We've got a week to go until the Charlie Sheen Roast hits television sets across the country, but the event itself went down this past weekend on Sept. 10 in Culver City, Calif. Lucky for us, Comedy Central released a few choice clips including Sheen's self-indulgent, raucous entry complete with a live soundtrack courtesy of Slash; a cringe-worthy comparison to another troubled star thanks to Roastmaster Seth MacFarlane; and a wealth of "whore" puns at the hands of Jeffrey Ross. This may be why our children are getting dumber. Of course, that doesn't mean we won't be watching this sure-fire spectacle on Sept. 19. It will be fine. We'll just drown our shame over the whole ordeal with some greasy chinese takeout and cheap beer. Shame plus more shame equals apathy and uncontrollable laughter with no time for remorse, which is basically the only way to make it through these Roasts. For now, you can munch on that egg roll you still have hiding in the back of your fridge from Saturday night. That should be enough to get you through these short previews.