S6E9: Well, we got our wish this episode: more Kim. Yet, somehow we’re already begging for less. After an embarrassing showing at the Sears event in San Francisco where all she could muster was “Um….hehe…I think you can definitely see…do I have to go on?” while Khloe has to pick up the slack and speak like a human, we find that Kim not only can’t dance, but won’t. At all, ever.
“I don’t dance.” –Kim
The Prince concert incident comes up – that time he pulled her up onstage and she wouldn’t dance so he kicked her off right after. And here’s the premise for the whole episode. Kim won’t dance. Not now, not never. But no one can let it rest, so Kim and Kourtney go to On Air With Ryan Seacrest – who produces the show; way to cross-promote, Seacrest – so of course, Seacrest brings up the Prince concert. Kim says she hated Dancing With The Stars and she would go backstage and cry and hope she’d get kicked off. She keeps saying she doesn’t want to embarrass herself, but really, isn’t refusing to dance like a human more embarrassing than dancing a little?
To fix this, she secretly takes a dance class that is somehow full of models and professional dancers hired to make her look extremely awkward – seriously, is it just me or do all of these people look like they came right out of Step Up? I don’t know if it’s true, but it sure seems that way. After a few mintues, she refuses to participate in the dance class, says she feels humiliated and leaves. DEAR GOD. The only thing that’s humiliating is the fact that she won’t even give it a try.
As a remedy, she has lunch with her friend and Prince’s ex-wife, so clearly they’ve been through the same pain. Right. She wonders how Kim can do red carpet and photo shoots but she can’t just dance in front of people. Kim insists, “I just don’t like it.” But I’m sorry, that just doesn’t make sense to me. Is she so worried about her public appearance that she can’t just shake her hips a little? Lord knows she got the shape for it.
Finally, they all go out for family dinner at an Armenian restaurant complete with belly dancers for no apparent reason, but of course the dancers request Kim dance with them. So finally, she gets up and dances like a paper doll. The music gets all hopefully and bouncy, but honestly, it’s hard to be excited for her when she’s just now discovered something that most of us figured out at age 2.
“Nobody calls you the Dapper Don Dissick.” –Kourtney
Kris is hard on Scott’s case this week and Scott doesn’t want to take it anymore. So when Kendall starts complaining about her mom and how she left her at her a photo shoot, Scott says he’s ready to usurp the throne as the family manager. He offers to manage Kylie and Kendall and they agree to do it as a joke because they think it would be good to put a little fear into Kris.
They wait until after Kris has her first glass of wine to tell her that they’re firing her and hiring Scott, but that can’t prevent all hell from breaking loose. While she’s unraveling, the best part of all of this is that Bruce actually agrees that Scott needs to manage the girls. While she stops dinner to call Scott, the girls tell Bruce it’s all a ruse to make Kris angry because she’s been neglecting them. Well this isn’t going to end well.
Kris goes over to Scott and Kourtney’s house early in the morning, so she can yell in Scott’s face and insult him in every possible way. She’s just been looking for a reason do this and even when Scott reveals that it’s a joke and that the girls complain that she’s not available enough and they wanted to get her attention, she doesn’t hear the important part. She skips right over the fact that her daughters feel neglected and instead takes it as an opportunity to take it personally and ream Scott for everything she thinks is wrong with him as a person. I may not be on the Scott Dissick train, but she’s flat out missing the point.
Scott says Kris can’t come over uninvited anymore, but Kourtney says no and that he needs to apologize. I guess I agree, but I wouldn’t want to apologize to Kris either. He really didn’t go about it the right way, but there is no logic when it comes to Kris. Because he’s not as dumb as he seems, he does the right thing. And as he’s trying to speak about his feelings, Kris is looking at him like a hyena, but this is the Kardashians, so of course they resolve everything and everyone’s hunky dory and hugging.
Alright, enough with this nonsense. Where’s this engagement already?