Movies That Are, Surprisingly, Not Porn.

1
'Snatch'
'Snatch'
Screen Gems
‘Snatch’ – This feels like the one dudes who are really high would laugh and high five about. {Photo Credit: Screen Gems}
2
'Frankenweenie'
'Frankenweenie'
Disney
‘Frankenweenie' – Surprisingly not a gay porn movie about zombies. {Photo Credit: Disney Enterprises, Inc.}
3
'Deep Impact'
'Deep Impact'
Paramount Pictures
Though it sounds like a sequel to 'Deep Throat' (porn edition, not secret government informant), 'Deep Impact' was about a comet pounding the s**t out of Earth. {Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures}
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4
'Free Willy'
'Free Willy'
Warner Bros.
‘Free Willy’ – Sorry about ruining your childhood with the image of a giant piece of male anatomy launching itself to freedom rather than a Killer Whale. Still works with the Michael Jackson soundtrack though (too much)? {Photo Credit: Warner Brothers}
5
'Dick'
'Dick'
Sony Pictures Home Entertainment
‘Dick’ – Richard Nixon, dick... write your own joke here. {Photo Credit: Sony Pictures}
6
'The Midnight Meat Train'
'The Midnight Meat Train'
Lions Gate Entertainment/TriMark
‘The Midnight Meat Train’ – I'm sorry, but LOLOLOLOL, you guys. {Photo Credit: Lionsgate}
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7
'Holes'
'Holes'
Walt Disney/Touchstone/Hollywood Pictures
‘Holes’ – Imagine if Shia LaBeouf (renamed Shia LaBuff because, duh) went digging for something ELSE, aknowwhattamean? {Photo Credit: Walt Disney Pictures}
8
'Big'
'Big'
20th Century Fox Home Entertainment
Big’ – The story of a size queen with a heart of gold. Oh wait, no? {Photo Credit: 20th Century Fox}
9
'Hot Fuzz'
'Hot Fuzz'
Universal Pictures
‘Hot Fuzz’ – Should've starred Edward Furlong as a cop with some seriously long... ties to morality? {Photo Credit: Universal Pictures}
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10
'Blow'
'Blow'
New Line Cinema
‘Blow’ – The story of the man who started the American cocaine market should really have a porn spin-off with Johnny Depp and Penelope Cruz lookalikes. It'd be a real oral history. {Photo Credit: New Line}
11
'Shaft'
'Shaft'
Paramount Pictures
‘Shaft’ – SHUT YOUR MOUTH! (Or not? Hey-o!) {Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures}
12
'Private Parts'
'Private Parts'
Paramount Pictures
‘Private Parts’ – Howard Stern totally wishes he could've made this a porn you guys. He does. {Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures}
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13
'Big Daddy'
'Big Daddy'
Columbia
‘Big Daddy’ – I know, I know. I'm sorry. {Photo Credit: Columbia Pictures}
14
‘Anus Magillicutty’
‘Anus Magillicutty’
‘Anus Magillicutty’ – Choose your own derriere-centric plot. {Photo Credit: Corporations Unlimited}

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