Turns out, perfect man Bradley Cooper is actually a plagiarizing bastard. Well, at least that's the next character he plans on playing according to Variety. The actor has signed on to star in The Words, an upcoming film about an author who -- at the height of his literary fame -- finds out he must pay the price for stealing another writer's work, because, well, you really can't do that. The film will be directed by Tron: Legacy writers Brian Krugman and Lee Sternthal who, after doing their best to put theatergoers to sleep with that big, vapid middle section of Legacy, will take their first shot at directing. At least now they have one major safety net in case the movie sucks: these eyes.