Lindsay Lohan is expected to be released from jail either this Sunday or Monday. She will have served two weeks of her 90 day sentence. What did she do to pass the time, that was so dramatically lessened because the jails are overcrowded and because she's a celebrity and because everyone wants to make an example out of her but after they leave their judicial jobs or the correctional facility, they secretly go home and watch their DVD of Georgia Rule? Lohan's lawyer or non-lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley, visited her yesterday and told People.com that
"She's good, she's eating some Twizzlers. She looks gorgeous. ... She's writing a lot. She's creating art. She's a beautiful, talented, creative woman, and she's going to come out and surprise you all!"
The Twizzlers don't surprise me because their a half-assed candy and she's a half-assed celebrity, so of course she's not going to go straight for the Lindt. What is surprising is that in the time she's spent in jail (which is shorter than a proper game of Monopoly), it seems she has transformed into a person from who we can expect great things! Or even mediocre things! Or even just things!
Last week, Holley told Popeater,
"Lindsay is going to spend her time in jail writing new songs that she will record the second she gets out. Her emotions are so raw at the moment the material will be her best ever. It will definitely get nominated for a Grammy."
You mean we'll get another Confessions of a Broken Heart? I'll believe it when I'm hearing it but wishing I wasn't.
And you know who else is in the mood to create a little night music? Michael Lohan! Click here to hear the ballad he wrote for his troubled daughter.
Sources: MTV, MTV, TMZ
Salt the propulsive new thriller from Phillip Noyce (Clear and Present Danger Patriot Games) has been dubbed “Bourne with boobs ” but that label isn’t entirely accurate. In the role of Evelyn Salt a CIA staffer hunted by her own agency after a Russian defector fingers her in a plot to murder Russia’s president Angelina Jolie keeps her two most potent weapons holstered hidden under pantsuits and trenchcoats and the various other components of a super-spy wardrobe that proudly emphasizes function over flash.
But flash is one thing Salt never lacks for. Its breathless cat-and-mouse game hits full-throttle almost from the outset when a former KGB officer named Orlov (Daniel Olbrychski) stumbles into a CIA interrogation room and begins spilling details of a vast conspiracy. Back in the ‘70s hardline elements of the Soviet regime launched an ambitious new front in the Cold War flooding the western world with orphans trained to infiltrate the security complexes of their adopted homelands and wait patiently — decades if necessary — for the order to initiate a series of assassinations intended to trigger a devastating nuclear clash between the superpowers from which the treacherous Reds would emerge triumphant.
The Soviet Union may have long ago collapsed (or did it? Hmmm...) but its army of brainwashed killer orphan spies remains in place and if this crazy Orlov fellow is to be believed they stand poised to reignite the Cold War. It’s a preposterous — even idiotic — scheme but no more so than any of our government’s various harebrained proposals to kill Castro back in the ‘60s. As such the CIA treats it with grave seriousness even the part that that pegs Salt who just happens to be a Russian-born orphan herself as a key player in the conspiracy.
Salt bristles at the accusation but suspecting a set-up she opts to flee rather than face interrogation from her bosses Winter (Liev Schreiber) and Peabody (Chiwetel Ejiofor). A former field agent she’s been confined to a desk job since a clandestine operation in North Korea went south leaving her with a nasty shiner and a rather unremarkable German boyfriend (now her unremarkable German husband). She’s clearly kept up her training during while cubicle-bound however and in a blaze of resourceful thinking and devastating Parkour Fu she fends off a dozen or so agents of questionable competence and takes to the streets where she sets about to clear her name and unravel the Commie orphan conspiracy before the authorities can catch up with her. That is if she isn’t a part of the conspiracy.
The premise which aims to resurrect Cold War tensions and graft them onto a modern-day spy thriller is absurdly clever — and cleverly absurd. But Kurt Wimmer’s screenplay isn’t satisfied with the merely clever and absurd — it must be mind-blowing. Salt is one of those thrillers that ladles out its backstory slowly and in tiny portions every once in a while dropping a revelatory bombshell that effectively blows the lid off everything that happened beforehand. No one is who they seem and every action every gesture no matter how seemingly trivial is imbued with some kind of grand significance. The effect of piling on one insane twist after another has the effect of gradually diluting the narrative. When anything is possible nothing really matters.
But spy thrillers by definition trade in the preposterous and the principal function of the summer blockbuster is to entertain. In that regard Salt more than fulfills its charge. Noyce wisely keeps the story moving at pace that allows little time for asking uncomfortable questions or poking holes in the film’s frail plot. And he has an able partner in the infinitely versatile Jolie who having already exhibited formidable action-hero chops in Wanted and the Tomb Raider films proves remarkably adept at the spy game as well.
It’s well-known that Jolie wasn’t the first choice to star in Salt joining the project only after Tom Cruise dropped out citing the story’s growing similarities to the Mission: Impossible films. But she’s more than just a capable replacement; she’s a welcome upgrade over Cruise not least because she’s over a decade younger (and a few inches taller) than her predecessor. Should Brad Bird require a pinch-hitter for Ethan Hunt he knows where to look.
The Mean Girls star was handed the punishment by Los Angeles Judge Marsha Revel earlier this month (Jul10) for violating probation on a 2007 DUI arrest by failing to attend court-ordered alcohol education classes.
She checked into a sober living facility last week (14Jul10) on the advice of her then-legal adviser Robert Shapiro, who suggested he'd be representing the troubled actress in court.
Lohan's assistant was spotted moving her belongings out of the rehab centre, Pickford Lofts, on Monday (19Jul10) - hours before it became clear Shapiro, who once represented O.J. Simpson, would not be her lawyer.
The actress returned to Beverly Hills Superior Court on Tuesday to report to jail, accompanied by Shawn Chapman Holley, who previously quit as Lohan's legal representative. She clarified that Shapiro had never been officially appointed as her client's replacement lawyer and had simply been acting as Lohan's legal consultant.
Lohan's estranged father Michael and her mother Dina were present for the brief hearing.
Michael Lohan added to the drama in court by screaming out, "I love you Lindsay" as the actress was cuffed and led away. The Mean Girls star looked scared and serious as she was taken into custody at 8.48am local time.
The 24 year old was then transported to the Lynwood Correctional Facility, the same detention centre which housed Paris Hilton in 2007 when she was found guilty on a similar charge. Nicole Richie and Daryl Hannah have also served time behind bars there.
In a press conference staged outside the jail, Steve Whitmore, spokesman for the L.A. County Sheriff's Department, told the media, "At about 10:11 this morning, Ms. Lindsay Lohan was booked into our facility to begin her sentence. She has been extremely co-operative and everything is going smoothly.
"Ms Lohan was treated just like any other (inmate). Inside it's business as usual."
The legal expert, who has represented Michael Jackson, Winona Ryder and Chris Brown in court, insists Lohan's former attorney Shawn Chapman Holley is quite right to call foul on the actress' parole violation rap from Judge Marsha Revel - because the star didn't deserve a long spell behind bars.
Geragos tells HollyScoop.com, "I think it was more than a little bit too harsh. I think it was over the top... The idea that she got 90-days in jail plus 90-days in a rehab center for basically coming late to court and missing her weekly appointments, even though she was scheduled to finish her alcohol programme on time, is an outrage.
"I think being a celebrity caused her these problems. She would not be doing this kind of sentence... and would not have this attention drawn to her if she wasn’t a celebrity."
And Geragos fears Lohan will be subjected to the full horrors of life in jail when she begins her sentence at the Lynwood Correctional Facility in Lynwood, California on 20 July (10).
He tells the website, "The problem with jail is that if you haven’t been there... I can tell you horror story after horror story. There was a woman who told me she was raped in jail.
"The sheriffs are under-manned and the jails are overpopulated. There is no way to manage it. Its not a humane situation. If we really wanted to help her, with this system let her go to rehab or a lockdown. I don’t know why we are putting her in jail."
Lohan was ordered to serve time on Tuesday (06Jul10) after Judge Revel ruled she had violated her probation on a 2007 DUI arrest by failing to attend court-ordered alcohol education classes.
The Mean Girls star was ordered to serve time on Tuesday (06Jul10) after Judge Marsha Revel ruled she had violated her probation on a 2007 DUI arrest by failing to attend court-ordered alcohol education classes.
Lohan must surrender to a Los Angeles court on 20 July (10) and will spend the rest of the summer behind bars. After she is released, she must spend another 90 days in residential rehab.
Lohan's parents Michael and Dina have already lashed out at Judge Revel's tough decision, and the troubled actress has now echoed their sentiments in a statement issued by her lawyer Shawn Chapman Holley on Thursday (08Jul10).
The press release reads, "Ms. Lohan and I are extremely disappointed in the sentence handed down by Judge Revel. We believe that the penalty is far harsher than what others would have received under similar circumstances.
"The reality is that Ms. Lohan, like most defendants, had to balance work commitments with court requirements. To be punished so severely for doing so, particularly in light of the fact that she substantially complied with each of her probationary conditions, is harsh and unfair."
However, Holley insists her famous client is ready to face the consequences.
She adds, "Ms. Lohan is prepared to serve her jail time and to comply with the Court's orders."
The actress showed up in court in Los Angeles early on Tuesday (06Jul10) for the probation hearing, which will determine whether or not she remains free on probation.
Judge Marsha Revel told Lohan's lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley, she was unhappy that a copy of the report from the owner of the programme hadn't been passed to her.
Holley suggested there was a privacy issue, which Judge Revel rejected as staff at the treatment centre Lohan attends have no doctor-patient confidentiality.
She then ruled the paperwork be handed over to the D.A.'s office immediately, so the court could be properly informed if Lohan went to the meetings as ordered.
Judge Revel said, "All of these things are relevant to the court in determining if she is in violation (of her probation)."
The judge is the same official who insisted Lohan wear an alcohol-monitoring bracelet. The SCRAM device was set off last month (Jun10) indicating the presence of alcohol in the actress' system.
However, Judge Revel gave Lohan a lucky break when she refused to allow the prosecutor to present evidence proving the actress was drinking when the SCRAM bracelet was set off. She ruled the probation violation hearing would only concern whether or not she had attended the required number of alcohol education classes.
Meanwhile, the troubled star's father Michael Lohan has been denied a request to address the court in relation to his daughter's case.
Lohan Sr. had planned to defend Lindsay in court if the judge ruled against her, insisting the actress, who he claims has a prescription pill addiction, does not belong in prison.
So this is going to be awesome: Summit Entertainment is reportedly courting perennial bald person Bruce Willis to star as Ray Breslin in the prison escape thriller The Tomb, with Training Day director Antoine Fuqua the likely candidate to direct. Willis will play a world-renowned prison security expert who is framed and incarcerated in the unescapable stronghold he designed himself. It will take all of his knowledge of escape techniques and survival skills to break out of his own prison and hunt down the man who put him there.
OK, so that probably sounds oddly familiar to anyone who saw the first season of Fox's Prison Break, where Michael Scofield is a structural engineer who, in hopes of helping his brother break out of prison, goes to work for the designers of the prison in order to get its blueprint tattooed on his body. Or maybe I'm thinking of the Robert Schwentke thriller Flightplan, in which Jodie Foster's character must track down her kidnapped daughter while on board the plane she herself designed.
You get my point: The Tomb will probably be unabashedly derivative. But do we care? Hell no! Sure, this sounds like basically every movie Willis has ever been in - but there are a hundred reasons we keep coming back for more of his silver fox kick-assery, including, but not limited to, his ability to jump out of an eighteen-wheeler on the highway onto the back of a F-35 jet or destroy a helicopter with a police car.
The Tomb's script was written by Miles Chapman and has been rewritten by Jason Keller, while Robbie Brenner and Mark Canton are set to produce. But really, all that is relevant is that this movie is going to feature Bruce Willis doing what he does best: being a bald old badass who kills bad guys while dropping sweet one-liners. So unless The Tomb somehow turns out to be some kind of slow, understated drama, I'm going to give this one a preemptive two thumbs up.
Last month (Apr10) Michael went public with his plans to ask a judge to place Lindsay under a conservatorship, but agreed to drop his application if the Mean Girls actress meets with him for a serious discussion about her problems.
Lohan rejected her dad's request and failed to meet up on Wednesday (05May10), but now her father is planning to temporarily hold off on taking legal action, reports TMZ.com.
The website claims Michael Lohan's lawyer, Lisa Bloom, had a lengthy telephone conversation with Lindsay's legal representative, Shawn Chapman Holley, on Wednesday night (05May10) in an attempt to reach an agreement over their personal issues without the need for a conservatorship request.
The star's father is thought to be holding off on the case until 20 May (10), when Lindsay is due to have a progress hearing over the court-ordered alcohol education classes she is attending. The meetings are part of her probation after she pleaded guilty to two misdemeanour counts of cocaine use and no contest to drink-driving and reckless driving charges following a 2007 arrest.
The unnamed landlord has reportedly asked his tenant's lawyer to help him keep Michael Lohan away from his property after two separate incidents last week.
On Thursday (22Apr10), Michael Lohan raided the actress' apartment with police in a bid to check on his youngest daughter Ali's welfare, and he turned up again on Saturday (24Apr10), according to the landlord, and caused a commotion when he was asked to leave.
The property owner has since contacted Lindsay's lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley, and asked for her help in keeping Michael away.
Holley tells TMZ.com, "In light of the landlord's concerns, I may go to court to keep Michael away."
This news comes as Lindsay and her sister, who lives with the Mean Girls star, prepare to file their own restraining orders against their father.
Police visited the Mean Girls star on Wednesday (21Apr10) to question her about the $35,000 (£23,000) Rolex, which reportedly belonged to one of her acquaintances.
The friend is said to have left the timepiece at Lohan's Los Angeles home earlier this year (10) but never got it back.
Lohan allegedly told cops she is not responsible for the missing watch, but TMZ.com claims she is a suspect in the investigation.
Her lawyer Shawn Chapman Holley tells the website, "The allegations are completely untrue."
It's the latest drama to unfold in Lohan's life - on Thursday (22Apr10), the actress' dad Michael led a raid on her apartment in a desperate bid to convince her to seek help for alleged substance abuse issues.