We’re Nude, We’re Rude on ‘Survivor’

You know “Survivor” must be nearly over, now that the naked fat man is singing.

OK, so maybe Richard Hatch isn’t all that fat, but he’s definitely naked a lot of the time. And he’s just the latest member of the “Survivor” cast to mouth off to the media, now that the final episode (airing Wednesday) is fast approaching.

“I’m often nude, and I was in the middle of the South China Sea in 110-degree weather,” Hatch declares in the new issue of Newsweek. “Why would I have clothes on?”

Uh, well, maybe because you’re on television, Richard.

As everyone knows, Hatch is one of the four remaining “Survivor” contestants, one of whom will emerge as the $1 million winner at the end of the upcoming episode.

His unrepentant nudist comments came on the heels of more blabbing by another “Survivor” contestant, bible-thumper Dirk Been, who was interviewed on Pat Robertson’s religious TV talk show “The 700 Club” Tuesday, the day before the last “Survivor.”

In the interview, which was taped last week, Been boasted that he was kicked off the island (in the fifth week of “Survivor”) because his ardent Christian beliefs intimidated the other contestants.

“There’s no doubt,” Been said. The others banded together and concluded, “there’s real power in this guy, we don’t know what it is, but if we want to win the game, we have to get rid of him,” he surmised.

Either that, or they just thought a 24-year-old virgin is weird.