Liongate has released some of their press materials for this month's upcoming Comic-Con in San Diego, and guess what? Saw 7 is no longer being called Saw 7! No, Saw 7 (or VII for those who prefer Roman numerals) will now be called Saw 3D The Traps Come Alive.
I'm sorry, what?
First of all, each movie in the Saw franchise has been titled numerically, from Saw right through Saw 6, so why change the convention now? Did Lionsgate think we'd forget that this is the seventh Saw film in as many years?
Second, we as a people have got to stop putting '3D' in our movies' titles. It's tacky! What if The Wizard of Oz had been named The Wizard of Oz: Technicolor? That would sound pretty stupid, right?
Finally, 'The Traps Come Alive.' Was this the best subtitle the Saw people could come up with? It's like they threw that name into a hat along with Saw 3D Jigsaw's Revenge and Saw 3D The Final Chapter and picked at random. You know what would be better? Saw 7.
Unless, of course, the traps do indeed come alive. Then this rant would look pretty stupid. Perhaps the traps will become self-aware, like Skynet, and begin to self-replicate, like in The Matrix. God, that would be absolutely terrifying.
Excuse me, I have to go make a call to Lionsgate. I've got an idea for Saw 8.