Today’s Highs
Titanic 2: This Time It’s Personal
Finally, a movie sequel to look forward to. Io9 uncovered a Craigslist casting call today for Titanic 2: Mermaid Saviors, a sequel to the 1997 hit, in which the passengers of the Titanic are saved by futuristic mermaids and Jack Dawson is chosen as their king. Also there are mermaid pirates. Take a look at the text of the joke posting below, and keep the hope alive that James Cameron will choose to make this sequel over a 3D remake.
“Megamonolith Pictures is holding an open casting call for TITANIC 2: MERMAID SAVIORS, a sequel to the Academy Award-winning 1997 blockbuster TITANIC, on July 1st and 2nd. The film begins moments after the sinking of the Titanic. All who have drowned are brought back to life by a futuristic race of mermaids, called the Mantocks, who welcome the humans to their underwater paradise. Soon after, JACK DAWSON is elected king of the underwater humans. DAWSON requests that all humans be returned above water, a request that is denied by KING MANTROCK. The humans are slowly brainwashed into worshiping their mermaid saviors. Meanwhile, the sunken TITANIC has become a haunted underwater wasteland inhabited by RAGGARO and his band of mermaid pirates. Will the humans ever free themselves from their mermaid slavery? Will the mermaid pirates wage war on Mantock?
All actors seeking consideration must reply to this post with:
1.) A headshot
2.) A few short paragraphs on why they’re qualified for MERMAID SAVIORS.
Actors with mermaid and under water acting experience are highly desirable.”
This Week In The Obvious: Lady Gaga is Weird
The minute I saw this video I knew it was going on Highs and Lows, but I wasn’t sure as which. I’ve finally settled on ‘High’, and it’s not because of ‘Alejandro’ itself, which is very repetitive and could be an Ace of Base song. It’s because Lady Gaga isn’t a musician, she’s a performance artist, and a very entertaining one at that. I can’t make heads or tails of the video, but that really doesn’t matter, because hey! She has a gun bra! A bra with gun barrels sticking out the front! And underwear with a cross on it! So check out the video below, and keep in mind that it’s NSFW, unless your boss is into German leather fetish porn.
Today’s Lows
Charlie Sheen Needs To Shut The F**k Up
Charlie Sheen’s plea deal was delayed today after disagreements with the Pitkin County court. The deal would have allowed Sheen to serve a 30 day jail sentence with work release in exchange for pleading guilty to domestic abuse charges. It was called off, however, after Sheen objected to the terms of the actor’s work release in a local theater, which would prohibit the actor from smoking and require him to eat jail-provided meals.
I think Sheen needs to get some perspective. If a non-famous person had Sheen’s history of domestic abuse and parole violation, he would be spending years in jail. But Charlie Sheen used to be in 80’s movies, and is therefore above the law. Sheen’s lawyer, after rejecting the deal, said it wasn’t worth it to enter a deal that would “set [Sheen] up for failure.” Because it is absolutely impossible for Sheen to go a month without a smoke or a restaurant meal. Asking him to do that would almost be like punishing him.
