My Comeback!
Despite Momma's new book insinuating that life with me is like some sort of a weather problem, I was groomed for a comeback. I went to the gym. A lot. I went to Frappuccino rehab. Then, after co-starring in MTV commercials with a big elephant in the room, I was given three moon men! (Before then, I'd been a virgin to moon men.) I was speechless. I really was. I did it with no snakes. No Madonna makeout. Just lil' ol' me.
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