Daily Shuffle: Lindsay Lohan Stops Partying

lindsay lohanLindsay Lohan told her friends that she’s “completely over the club scene,” and that she won’t even go out anymore because she’s risking her sobriety when she does. She also said she’s distancing herself away from the people she used to go out with, AND she’s also done with the people who would just use her for her money. She’s not going to turn into one of those people that has a bird clock in her kitchen, is she? – TMZ

Instead of making music, Jessica Simpson now does things like tweet, “Thank you Lord for blessing me with a Man that has the perfect Tush. Laying my hands upon it with peace :)” And People ACTUALLY has an article about how many times she’s done this. – People

People are really pissed George Clooney said he will never get married again, even though he’s been dating Elisabetta Canalis since 2009. Chances are Elisabetta doesn’t care because YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE MARRIED TO GET PREGNANT. (But don’t worry Mom, yes you do!) – US

Jaime Pressly and her husband, Simran Singh, have split up. She also owes $600,000 in back taxes and there was also that DUI thing, so… – Radar