Grab your Valtrex and spray-tan, the first 13 minutes of the new season of Jersey Shore have hit the internet. The Shore gang is headed to Miami to escape this winter’s Snowmageddon, and is bringing enough hair gel to make the oil spill look like Snooki’s daily supply of bronzer. If you’re a glutton for punishment and poor life decisions, you can catch the whole premiere on July 29th on MTV. In the mean time, we leave you with the start of season 2 and the end of hundreds of years of proud Italian heritage.