Review

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo Review

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Aug 12, 2005 | 5:59am EDT

Deuce Bigalow (Rob Schneider) the fish-lovin' former gigolo with a face only a mother could love and a heart of gold is back--and living it up in Amsterdam. But it isn't all fun and games. Oh no. Deuce discovers that his former pimp T.J. (Eddie Griffin) has been framed for a string of man-whore murders plaguing the city. By working his particular mojo on a cast of grotesque European women--while butting heads with the prestigious European Union of Prosti-dudes (The Man-Whore Society)--it's up to Deuce to ferret out the real killer. Of course along the way he meets a lovely woman--wait. Do I have to go with this? It's really painful describing this utterly tasteless and humorless movie.

Apparently it took several years to coax Rob Schneider into playing Deuce again. He must have known playing someone as insanely stupid as a goofy-looking male gigolo is a mistake you should only make once. Incredulously the first Deuce Bigalow made $100 million worldwide but Schneider should have just kept holding out. But alas no. The actor succumbed to the power of persuasion and is now preparing to embarrass himself ALL over again. I have no sympathy. Nor do I have any sympathy for the rest of the cast who decided to include themselves in this mess. The endless stream of freakishly abnormal women notwithstanding funnyman Griffin--reprising his role as the "Man-dam " who steadfastly claims he is not gay--must have needed the money. Veteran character actor Jeroen Krabbe (Ocean's Twelve) as the Amsterdam police chief hot on T.J.'s trail was convinced to take the part by his teenage son. The thing is Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo is the kind of comedy that would appeal to teenage boys. Bathroom humor to the nth degree. But because of the R rating they won't even be able to see it unless they drag an adult kicking and screaming with them. Where's the logic in that?

OK so maybe the premise in the first Deuce Bigalow--a loser fish guy inadvertently becoming a gigolo--lends itself to some amusing situations. And maybe in the realm of insane possibilities the second Deuce's take on an elite international union of male prostitutes--who specialize in sexual techniques as the "Portuguese breakfast" or a "Turkish sno-cone"--could be considered humorous. But I'm REALLY stretching it here. Director Mike Bigelow (no relation--at least I hope so!) makes his feature film debut with Deuce 2 and would be best advised to wipe it immediately off his resume and start again. In truth these films seem to be an excuse for old pals Schneider and executive producer Adam Sandler to get together and come up with the most vulgar psychotic lunacy they can think of. And aren't we lucky they have the clout and money to get them made?

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