Hey, remember at the end of Will & Grace when their two kids met in college and fell in love? And in Scrubs where J.D. and Turk’s kids met in college and fell in love? Yeah, they’re making a movie about that only with Jason Bateman and Vince Vaughn. Is there a pun in the title? Oh, you know there is a pun in the title.
The Insane Laws will the directing debut for writer Jeremy Garelick who co-wrote Vaughn’s The Break-Up. As you can probably already guess, Vaughn and Bateman will play two best friends who do everything together up to having children at the same time. Smash cut time jump forward and what do you know, those kids are at college, meet, hook up, and then wham-bam-whoops-forgot-a-condom-thank-you-ma’am Vaughn’s daughter gets pregnant. Will their bond of friendship be able to withstand the burden of in-law-dom? Will they make up in the end? Why does Jason Bateman only do movies where he’s paired with someone else?
Production may begin this fall and if the trailer doesn’t have the title card flying in to a screeching stop I’ll eat ironic graphic tee.
Oh, Jesse Eisenberg. It’s pretty much guaranteed that I’ll watch anything you appear in because for one, you’re a funny and a great actor and two, you make me feel cooler than I have any right to feel.
The Oscar-nominated Zombieland (those two are unrelated, unfortunately) actor just attached himself to Now You See Me, a film about a group of stage magicians who rob banks on the side. There isn’t any word on if they’ll be doing actual magic or just sleight of hand illusions, but still, the thought of Eisenberg with a wand pulling a rabbit out of the hat is pretty chuckle-worthy. Also, it’s good to see that the skills he learned in 30 Minutes or Less are being put to good use. You don’t want to repeat yourself, Zuckerberg.
Sweetness! I kind of take offense to Deadline calling Bridesmaids a “sleeper” hit because I knew that besides the fact that it was written by Kristen Wiig, any time Paul Feig and Judd Apatow work together you'll get a hit. I mean, these two guys created Freaks and Geeks. They’ve got magic together. And now, they’re going to be working together again. Oh yeeeeah.
Not much is known about the new project besides the fact that it’s a love story and Feig’s been working on it for a few years. Considering that he came up with Freaks and Geeks for years and based it off his own life, comedy nerds and fans of just plain, good cinema should be really excited. No, you need to be more excited. Seriously, you’re not excited enough. Why are you still sitting? If you’re sitting, you’re not excited enough. God, you’re like a wet rag. Shame on you.
A couple months ago, Paul Greengrass' MLK Jr. biopic Memphis was canned by Universal and, well, I think we can all agree that was pretty lame; but, as they say, when your controversial film depicting MLK as a booze-chugging, chain-smoking man in decay gets canceled, keep your head up because, hey, there are always movies to be made about pirates and race cars!
According to Vulture, Greengrass is considering three films. The first is called Maersk Alabama, but you may recognize it as A Captain's Duty, which is that Tom Hanks-starring film-adaptation about the Navy SEALs' rescue of merchant-vessel captain Richard Phillips after he was captured by Somali pirates. Sony wants to start production on the film this coming fall, once Hanks becomes available.
Instead, though, Greengrass may choose another film -- one with fewer guns, but just as much male testosterone -- called Rush, a Formula One drama penned by Peter Morgan about three-time Formula One champion Niki Lauda's near-fatal 1976 racing season. During the German Grand Prix, Lauda crashed, nearly burned to death, lost his right ear and ended up in a coma. Four weeks later, he emerged back onto the scene, finished fourth at the Italian Grand Prix and would go on to win the 1976 World Driver's Champiship title. Like a boss.
Regarding that third project though, no one has any clue what it is or what it's about, and since apparently there's no type of movie that Greengrass won't consider, we'll just go ahead and assume that it's a film about pirates who strictly drive Formula One cars and nothing else. Take that, NASCAR!
If anyone else was making a movie called The Place Beyond the Pines about a motorcycle pro who takes up bank-robbing to support his family, I’d openly laugh in their face for their stupidity. But this is Derek Cianfrance we're talking about and as he showed with his amazingly dramatic film, Blue Valentine, the dude knows what he is doing. Now Bradley Cooper is joining the cast of Beyond the Pines as the cop chasing Ryan Gosling’s bank-robbing motorcyclist. Take two handsome dudes being directed by a person with more-than-competent skills and have them rob banks while riding motorcycles? I really don’t see how this is being made. It’s almost TOO MUCH.
Amy Adams joined the cast of Paul Thomas Anderson’s new movie that is totally about Scientology but not really (it used to be called The Master but that's been scrapped). She’ll be playing the wife to Phillip Seymour Hoffman's character, a man haunted by memories of WWII who creates a belief system to help him cope. So yeah, it's definitely NOT Scientology (it’s totally Scientology). These are great casting choices all around. Adams worked well with Hoffman in Doubt and she’ll go great with the other announced cast member, Friday Night Light’s Jesse Plemons. Besides, this is Paul Thomas Anderson we’re talking about. He doesn’t make bad movies.
Also, anyone else still surprised that he’s with Maya Rudolph and they have three kids together?
YES. David O. Russell has apparently left the adaptation of Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune like most sane people thought he would. Russell makes more empty promises than a late-night infomercial. I mean, this is the guy that cast Mark Wahlberg over Nathan Fillion for this guy? C’mon. And his reasoning for leaving? Creative differences. Methinks the differences went something like this:
“I want to make something that sucks” - O. Russell
“We’d rather you not.” - Studio Executives
“EXECUTIVE MEDDLING IS RUINING MY VISION OF THE STORY!!!”- O. Russell
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. We just don’t want you to make something that sucks.” - Studio Exectuives
“YOU BUNCH OF C*NTS!!!!!” - O. Russell.
Oh, to be a fly on that wall. Anyway, the good news is that Nathan Fillion has a better shot of getting the part now. The bad news? Well, there isn’t really any bad news to this story.
Oh boy! Rumors about The Dark Tower! Granted, rumors from people who should know, but rumors are still worth about as much as their weight in gold.
Anyway, Ron Howard (he who'll be sitting in the directors chair should this ever happen) has stated that even though production was halted and pushed back from its original September start date due to budgetary worries, the creative team is “thinking of” starting in early spring next year. Fantastic. At least they’re thinking about it. Much less thought has been given to much lesser films and a film series slash television series requires a lot of thinking to make it work. So good for Mr. Howard.
He also notes that Javier Bardem (the luckiest bastard in the world) hasn’t officially signed on to the project but has “a great deal of interest.” Methinks he won’t sign on because they don’t know when it will start. Just a guess though.
On The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson last night Courtney Cox talked about their shared love of the fabled children’s show. But that’s not the crazy part. The crazy part is that she gives her kids $20 for a lost tooth. $20! Man, I guess that Friends’ money is still pouring in.
Meanwhile on Leno, Demetri Martin gave a fairly boring interview (what would you expect with Leno?) but he manages to save it at the end with a picture of Meredith Viera.
Then on Conan Topher Grace tells about a prank he did at Disney. Is it just me or does Topher come off as kind of a dick in this? Just a theory, needs more research.
Melissa McCarthy was also on Conan last night and she confirms what most of us would do if we saw Conan walking past us. Thrust the pelvis, every time.
Now this is turning out to be quite the cast for Dark Shadows. Tim Burton, aside for hiring his usual cohorts Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter, has managed to round up Johnny Lee Miller as well as the previously reported Chloe Moretz, Jackie Earle Haley, Eva Green and Michelle Pfeiffer. Not too shabby a find.
We’ve also been given the first official synopsis. I’m sincerely hoping the Burton that shows up to direct this one is the same Burton that managed to make all those classics from the 80s and 90s. The Burton that’s been hanging around since 2001 has been Tim Burtoning himself into an almost Tyler Perry-like state. Ooh, sick burn.
Read on below for the plot synopsis:
In the year 1752, Joshua and Naomi Collins, with young son Barnabas, set sail from Liverpool, England to start a new life in America. But even an ocean was not enough to escape the mysterious curse that has plagued their family. Two decades pass and Barnabas (Johnny Depp) has the world at his feet—or at least the town of Collinsport, Maine. The master of Collinwood Manor, Barnabas is rich, powerful and an inveterate playboy…until he makes the grave mistake of breaking the heart of Angelique Brouchard (Eva Green). A witch, in every sense of the word, Angelique dooms him to a fate worse than death: turning him into a vampire, and then burying him alive.
Two centuries later, Barnabas is inadvertently freed from his tomb and emerges into the very changed world of 1972. He returns to Collinwood Manor to find that his once-grand estate has fallen into ruin. The dysfunctional remnants of the Collins family have fared little better, each harboring their own dark secrets. Matriarch Elizabeth Collins Stoddard (Michelle Pfeiffer) has called upon live-in psychiatrist, Dr. Julia Hoffman (Helena Bonham Carter), to help with her family troubles.
Also residing in the manor is Elizabeth’s ne’er-do-well brother, Roger Collins (Jonny Lee Miller); her rebellious teenage daughter Carolyn Stoddard (Chloe Moretz); and Roger’s precocious 10-year-old son, David Collins (Gulliver McGrath). The mystery extends beyond the family, to caretaker Willie Loomis, played by Jackie Earle Haley, and David’s new nanny, Victoria Winters, played by Bella Heathcote.