Unhappy Hour: ‘American Idol’ Makes a Devastating Change, Gatsby’s Mistake & More Pop Culture Headaches

 Credit: Frank Micelotta / FOX

Every week, Hollywood gives us something to whine about, and the week of May 6 was no different. We could make a drinking game out of this week, but that would be too dangerous. Instead, we’ll stick to the usual formula: varying levels of alcoholic respite depending on how bothersome the week’s issues are. Is your biggest complaint this week a flimsy one? How about a light cocktail to take the edge off? Got a real bone to pick with a celeb or entertainment entity this week? Go ahead, grab a drink that’ll put hair on your chest. Here are the week’s entertainment stories that are forcing us to seek a bubbly or boozy refuge. And maybe an idea or two about how you should wash them down.

Lighten Up With a Mint Julep

Randy Jackson is leaving American Idol, further cementing the show’s descent into pop culture past. 

We actually love Anne Hathaway’s loud blonde ‘do. She stepped out with her new locks at the Met Gala on Monday.

We’re jealous we didn’t come up with this Ryan Gosling Meme. But we’re pretty proud of finding it. 

Manti Te’o’s fake girlfriend is hotter than we are, at least according to the Maxim Hot 100.

We have mixed feelings about the public’s reaction to Charles Ramsey. Especially this auto-tune of his heroic interview:

 

Wash This Week Down With a Gin Gimlet

Amanda Bynes is following in Lindsey Lohan’s footsteps again. This time, by getting out of her deserved punishments.

The Great Gatsby movie is missing some very important scenes from the book. And it would have been so much better if it wasn’t. 

Twitter doesn’t seem to think much of Elisha Cuthbert. They deemed her expression at her boyfriend’s hockey game a b***h face. We beg to differ.

The sexiest vampire couple ever, Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder of The Vampire Diaries (sorry, Robsten) has broken up. Perhaps Somerhalder has moved on to his true love: Grumpy cat. 

 

Hit the Harder Stuff With a Bourbon Highball

Abercrombie & Fitch doesn’t want fat customers. Or says the CEO, in a recently revealed (and reviled) statement. 

Charlie Brown goes to rehab. Or, the voice actor who played Charlie Brown goes to rehab, but it still hurts, right in the childhood memories.

We lost too many wonderful Hollywood faces this week, like Bryan Forbes, Jeanne Cooper, Ottavio Missoni, and of course, film legend Ray Harryhausen

 

Follow Kelsea on Twitter @KelseaStahler


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Celebrity Editor Kelsea Stahler was born in a pile of dirt. Okay, she was actually born in an old Naval hospital in San Diego, which then became a pile of dirt and remained as such for a number of years before becoming a parking lot perfectly sized for circus tents, and finally a museum. She eventually left San Diego to attend New York University, where she studied Journalism and English literature — two less-than profitable liberal arts degrees about which guidance counselors warned her. Against all odds, she now resides in Brooklyn, where she fights the constant fear that the locals will soon discover she isn’t quite cool enough to live there, and makes a living writing absurd, pop culture features about Batman, zombies, vampires, funny people, and Ron Swanson.

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