Earlier this summer, entertainment outlets splashed the news of the Winklevoss twins dropping $18 Million on a mega mansion in Los Angeles. Let’s just think this through, okay?
So, Cameron and Tyler (they do have first names, really) go house shopping together, settle on a winner, and BOOM, out come the checkbook(s)? The news was reported so matter-of-factly: “Winklevoss Twins Buy Home Together.” Why, oh WHY would they be doing this at their age? Why is this something that these grown, 31-year-old men are doing together? What will they do there in that big house, just the two of them? Did they sit there with their joint checking account and gelled hair and sign checks side-by-side dreaming of nights in their spacious his and his bathroom?
Of course, famous pairs do tend to have a close bond many of us are fascinated with, but cannot comprehend. We’ve seen famous celebs do everything together: Dress the same. Talk the same. Have the same hobbies. The Olsen twins will always be The Olsen Twins for as long as Full House reruns are streaming and Holiday in the Sun is sold at Target, no matter how many times Mary-Kate dyes her hair or Ashley masks her body with layers of black on black on black. The Ryans, of Rob and Rex (alliteration, get it?), will always be the eccentric twins who both coach NFL teams, even if Rex had his stomach stapled and now looks half his brother’s size. There’s no hiding that signature goofy expression, Rex, as long as both your faces are zoomed-in on HD screens. And then there’s the Mowry sisters — Tia and Tamera forever and always starring in grade-B television shows together — who have just plain given up on trying to be anything but the same. exact. person. Now it seems the Winklevii are the latest pair to have us bewildered — especially since, unlike the Olsens and Mowrys, their closeness has nothing to do with marketability.
Not that they haven’t tried to use their twindom for cash. Remember that Wonderful Pistachios commercial where the twins really showed Mark Zuckerberg who’s boss by cracking some nuts for a no-name brand? (When the Mowrys made a cameo in this vintage Doublemint gum commercial, at least the premise was based on twins.)
A few weeks ago, the Winklevoss bros were spotted in N.Y.C. securing a five-year lease on an apartment, where they’ll be working on their newest venture. Media outlets and techies picked up the story, only not in the way you’d expect. TechSinner made Brew Media Relations founder Brooke Hammerling’s tweet a highlight in their article: “Spotted on 16th street: the Winklevii. They travel together. In white button downs. I may have shouted “Team Zuckerberg” #sorrynotsorry”. When they celebrated their birthday in August, the New York Post splashed “Kosher Times Two” describing their soiree at Menachem Senderowicz and Henry Stimler’s kosher restaurant, Jezebel. (Side note: at what point, as a twin, do you discontinue the ritual of joint birthday parties? Is the answer “never”?) And how can we forget when The Simpsons spoofed the Greek God-like creatures rowing? I mean, even Guest of a Guest has been snapping the pair, their identical frames sandwiching ladies that come their way. Because God forbid the two are separated, even for a woman. Let’s pause for a moment on that note. A quick Google search of just one of the brothers is a rarity in itself. You get almost as many Mark Zuckerberg portraits as solo Cameron shots. Oh the irony!
And it seems they only fuel the fire. Stu Woo of The Wall Street Journal met with the duo to learn about Olympic-level rowing. As they stood around in matching outfits, Woo asked, “How am I supposed to tell the difference between you guys?” One of them (they really do need to wear name tags) explained that he is left-handed and his brother is a righty. A confused Woo replied, “Is that the only thing?” It was all either of them could think of. Even the description on Cameron’s Twitter handle (@winklevoss) reads: “I’m 6’5, 220 and there’s two of me. Olympian, ConnectU Co-Founder, Entrepreneur, half of the Winklevoss Twins.” Tyler’s is similar (who currently boasts 81 more followers than his counterpart).
Is it possible they know that this is the only way we’d be interested in them — and therefore, their business? Seriously, if they weren’t twins, would we want to read about just Cameron buying a home or watch only Tyler eating a pistachio? (Aside from this gem.) My non-authoritative guess is a bold no. With that, I still dare them to channel Gisele Bündchen, Scarlett Johansson, Alanis Morissette, and Kiefer Sutherland — even if just for a moment — all of whom have successfully lead a life keeping their (apparently less important) twins hidden in dark closets, nowhere to be found.