Chubby Checker Won’t Be Dicked Around By Penis-Measuring App

Chubby Checker sues HP over lewd appLegendary musician Chubby Checker (née Ernest Evans) has got his undies in a twist over a little app that claims to guess the size of a man’s penis. According to the Guardian, the rock and roller is suing Hewlett-Packard and Palm, Inc. for naming its penis-measuring app for the webOS platform the — you guessed it — Chubby Checker. 

The Chubby Checker (penis app, not singer) hasn’t been available since September 2012, but Checker (I’m talking about the musician this time) doesn’t care. Checker’s lawyer, Willie Gary, explains in a press release that his client is seeking half a billion dollars for “irreparable damage and harm” in order to “preserve the integrity and legacy of a man who has spent years working hard at his musical craft and has earned the position of one of the greatest musical entertainers of all time.” 

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Sounds fair enough. But the real question is, how does the app work? An old listing reads as follows:

“Any of you ladies out there just start seeing someone new and wondering what the size of there member is. Well now you can right now from your phone. All you need to do is find out the man’s shoe size and plug it in and don’t worry where your from because The Chubby Checker supports shoe measurements of different regions and types. Now with The Chubby Checker there is no need for disappointment or surprise…”

I don’t know about you, but this certainly sounds like a legitimate mobile device application to us. 

Follow Abbey on Twitter @AbbeyStone

[Photo Credit: Maria Laura Antonelli/Rex USA]