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The 13 remaining ladies head to Seoul, South Korea – home of “gangnam style” if you need a cultural touch point. Clare is nervous because she doesn’t own a kimono (wrong country, ace) and the other girls are just pleased as pie.Group Date 1: Dirty PopThe date card reads “pop” so the girls get to speculating. Are they “making popcorn?” “Chewing bubble gum?” Oy. Chelsie, Cassandra, Elise, Danielle, Kat and Nikki are taught some serious k-pop moves (get it now?) by “21,” a girl group as hot as the Spice Girls, according to Juan Pablo's timely reference. Outfitted in their best Harajuku fashions, the ladies perform with the group at a MALL! The girls hate on Kat Daddy cause she busts the best moves. At the after-party, Nikki is the next to go pop. “You can’t get what you want by being fake,” she remarks about one of the blondes. Clearly she’s never watched this show before. Then Kat jumps up a few ranks when she tells Juan Pablo that her father was an alcoholic who never paid child support which is Latin music to his ears. Later, Elise breaks the cardinal Bachelor rule by squealing to Pabs about how Nikki will be an unfit mother. Silly little rat. You just signed your death certificate. Even so, JP does ask Nikki how she feels about kids. Her response? “I’m great at changing diapers!” And that ladies and gentleman gets her the group date rose.The Date with Sharleen a.k.a Juan Pablo’s favorite (seriously, he said that):The two embark on your classic foreign market escapade. The one where she wears her coolest high-waisted shorts with tights and together they mock the local culture while pointing out all the icky indigenous foods. “I would absolutely love to fall in love, but I don’t know if he’s the one for me,” she contemplates while eyeing a pig snout.Next they’re on to a tea house where Sharleen whispers sweet nothings to Juan Pablo like “you’re not bland.” And finally, the moment we’ve all been waiting for: Miss “I don’t want the early stages of my relationship to have anything to do with the fact that I’m an opera singer” belts for her supper. After the awkward serenade, the dominatrix and the out-of-shape soccer star make out. “We have so much in common,” he says. I guess he means because she once lived in Germany and he can barely speak English? Here’s one thing they don’t agree on: Sharleen has no interest in kids. She gets a rose anyway for her “honesty” (read: Juan Pablo wants to have lots of “classy” sex with her).The Worst Group Date Ever:The outing kicks off with some sober karaoke in what appears to be a Victorian doll house, followed by a trip to a “spa” where the ladies plunge their feet into a bath of fish hungry for their dead skin cells. Next up, the women are force-fed fried octopus. Clare freaks out beause she's obviously never been to an Italian resturant before. “I know she's swallowed bigger things than that," Kelly says. I have no idea what that means but I’m pretty sure it’s about boy parts. At the cocktail party, Juan Pablo becomes a born-again kissing virgin. Though he’s smooched six chicks, he decided that kissing a 7th would set a bad example for his daughter (she’s really good at math). He rejects Rene (who is a consummate pro) and Lauren (who loses it). He does however kiss Clare, after shoving a cookie in her mouth because “she’s hot, her teeth ... her lips” (his words, not mine). Good on you, girl. Seconds after telling JP you threw up in your mouth and swallowed it back down, he’s still compelled to taste you. Why? Because she initiated the moratorium on kissing last week and girls who play hard to get are irresistible. Why don't any of these sensible girls seem to get that?The rose ceremony:Even the ever-so-dramatic Korean drums can’t save this episode from being the most boring to date. We conclude:Lauren is booted (no surprise) and so is Elise, because snitches gotta go.The Chosen Ones: Rene, Chelsie, Kelly, Danielle, Cassandra, Allison, Clare, and KatSee you in Nam!
Seth MacFarlane: writer, director, producer, Oscars host, and now, novelist. The Family Guy creator announced that he has written a novel based on the screenplay for his upcoming film, A Million Ways to Die in the West, and will release it in March, two months before the film hits theaters in May. The book will tell the story of Albert Stark, a sheep farmer who spends most of his time attempting to avoid the overwhelming dangers that fill the wild west in order to survive, until his girlfriend leaves him, and "Albert decides to fight back—even though he can’t shoot, ride, or throw a punch. Fortunately, he teams up with a beautiful gunslinger who’s tough enough for the both of them. Unfortunately, she’s married to the biggest, meanest, most jealous badass on the frontier. Turns out Albert has just discovered a million and one ways to die in the West."
Turning the film into a novel is an unusual choice, since MacFarlane's comedic style tends to rely on rapid-fire jokes and visual gags that may be difficult for him to translate from the screen into print. Since he wrote the novelization himself, it's very likely that those jokes will have made it into the book, but the story will need to have a little bit of depth or character development in order to work properly as a novel. However, turning the film into a novel could be a good sign, as it can be taken as an indication that the film has a lot more to it than just an endless stream of jokes. There's been no indication thus far that MacFarlane has added material for the novel, which means we all might need to get excited about A Million Ways to Die in the West.
But as weird as it might seem to read a novel from the same guy who wrote Family Guy or Ted, A Million Ways to Die in the West is not the strangest or most surprising film novelization out there. We've rounded up 12 of the weirdest ones, and ranked them in order of insanity. Looks like MacFarlane has a lot to live up to with this project.
12. Pretty In Pink If you've ever watched the classic 1986 film and wished that Andie had chosen her dorky, loyal best friend Duckie over rich kid Blaine at the end, we may have the perfect solution for you. The novelization of the film sticks with the original ending, and allows Duckie to live the dream of every awkward, poorly-dressed high school guy and win the girl of his dreams away from the obnoxious kid with good hair and a nice car. The downside, though, is that unlike the screenplay, it isn't written by John Hughes, which means it likely lacks some of the wit and heart that characterizes his film. But that's a small price to pay to watch the nerd emerge victorious.
11. Kazaam Remember when Shaquille O'Neal decided to try his hand at acting in the late 1990s, and the world was gifted with Kazaam? Well, it should come as no surprise to you, then, that movie executives realized that school children all across the country would buy anything with O'Neal's face on it, and churned out a novelization of the film in order to sell it at book fairs. Unlike most film novelizations, there are no significant changes or additions to the book, probably because there is very little that can be done to that script in order to make it worth reading, but that didn't stop it from flying off the shelves of every elementary school library around.
10. Great Expectations Long before he stranded Sandra Bullock in space, Alfonso Cuaron directed an adaptation of Great Expectations starring Ethan Hawke and Gwyneth Paltrow. Then, someone adapted that adaptation into a novel that is even more "loosely" based on the Dickens classic. Although both the film and the novel make a lot of interesting and strange changes in order to modernize the story, the most inexplicable decision comes from author Deborah Chiel, who changed the name of the protagonist to Johnny from Fin (itself a change from the original name, Pip.) Dickens likely turned over in his grave when this hit bookshelves.
9. Crossroads The 2002 film Crossroads was notable not for its script, acting or cinematography but simply for the fact that it was the acting debut of pop princess Britney Spears. Which makes it even more surprising that someone would turn the film into a novel, as it then loses the one thing that made it worth talking about. Sure, Spears' face is on the cover, but the only reason to see the film was to watch her attempt to transition into a film career, and then sing along every time one of her songs played on the soundtrack. The book even takes away the joy that comes with watching Dan Akyroyd act in a Britney Spears film. It's all plot and no fun.
8. The Cabin in the Woods Co-written by Joss Whedon, this 2012 film was designed as a way to "revitalize the slasher film," and featured a surprise twist that thrilled fans and critics alike. But in case you're uncomfortable with too much gore, or you just never got to catch the film in theaters, there's a novelization of the film available so that you can still talk about the film without having to watch people get decapitated. It's the best of both worlds!
7. Mortal Kombat If there's one thing that old-school video games lacked, it's a strong sense of plot and character development. Jeff Rovin has remedied that by turning the video game Mortal Kombat into a novel, although he cut out most of the fighting in favor of backstory and long explanations of how the character came to be the super-powered fighting machines that they are. Which is cool if you're a hard-core fan, but let's be real, here: the only reason anyone was interested in Mortal Kombat was the fighting. Without that, what's the point?
6. John Carter John Carter is the story of a Civil War captain who gets transported to Mars after he dies, and leads a Martian army to save the princess. With it's mix of sci-fi and action, it makes sense that movie executives would want to turn the film into a novel; what doesn't make sense, though, is why they would choose to publish it alongside A Princess of Mars, the original Edgar Rice Burroughs story that it is based on, especially when the film famously failed to live up to its source material. You would think that the last thing they would want to do is draw attention to the ways the stories differed.
5. Paradise AlleyThis is a novelization of a film that was written and directed by Sylvester Stallone, adapted by Stallone himself, which makes it worthy of this list. You can actually own a book authored by the guy who played Rocky Balboa. What a time to be alive.
4. Spaceballs For some reason, Mel Brooks seem to think that his film Spaceballs would make an excellent children's book - which is not a thought that anyone who has ever seen Spaceballs shares. However, Brooks ignored everyone else, and the novelization was published, and sold to students in elementary schools across the country through Scholastic Book catalogs and school book fairs. Of course, they made sure to edit the content down to a more child-friendly nature, but anyone who's buying a Sapceballs book is probably not a child.
3. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective and Ace Ventura 2: When Nature Calls Everything that makes Ace Ventura work as a film is everything that makes it fail as a novel. The humor relies so heavily on Jim Carrey's physicality and line delivery, that without the visual element, all that's left are descriptions of the weird gags that take place in the film, which isn't fun or funny for anybody who reads these.
2. The Cat in the Hat No, we didn't make a mistake. Someone actually thought it was a good idea to turn the Mike Myers film into a novel, despite the fact that there is a book that already exists that is better written and more fun to read than the movie itself. When it comes to a showdown between the original Cat in the Hat and any kind of pale imitation, Dr. Suess will always walk away the winner. There's a reason it's become a classic, and it has nothing to do with Myers.
1. Howard the Duck Nobody who has ever watched Howard the Duck has wished that the story lasted longer. Nobody. But the strangest thing about this novelization isn't the fact that it exists in the first place, but the fact that it is widely regarded to be better than its source material, and even adds extra layers of depth and humor to the characters and story that appears onscreen. That's right: Howard the Duck has hidden layers. Who'd have known?
Hip-hop star Drake returned to his acting roots this weekend (18Jan14) as he showed off his best impressions of rap mentor Lil Wayne and embattled baseball ace Alex Rodriguez on hit U.S. sketch comedy show Saturday Night Live. The Best I Ever Had hitmaker served as this week's guest host and he pulled on a series of different wigs and costumes as he portrayed a geeky teenager, a dorky dad at a slumber party, and an energetic Disney World employee in an Indiana Jones stunt-show-gone-wrong.
However, the highlights saw Drake spoofing a number of famous faces - he kicked off the show portraying suspended New York Yankees player Rodriguez as he was quizzed about his steroids scandal by Taran Killam, posing as British CNN newsman Piers Morgan. The segment also featured Kate McKinnon's impersonation of Justin Bieber, who had to fend off questions about his recent 'egging' vandalism controversy.
Drake also donned fake dreadlocks and facial tattoos to spoof his label boss Lil Wayne in a segment titled, Hip Hop Classics: Before They Were Stars, portraying him as the original Steve Urkel character in the popular sitcom Family Matters.
He also poked fun at his time on Canadian high school drama Degrassi: The Next Generation, where he got his start in the entertainment business, and played off his black and Jewish roots by reliving his Bar Mitzvah and rhyming about celebrating Hanukkah and dating a "Rihannukuh" - a reference to his brief romance with sexy singer Rihanna.
Drake also took on double duty by appearing as the show's musical guest, performing tracks including Started From the Bottom, Trophies, Hold On, We're Going Home and From Time with R&B newcomer Jhene Aiko.
Captain Phillips director Paul Greengrass is to receive the top prize at the 2014 American Cinema Editors' (ACE) Eddie Awards. Greengrass missed out on an Oscar nod for Best Director when the Academy Awards shortlist was announced on Thursday morning (16Jan14), but he still has reason to celebrate after being named as the honouree of the prestigious Golden Eddie Filmmaker of the Year accolade.
A statement released by the ACE Board of Directors reads: "Paul Greengrass is one of the most exciting filmmakers working in cinema today. A Greengrass film simply has its own signature - from the magnificent hand-held camera work, to his ability to engage audiences with riveting storytelling, his canon of work is bold and iconic...
"It is our pleasure to recognize him with the ACE Golden Eddie Filmmaker of the Year honor for his ongoing contribution to filmmaking at its finest."
Greengrass follows in the footsteps of previous Golden Eddie recipients Quentin Tarantino, James Cameron, Clint Eastwood and Steven Spielberg, who picked up the accolade last year (13).
Captain Phillips' leading man, Tom Hanks, was also among the big names snubbed by Oscars voters, but his co-star, former taxi driver Barkhad Abdi, scored a nomination for Actor in a Supporting Role.
A representative for Irina Shayk has blamed an inaccurate language translation for sparking reports suggesting the Russian supermodel had secretly wed Portuguese soccer ace Cristiano Ronaldo. The Real Madrid star was accepting the prestigious FIFA Ballon d'Or award in Zurich, Switzerland on Monday (13Jan14), when the World Player of the Year honouree gave thanks to his colleagues, friends and family.
He delivered his emotional speech in Portuguese and was translated as saying, "I am very happy, it is very difficult to win this award.
"Everybody that has been involved with me on a personal level I have to thank. My wife, my friends, my son. It is a tremendously emotional moment."
However, Shayk's spokesperson has dismissed claims of a surprise wedding, insisting, "The translator just changed it (girlfriend) to wife."
Shayk accompanied her boyfriend of four years and his son from a previous relationship, Cristiano, Jr., to the ceremony, and the beauty later gushed about Ronaldo's win with a photo of the couple on her Facebook.com page, alongside the caption, "Couldn't be more proud."
Actor and funnyman Steve Coogan took the Golden Globes stage with Philomena Lee, the woman behind his new movie Philomena, to introduce the film as a Best Motion Picture (Drama) contender. The Irishwoman said, "The film isn't just about me; it's the shared story of the women who have yet to receive the justice they deserve." Coogan's film chronicles Lee's battle to locate the son she was forced to give up for adoption. Another non-Hollywood celebrity to take to the stage at the Globes was race ace Niki Lauda, who presented Rush, a movie about his track contest with the late James Hunt, as a Best Film contender with Chris Hemsworth.
Gravity director Alfonso Cuaron and filmmaking brothers Joel and Ethan Coen have each landed nominations for the American Cinema Editors' (ACE) Eddie Awards. Cuaron's behind-the-scenes work on his space disaster movie has earned the Mexican a nod for Best Edited Feature Film (Dramatic), alongside 12 Years a Slave's Joe Walker, Chris Rouse for Captain Phillips, Saving Mr. Banks' Mark Livolsi, and Eric Zumbrunnen and Jeff Buchanan for Her.
Meanwhile, the Coen brothers have scored a mention in the Comedy or Musical category under their moniker Roderick Jaynes for Inside Llewyn Davis. They will compete against American Hustle's Jay Cassidy, Crispin Struthers and Alan Baumgarten, August: Osage County's Stephen Mirrione, Kevin Tent for Nebraska, and Thelma Schoonmaker for The Wolf of Wall Street.
The nominations will give Gravity and Inside Llewyn Davis big Oscars boosts - the winner of either the dramatic or comedy/musical film Eddie categories have gone on to claim the Oscar for Best Picture in seven of the past 11 Eddie Awards shows, while the Eddie victor in the best edited dramatic feature shortlist has gone on to win the Academy Award for editing in nine of the past 11 years.
The 64th annual ACE Eddie Awards will take place in at the Beverly Hilton in California on 7 February (14).
Actress Gabrielle Union has opened up about her 2013 split from new fiance Dwyane Wade, revealing she was trying to do too much at once - and her relationship suffered. The 41-year-old star tells Glamour magazine that she has recommitted herself to the basketball ace after briefly putting her career first.
She explains, "(We split) because of distance and scheduling. I finished filming the show (Being Mary Jane), then I flew to Vegas right away to start shooting (film) Think Like a Man Too. I couldn't take time off, and I missed some quality togetherness we desperately needed.
"Over the summer, I reassessed priorities. I'd always wanted an awesome career with back-to-back projects, but I realised I wasn't willing to sacrifice my relationship for it. Moving forward, I decided my work schedule has to make sense for our family.
"If your relationship isn't something you're willing to give up and you can compromise, do so."
During the break, Wade fathered a child with another woman. Union has yet to address the baby story, which her fiance has confirmed, but reports suggest she was well aware of the child when she accepted the sportsman's proposal just before Christmas (13).
Former tennis ace Lindsay Davenport is a mum again - the retired sportswoman gave birth to her fourth child on Monday (06Jan14). Davenport has announced the happy news on Twitter.com, stating she's "thrilled" to have a new baby.
The court star and her husband Jonathan Leach have named their daughter Haven Michelle Leach.
Their other children are Kaya Emory, two, Lauren, four, and big brother Jagger Jonathan, six.
Former basketball star Dennis Rodman channelled the spirit of Marilyn Monroe by singing a breathless version of Happy Birthday to North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un on Wednesday (08Jan14). The retired sports ace struck up a bizarre friendship with the controversial dictator during a visit to the country last year (13) and he was back in the Asian nation this week (beg06Jan14) as part of his ongoing project to promote basketball among schoolchildren.
He took to an indoor court in the capital Pyongyang with fellow former professionals including Vin Baker, Kenny Anderson, and Charles D. Smith for a profile-raising game in front of local dignitaries on Wednesday, and before the event began, Rodman had a special gift for Jong-Un.
He stood in front of a microphone and sang one verse of Happy Birthday, imitating the infamous vocal delivery of Monroe when she performed the same stunt for U.S. President John F. Kennedy in 1962.
As Rodman sang, Jong-Un was seen smiling before applauding the sportsman's efforts.
However, not everyone was impressed with the performance - after the game ended, Rodman's pal Smith told reporters, "We always tell Dennis that he can't sing. He is tone deaf."