90210: AUTHORITY FIGURES
Annie’s pops, Harry (Rob Estes), is the principal of West Beverly High but, my, is he naïve about teen angst! It’s as if he’s never heard of teenagers kissin’ in a tree or teenagers in compromising positions in the school parking lot (refer to Episode 1). He kinda freaks when he runs into his daughter making out with a taller Zac Efron type and wants to talk birds ‘n’ the bees with her … at age 16. Meanwhile, we’re supposed to trust that Kelly (Jennie Garth) can counsel kids when she’s all frazzled about Dylan McKay. STILL.
How Gossip Girl Compares: The Dean of Yale is enraptured with Serena. No, not because of her low-cut silk top, but because she told him an amusing experience of being in a fashion show for fun. He writes her a handwritten letter to join him at a cocktail fete at his place, and frequently speed-dials Serena’s cell. Riiiight.
OMG-o-Meter: LOW
KEEP READING: No sex from the Lord!