pictures, 3,000 radio shows and a slew of television programs and novels. In 1977, Heyward won an Emmy for the television movie The Gathering and launched the television game shows Twenty-One and Tic Tac Dough. After a career that spanned more than half a century, Heyward spent his later years teaching writing and working with underprivileged children at Camp Kilpatrick in Malibu, Calif. He is survived by his wife Sandra, two children and five grandchildren.
Let the Pokémon backlash begin.
First, there was the recall of Burger King toys over safety concerns. Then there was the Michigan man who was granted a refund by a Kmart after saying his cute, little Pikachu doll dropped the F-bomb when its circuits were punched rapidly. (To be fair, cussing when one's circuits are being rapidly punched does seem a natural response.) Anyway, the man's calling for yet another nationwide recall.
And if that weren't enough, Nintendo, the gamemaker responsible for the video craze that spawned a TV show and hit movie, is being threatened by a lawsuit from spoon-bending psychic Uri Geller.
Geller says his image (not to mention his name) is being ripped off by the evil Pokémon character called "Un-Geller" (or, as its known in Japan, "Evil-Geller"). Un-Geller, by the way, carries spoon and boasts psychic powers.
On the plus side, the character does not spout the F-word.
AN ODD COUPLING: Jack Klugman is proud and happy with his surgically enhanced -- er, asset. The 77-year-old "Odd Couple" star spills all on his penile implant in the new TV Guide.
"I'm not ashamed of that," Klugman tells the magazine. "It's a medical thing, a surgery that is done millions of times. But there's all this humorous ridiculing and silliness that goes along with it."
Fine, but the question is -- is it working?
Klugman is both married -- and dating. His marriage to ex-game-show fixture Brett Somers is still legal (although they've been legally separated since 1974). On top of that, he's dating actress Peggy Crosby. Klugman says he never divorced Somers so that he wouldn't be tempted to marry the women he sleeps with.
Says the erstwhile Oscar Madison: "I can't live with anybody."
'SOUTH PARK' ON ICE: Olympic gold medalist Brian Boitano was parodied in the musical number "What Would Brian Boitano Do?" in "South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut". Now the figure skater will eschew his usual classical repertoire to perform to the song on the NBC special "Brian Boitano: Holiday Skating Spectacular," to air Sunday at 4 p.m. EST.
No hard feelings then apparently between Boitano and the "South Park" scamps -- unless, of course, Boitano tries to kill Kenny with an ice skate.
CAREER PATH EXAMINED: No, despite tabloid reports to the contrary, Jan-Michael Vincent is still not dead.
The 1970s-era leading man ("Big Wednesday," "White Line Fever") and 1980s TV star ("Airwolf"), whose career was plundered by substance abuse and domestic-violence allegations, is now clean and sober and ready to take on a new role: grand marshal of Van Nuys, Calif.'s, New Year's Eve party.
Vincent, now 54, will be paid $4,000 for the job, a far cry from his $250,000-a-week paycheck on "Airwolf." Can he make it all the way back? Well, feathered hair did.
STEEL CITY BACKS KELLY: Gene Kelly fans may see a familiar sight in Pittsburgh next year: The city is considering a statue honoring the late actor, who was born and raised in the city and attended school there before hitting Broadway and twirling an umbrella in "Singin' in the Rain."
Y2K STARWATCH: Despite increasing Y2K jitters, some stars are still braving the millennium in front of a crowd. Will Smith will be in Washington, D.C. (with Jack Nicholson, Steven Spielberg and Warren Beatty in the crowd). Gloria Estefan ("Music of the Heart") will perform in Miami, the Eagles will play Los Angeles, Billy Joel performs in New York and Bette Midler will put on a show in Las Vegas.
But if you're holed up in the house, lacking the significant moolah to see any of these acts, fear not: You can catch the biggest of them all, Barbra Streisand, in the comfort of your own home.
Streisand, whose own Vegas concert is boasting $1,500 to $2,500 ticket prices, will appear live (from her show) on ABC on New Year's Eve -- her first singing gig on live television in more than three decades.
In return, ABC will give Babs a live feed of its millennial coverage so her audience in Las Vegas can watch various New Year's celebrations around the world. According to the New York Daily News, Streisand will show up on the tube between 12:45 and 1 a.m. EST on Jan. 1.
Provided the world doesn't end.