2013 Oscars Big Musical Finish: Was That It?

seth macfarlane and kristen chenoweth 

So we made it all the way to midnight, against all odds. We finished the 2013 Oscars telecast. Without falling asleep. And this year, the Academy promised us a big musical finale to send us off in high spirits. (You know, because who wants the heartwarmingly adorable sight of Ben Affleck getting so choked up he could barely muster his daughters’ names at the end of his acceptance speech for Argo’s Best Picture Oscar to be the last thing we see all night?) But when Kristin Chenoweth and Seth MacFarlane treated us to “Here’s to the Losers” (video below), complete with credits rolling over Chenoweth’s golden goose of a gown, we were all left wondering, “Was that it?”

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Yes. It actually was. All that buildup and we got a single shot on Chenoweth and MacFarlane name-listing for two minutes. There were puns! There were Bradley Cooper cheer-up attempts! And oh, were there famous people’s names! Sure, it was flashy and the tune was jaunty, but we didn’t even get a shot of the actors being joy-shamed as the show closed.

Basically, let’s just call it what it really was: classy credits music. Now excuse us as we rewatch Affleck’s speech so we can close on a truly high note.

[Photo Credit: Kevin Winter/Getty Images]

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Celebrity Editor Kelsea Stahler was born in a pile of dirt. Okay, she was actually born in an old Naval hospital in San Diego, which then became a pile of dirt and remained as such for a number of years before becoming a parking lot perfectly sized for circus tents, and finally a museum. She eventually left San Diego to attend New York University, where she studied Journalism and English literature — two less-than profitable liberal arts degrees about which guidance counselors warned her. Against all odds, she now resides in Brooklyn, where she fights the constant fear that the locals will soon discover she isn’t quite cool enough to live there, and makes a living writing absurd, pop culture features about Batman, zombies, vampires, funny people, and Ron Swanson.