Let’s see…how can I put the severity of “ED WESTWICK MIGHT LEAVE GOSSIP GIRL” into terms that all you losers who watch The Big Bang Theory will understand. How about if I said, “Gossip Girl without Ed Westwick would be like a Stew Leonard’s that didn’t have rapists dressed in chicken and cow suits standing outside in the parking lot.” Eh, that’s okay. But I can do better with…”Gossip Girl without Ed Westwick would be like a commercial for Perdue Chicken Breasts that didn’t have Jim Perdue telling puppet chickens that they’re on a diet of no preservatives and they need to lay off the fucking Skittles.” That’s pretty good, but let me give it one last shot: “Gossip Girl without Ed Westwick would be like a campaign on saving the environment that didn’t have Al Gore involved.” Yeah, EXACTLY. Without Al Gore, there’d be nobody petitioning for us to stop going out to dinner on Saturday nights so we can afford some crazy expensive light bulbs that will increase the chances of some breed of lizard finding a mate in the rainforest, so, hopefully that last one conveys the severity of the situation we find ourselves in this morning.
As for where I came across this information, it was from The Hollywood Reporter, who should be credited with relieving us from the burden of sifting through nonsensical British media outlets for stories like this one that will impact our lives so swiftly. Apparently, Westwick told Tatler magazine that he’s “ready to do something else” and that he finds playing Chuck Bass boring now. I’d like to know what he’s got lined up for himself, BECAUSE UNLESS IT’S HOSTING GIG ON TODDLERS AND TIARAS OR HOARDERS (aren’t British people crazy neat and have ironing boards built into their walls?), it is of no interest to me.
Source: The Hollywood Reporter