But Wieber should perk up as high as her ponytail — not only will she get a chance to Kerri Strug her way into winning her team Gold (hopefully sans ankle injury), but she could also boast a lucrative career in Hollywood. Doing what, you ask? Why, if horror movies have taught us anything, it’s that there’s a market for flexible possessed women.
Finalist: Psychiatric Ward Crawler, The Exorcist III (1990)
Best Event: Defying Gravity
Hobbies: Singing the full track to Wicked
Strength: Helping you remember the existence of The Exorcist III
Weakness: Appearing in The Exorcist III
Final Score: 55.32. Talk about a one-trick pony.
Finalist: Emily Rose (Jennifer Carpenter), The Exorcism of Emily Rose (2005)
Name: Emily Rose
Best Event: Rings
Hobbies: Excessive work-out sessions, crying over Lundy. Oh wait, that’s Deb Morgan.
Strength: Season 4
Weakness: Season 5
Final Score: 60.03. Julia Stiles’ terribleness really throws you off your game.
Bronze Medal: Nell Sweetzer (Ashley Bell), The Last Exorcism (2010)
Name: Nell Sweetzer
Best Event: Floor Exercise
Strength: Scaring the hell out of everyone but herself.
Final Score: 61.78. Could a scrunchie-less gymnast perform any higher?
Silver Medal: Regan MacNeil (Linda Blair), The Exorcist (1973)
Name: Regan MacNeil
Best Event: Uneven Bars
Hobbies: Board games.
Strength: Avoiding Home Alone-style paint cans.
Weakness: A warm bowl of pea soup.
Final Score: 62.5. Like Wieber, a heavy favorite who still failed to turn her head and notice the competition.
Gold Medal: Rosalita (Bonnie Morgan), The Devil Inside (2012)
Best Event: Unbalanced Beam
Hobbies: Yoga. Duh.
Weakness: Fashion sense. Capris? What is this, 2000?
Final Score: 63.00. Really, anyone else taking the title would be a stretch. (Har.)
Of course, these rankings are based on a biased judge who enjoys footage that can keep her up at night. So now, it’s your turn: Which possessed lady would get your gold medal?
&amp;amp;amp;lt;a href=”http://polldaddy.com/poll/6428037/”&amp;amp;amp;gt;Which possessed girl would you give the gold?&amp;amp;amp;lt;/a&amp;amp;amp;gt;
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