The only thing stranger than Simon Cowell's eraser-shaped head is the fact that he is currently dating Carmen Electra. The X Factor judge confirmed to Ryan Seacrest during his radio show that Electra (who has a long dating history of "Say what now?" men that includes Dennis Rodman and Dave Navarro) is not his "girlfriend" but they do "date." While Electra, 40, has had a more notorious love life, Cowell, 53, is no stranger to unexpected couplings, either. The music mogul had a long-running on-and-off relationship with pop star Sinitta, which started when she was just 14. (He is nearly ten years her senior.)
While the Cowell and Electra (Cowlectra? Electrawell?) is one of the more bizarre pairings to come out of Hollywood in a while, the two join a long lineage of Tinsel Town odd couples. Check out some of the other duos that have made us all go "Hmmm...."
Mila Kunis and Macaulay Culkin
Sure, they were both former child stars, but that didn't make the pairing of bona fide beauty Mila Kunis and troubled tabloid regular Macaulay Culkin any less strange. Even more eyebrow-raising? The mismatched duo dated for over eight years. Mary-Kate Olsen and Olivier Sarkozy
Let's do some math: half of the Olsen twins is dating the half brother of former French president Nicolas Sarkozy, who is almost twice her age. It adds up to one incredibly creepy pairing that looks more like a kidnapping than a relationship.
Amber Tamblyn and David Cross
Before having the most hipsterrific wedding in the history of Hollywood, the Arrested Development funny man and the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants actress turned heads with their noticeably significant age gap and arguably different levels of attractiveness.
Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett
Like Carmen Electra (bet you didn't think we could compare Julia Roberts to Carmen Electra, did you?) the Oscar-winning actress has had an eclectic love life. But this was none more evident than when the beautiful movie star wed goofy looking (sorry!) country singer Lyle Lovett. The pair eventually split in 1995 after less than two years of marriage.
Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton
One could argue Jolie's strangest pairing was her Oscar date brother, but since we've scrubbed that image clean out of memory, we'll go with BBT. In the throws of her wild child, blood vile-wearing days, the gorgeous actress was married to the guy who became famous for saying "French fried potaters" for almost 3 years, during which time they apparently had a lot of sex and creeped everyone out.
Christina Hendricks and Geoffrey Arend
Totally shallow to think it, we know. We know.
Brigette Nielsen and Flavor Flav
Take your pick about what's weirdest about these exes: that they met on Flavor of Love, that they were actually kind of a cute couple, or that the clock-wearing rapper/reality star could reasonably be considered one of the action starlet's more normal conquests — as she also has been with Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Drew Barrymore and Tom Green
When Barrymore first got married she was practically still a child (she was 19 when she wed Jeremy Thomas in 1994), but her second marriage was to someone who behaved just like one. The lovely actress, who had made her transition into adorable pixie at this point, was married to MTV jokester/goon Tom Green for a year while the whole world kept waiting to find out if this was one of his pranks.
Lisa Marie Presley and Michael Jackson Musical worlds collided in the most bizarre, unsettling way imaginable when Elvis Presley's daughter married the King of Pop. Their infamous MTV Video Music Awards kiss was one for the ages.
Soon-Yi Previn and Woody Allen The odd Hollywood coupling that started and ends them all: Woody and Soon-Yi. The legendary director became romantically involved with the adopted daughter of his longtime partner Mia Farrow, who was 20 years his junior. It's still pretty creepy to think about, but at least it's given the Farrows some seriously delightful Twitter fodder.
[Photo credits: Josephine Santos/Pacific Coast News; Chris Polk/FilmMagic/Getty Images; James Devaney/WireImage/Getty Images; WENN; Jim Smeal/WireImage/Getty Images; Steve Granitz/WireImage/Getty Images; B. Dowling/Wenn; Jody Cortes/Wenn; WENN; Kevin Mazur/WireImage/Getty Images; WENN]
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Rumor has it that Ben Affleck is very strongly considering running for a seat in the Senate — specifically, the one John Kerry will (presumably) vacate when he (presumably) becomes Secretary of State.
While the thought of entrusting your representative democracy to the man who starred in Phantoms will take a little time to get used to, it's comforting to think that many other people who became famous for things other than government have embraced a second career in politics.
Come on, the Terminator spent eight years running the state of California, the most populous state in the U.S. Surely the man who gave us the thought-provoking historical drama/Oscar contender Argo wouldn't do much worse representing his home state.
Affleck has not officially denied reports, though it's hard to believe he'd want to leave his showbiz career at such a high, well-regarded point. (Other actors rumored to be turning to politics, like Alec Baldwin, have denied rumors outright.)
In Affleck's honor, here are a few pop culture figures who entered politics after successful careers in the public eye.
After winning a recall election in 2003 to replace California governor Gray Davis, Ahnold served one more term leading the third-largest state in the union before returning to what he might arguably do best: action movies.
Another actor-turned-director, Eastwood entered politics in the 1980s when he served as the non-partisan mayor of the California town Carmel from 1986 to 1988. After his notorious empty chair speech at the 2012 Republican National Convention, though, it's clear where his allegiances lie these days.
Ventura became a pro wrestler after his stint in the Navy during the Vietnam War. He ran for his first political office in the 90s, serving as mayor of Brooklyn Park, Minnesota from 1991 to 1995, and later the governor of Minnesota (1999-2003). He's now a visiting fellow at Harvard's JFK School of Government. Not too shabby!
McMahon and her husband, Vince, started the WWF (now the WWE). After serving as President and CEO of the professional wrestling organization, she has run unsuccessfully for two different Senate seats in Connecticut.
Talk about an overachiever — Bradley is not only a former professional basketball player, he's also a Rhodes Scholar, an Eagle Scout, an Olympic gold medalist, and a three-term Senator from New Jersey. He ran for president in 2000, but we all know how that turned out.
Another pro basketball player, Johnson is entering his second term as mayor of Sacramento, Calif.
The well-respected boxer ran for Congress in his native Philippines, where he has served since 2007. He's up for re-election in 2013.
After making a name for himself as a singer and actor, Bono became mayor of Palm Springs, Calif. in 1988. In 1994, he ran for Congress, where he served until his death in 1998. His wife, Mary, finished out his Congressional term.
Perhaps the most famous actor-turned-politician, Reagan was a film and television actor — and even president of the Screen Actors Guild — before he went into government. The two-term California governor also served two terms as President of the United States in the '80s.
You were first introduced to Duffy when he was a roommate on The Real World: Boston in 1997. His reality show past didn't seem to hurt when he became district attorney of Wisconsin in 2002, a post he left in 2010 to run for Congress. Duffy was recently re-elected to his second congressional term.
So, how would Affleck stack up against the likes of these men and women? Are any of your favorite pop culture politicians missing from the list?
Follow Jean on Twitter @hijean
[PHOTO CREDIT: Jose Luis Magana/AP Photo]
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Every once in a while you do something right and God gives you a little gift. Sometimes you find $20 on the street. Sometimes you meet someone new and exciting at a bar and you get to make out in a dark corner and get your genitals all in a kerfuffle. And sometimes, some great times God puts Porsha Williams Stewart down here on the earth and winds her up like a mechanical monkey and just let's her spin out of control for all of our amusement. Clang, clang, clang she says as she hobbles from one leg to the other banging her cymbals together and shaking that one bean in the empty head of hers. Yes, Porsha Williams Stewart is a gift from God. Not like her Grammy meant when she said it, but she still is because we are going to be endlessly amused by her.
But before we get to Porsha, we have to talk about the rest of the Real Carpetbaggers of Nifty Moving and Mini-Storage. Seriously, all these women do is move. Kim is moving, Kandi is moving, NeNe is jet setting around getting pedicures while sitting in some uncomfortable black crocodile wing chair. (As I declared last week, I am not discussing moving one bit, so sorry Kim and Kandi. I can't be bothered with you until you do something real.) Did that not look like the least romantic pedicure of all time? And her husband Gregg is sitting next to her writing love poems that he just made up on the spot. "I want a key to your door. Like I never had before." He says. Well, he's a poet, and he didn't even know it. "I want you to be my wife. And then you will shoot me with your rif-le." "When are we gonna get back together? Maybe April or September?" "Roses are red, NeNe is black. If I was Nickelodeon, you'd be my Gak." That is what Gregg's love poems sound like. Man, he wants NeNe back so bad, it probably has nothing to do with the fact that she's now back on national TV and making lots of money and totally rich, bitch. It probably has nothing to do with that at all.
Now that NeNe is all big and famous, she's just jet setting around the world. Now she's in New York for the NBC Upfronts so that she can go out to dinner with boring advertising execs and they can buy her drinks and she can pretends like she is generally interested in talking to so that Kraft Mac 'N' Cheeze will spend lots of money to shill their product during her new show. She's all hanging up there and Cynthia is also in New York for "modeling." I love that is her excuse. "Hey girl, what you doing in town?" "Oh, I just got some modeling. Then I'm gonna see a show and go to Uniqlo and maybe stop by the Meatball Shop. But mostly, I got some modeling." What?
Well, Cynthia decides that she is going to take NeNe on a "poor tour" of New York, because she never had to be a struggling model in New York back when "modeling" was a harder commodity to come by. (But not modeling glue, because that you can buy easy and is good for a cheap high. PS, kids, don't do drugs. Well, at least not modeling glue. And if you do want to do modeling glue, I'm just a tweet away. I'll tell you how you can score some real shit.) The "poor tour" consists of a subway ride, which NeNe has never done, and eating a New York street hot dog, which no one with a still-functioning digestive track has ever done.
I hate when people are like "reality shows are fake" because duh, but I hate when reality shows are so fake that they think that we're not going to even know that they're fake and not care. The "poor tour" consists of NeNe going two stops on the subway. Two stops! She went from 49th St and Seventh Avenue to 58th Street and Fifth Avenue. That is like a five minute walk. Maybe 10 if you're wearing spiked Louboutins like NeNe. And then, right when they get off the subway there is a hot dog vendor which makes sense because there are a million of these people right on the edges of Central Park. But their hot dog vendor was a pretty white lady. I have seen a million hot dog vendors in New York and not only have I never seen a white one, I have never seen a lady, and most of the non-white men that I've seen haven't been that good looking. Now, if their hot dog vendor was an Arab teenager, that I would believe. But no, it was a pretty white lady. This is not a real thing that happened. This is an urban myth like hailing a taxi and getting the Cash Cab (seriously producers vet that shit). There is a better chance of getting a pretty lady cab driver (there are like three) but there are precisely zero pretty lady hot dog vendors. I mean, imagine the harassment?
What else happened? Hmm. Oh, Phaedra, who I think is my favorite on this show, is making a work out tape with her husband Apollo and it's called "The Donkey Booty Ass Kicking Workout Vol. 1." It is so every woman out there can have a fat ass. Now, I'm sorry Phaedra, but don't most people say, "I'm going to start working out so I can get rid of my fat ass," not, you know, the opposite? Well, not to worry, because this isn't going to be a strenuous workout. It's going to be an easy work out so that no one has to sweat and send their hair into paroxysms of "afroism" as Phaedra says. She's going to get Kernya Moo-ah to produce it which, ha! Hahahahaha. Oh, hahaahahaha. Sorry, I'm going to laughing until Boxing Day. Wake me up on the 27th. Also she said her husband looked like "Arnold Schwarzenegger on bath salts" which is both hilarious and true and it makes me want to go out for coffee with Phaedra and make jokes and lean across the table and slap each other's hands after each one and then laugh so hard we're out of breath and then eat like 20 biscotti and go for an easy work out. If Phaedra says a fat ass is OK, I can get on board.
Phaedra and Kernya had lunch but, whatever, it was kind of boring. Kernya bellowed, "Barkeep! Barkeep!" at the bartender with a complete lack of irony which is the fastest way to get your ass perpetually ignored at every bar in the entire Milky Way (not the candy bar).
As boring as their lunch was, Kernya's lunch with Porshe Williams Stewart was so incredibly fascinating. I am obsessed with Porsha. She is just the right combination of entitled, pretty, stupid, privileged, and self-righteous that she makes for the best Housewives character. However, she is just this year's step sister. Yes, we all know the step sisters like Kim G on New Jersey and Brandi on Beverly Hills last year or the new defunct Marlow on this here Atlanta. These are the secondary characters who are around to get fights started but aren't given the privileged of having a tag line at the beginning. They probably get payed less too. Yes, like step sisters they're around for all the big events and the grievances but don't get called to lunch or anything. I usually hate the step sister, but I want to see as much of this Porsha as I can.
Porsha asks her big sister Kernya out to dinner ostensibly to ask her to be the celebrity at her fundraiser for her grandfather's charity to feed homeless children the Hosea Williams Foundation." Kernya as a celebrity draw at a fundraiser, which, ha! Hahahahaha. Oh, hahaahahaha. Sorry, I'm going to laughing until Presidents' Day. Wake me up in February. As soon as lunch starts Porsha asks Kernya if she's married and Kernya says no and Porsha tells her all about her husband, Carvell Stewart, who is a Cookie Puss that taught himself how to play football. The reason this is all Piggity P wants to talk about is because her marriage is about the only interesting thing about her. She's just one of those bland stupid girls that likes Sex and the City or Girlfriends and bags and shoes and purses and shopping and her friends and has no aspirations beyond consumption and putting glitter on things. And texting. That is all that Porsha's future holds. Maybe a few kids.
Now her rubbing the fact that she is young and wants to have a million babies and is married to hot young scoop of ice cream is just awesome. She can't see Kernya getting more and more angry as she just carries on and talks about her tiara and satchel for winning Miss USA (as if she can put all her pride in that satchel, which she pretty much does anyway).
Now it's time for Porsha's bday party fundraiser which, again, is a "Powerful Woman Party." This is like the murder mystery dinner party of 2012, because everyone seems to be having one. It's at Hosea William's house, which was one of the earliest brick McMansions in the ATL and she puts up a white tent next to it. We only see one shot of the house and the walls of it are decorated with giant checks like all Hosea Williams did was win celebrity golf tournaments or something. I bet Porsha thinks that's the most tasteful thing in the whole world, just having laughably huge notations of legal tender lining the stairway of your house. As a kid she and her sister would take the checks down and run outside and ring the doorbell and the other would answer and they would play Publisher's Clearing House and one would play Ed McMahon and give the other a giant check she just won and the winner would just jump up and down and scream her head off and run around the house and throw her body down on the ground and just hammer and clamor. But no one wanted to play Ed McMahon. Why do I have to play Ed McMahon? I was Ed last time. God!
So, Kernya shows up to the party with her friend Karnya. If Real Housewives of Atlanta ever does an Alice in Wonderland-themed episode, we have cast our Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Daa. As soon as she arrives Kernya is dissing the party – that it's too small, that the house is ghetto, that it smells like manure – and then Porsha gets on the microphone (never give a half-drunk girl or a drag queen a microphone, because no good will come of it) and announces to her 25 closest friends that Kernya Moo-ah is there and is a celebrity which, ha! Hahahahaha. Oh, hahaahahaha. Sorry, I'm going to laughing until Flag Day. Wake me up in June.
But then she says Kernya was Miss America, which she was not. She was Miss USA. The second black Miss USA, to be precise. This mistake gets Kernya all upset. I mean it's like if you have the heavyweight champion of the WCW at your party and say they're the heavyweight champion of the WWF. That's like a promotion. Take it, Kernya. Take the promotion.
Then Carvell comes out with a cake in the shape of a purse because, of course (it is also his sister). Then he gives her a Chanel purse for her birthday which she squeals over because also, of course. And then he donates $200,000 to her grandfather's charity because, I guess. Basically this wasn't a fundraiser it was just her man giving a charity a bunch of money and Porsha throwing herself a party for marrying well and so she could have that really cute purse cake she saw on Pinterest which was reblogged from ObnoxiousThingsGirlsLike.tumblr.com. This is why Porshe is amazing. She doesn't get any of it. She just doesn't understand. She sits there in her Herve Leger dress thinking that she's the black Kim Kardashian and has no idea the awful implications of that. In fact, if you told her she was the black Kim Kardashian she would be flattered. This is her idea of equality. This is why her grandfather marched on Washington with Dr. King, so that she could have a purse party in his back yard with Kernya Moo-ah.
Well, Ms. Kernya (who is nasty) is cold. She is freezing! And she complains. She picks at her kale salad and just bitches about how awful it is in the tent and how it should be made warmer. After all, she is the celebrity guest and she should be warm. She is pulling a bit of a power trip so that she can get some attention and Porsha doesn't bite. Kernya says she's going outside to warm up and her and Tweedle Daa sneak off to their car. While they're waiting, and bitching about how it lit-rally smells like doo-doo (I used "literally" correctly to comment on how people use "literally" incorrectly but I also hate subtlety). And what happens? Porshe comes out to check on her celebrity guest. She comes out to make sure Kernya Moo-ah is OK and not dissing her. That is awesome. She is more concerned with what Kernya is doing than her own party. Girl, stay above it. Don't mess with a basket case like Kernya.
So, Kernya says she's coming back, but she never does, so what happens? Porsha comes back again! The only thing worse than checking on this bitch once is checking on her twice, because the stink face you got the first time should have said it all. Yes, Porsha just wants to see if everyone is cool, and Porsha is like, "Um, why did you get up and leave in the middle of dinner? Your food is waiting!" This pisses off Kernya who starts with her crazy shade and tries to make it seem like the Miss USA/Miss America snub was some huge deal. It was kind of annoying, but Porsha can't even figure out the difference between a hat and an earring, so how do you think you can tell the difference between Miss USA and Miss America? Please.
They fight, which is awesome. Porsha says that Kernya doesn't care about starving children because she stormed out of a faux-ndraiser and Kernya is like, "You ghetto," because she doesn't have any real gripes and then Porsha kicks Kernya out and it was just a moment of amazement.
It was just two egos smacking into each other in the night, neither knowing exactly what was going on or why they were upset but that there was rage to be had. Porsha wobbled up the pock marked driveway up back to her party and Kernya and Tweedle Daa got into Kernya's big black car brought around by the valet. She settled into the seat and sped away, her head held high and her eyes dry. At the end of the road she stopped at an intersection and the warm night closed around them. She shut off the air conditioner and opened the window and felt the stickiness seep in through the window in a blast like an explosion. The stars littered the sky with their light that was billions of years old, wiser than all of us and Kernya started to cry. A deep nasty cry and after a moment hit the steering wheel, harder and harder each time, setting off the horn a few times in small bleats that were enveloped by the humidity. Then she just kept on crying.
"Are you OK?" Tweedle Daa said. "It's not my fault," Kernya replied. "It's never my fault."
Follow Brian Moylan on Twitter @BrianJMoylan
[Photo Credit: Bravo]
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These days, the idea of a celebrity becoming the leader of the free world is something laughable. Can you imagine, a movie star (let alone a reality star) in the White House? Pshaw! But, it seems everybody wants to put their hat into the political ring these days, so perhaps one day soon we'll have another actor in the Oval Office to join Ronald Reagan's lonely little club of celebrities-turned-Presidents.
As we close in on what feels like the most intense presidential election season to date, we thought to ourselves, "Hey, let's take a little break from all the vitrol, all the hatred and divisiveness and focus on something silly we can all agree on: Wouldn't it be funny of one of these people were our president?"
Because in the end, once the dust settles on this campaign season, we'll have to go back to agreeing on at least some things, so we can get back to all getting along (sort of) again. Why not start off with a little bit of light-hearted irreverence loosely based on the happenings of the past year (and then some!) of political strong-arming, right? Enter: the celebrities that would be president.
Yes, you heard that right: the following stars have actually expressed interest in running the most powerful nation in the world. What would their campaign slogan be? Who's their Paul Ryan, Joe Biden, or (gulp) Sarah Palin? What would they want to change about our fair nation? We decided to take a deeper look at their would-be campaigns, and lay it all out for you, the American people.
Oh yeah, and everybody? Vote!
Vice President: Sean Penn. Of all of Madonna's former flames and friends, Penn is undoubtedly the most political. With his dedication to the seemingly continual crises in Haiti, we imagine these two would put their differences aside for the greater good of America.
Campaign Slogan: Justify Your Vote. Love, votes — so often one and the same when you're a passionate politico. Madonna's slogan would be a hint of her pop star ways, but also speak to the bigger question of justifying a vote for the singing presidential candidate.
Presidential Platform: Madonna would be a wildly liberal and controversial candidate. She would campaign heavily on the promise of a constitutional amendment to make marriage legal for same-sex couples. Undoubtedly, her campaign ads would involve a freedom of religion, expression, artistic endeavors, and voguing.
President Nick Jonas
Vice President: Demi Lovato. You know, to pull in those lady votes.
Campaign Slogan: Make It Right. A slogan based on the title of one of his songs? Naturally, this is how the littlest, non-bonus Jonas would amp up the excitement of his campaign. By the time Jonas is old enough to run for president, his fans may have long-forgotten his boy band superstardom days. Always good to use a gentle reminder of your past glory days to gain some momentum!
Presidential Platform: Jonas would definitely be big on medical advancements and treatment, given his outspoken support for diabetes research. It therefore seems natural that Jonas would campaign on health care reform and investing money into scientific education and research. Additionally, Jonas would probably be really interested in reinvigorating the religiously-minded folks across the country (no, no one's forgotten about those purity rings, Nick). Whether it be religious freedom, or just used as a bit of a moral compass is yet to be seen.
President Pauly Shore
Vice President: While we'd typically choose Stephen Baldwin to complete this ticket (hello, Bio-Dome reunion!), we know that their politics (Baldwin is conservative, Shore is liberal) are quite different. Our second choice, Rob Schneider, has the same problem (they endorsed different candidates this season). So instead, we choose his Encino Man co-star, Brendan Fraser.
Campaign Slogan: Thinking About You. Shore has become notably more political in recent years, and in his special Pauly-tics, he discusses a desire to think about everyone else and make the US economy strong again. So instead of making the election road all about him, he'd instead make it all about you. Not a bad political move when you're a comedian most well-known for being The Weasel.
Presidential Platform: Legalization of marijuana, possibly other drugs. He would create a new cabinet position: The Secretary of Hilarity, to make sure that the US keeps its sense of humor (even if it's a really, really lowbrow one) above all else in trying times.
President Arnold Schwarzenegger
Vice President: Sylvester Stallone. If Arnold ever went from Governator to Presidenator, he would certainly need his Expendables co-star to beat up all the threats to American freedom.
Campaign Slogan: Don't Be A Girly-Man. It's always about being manly with this guy. Second string options include something about pumping and humping: the two greatest activities a man can do, according to Schwarzenegger. (I wonder how he'd do with the female vote.)
Presidential Platform: Schwarzenegger would certainly campaign on his run as California Governor, even if he wasn't all that popular. He would certainly campaign on a promise for more jobs and a better economy (Schwarzenegger has frequently been quoted as saying that "the public doesn't care about figures" when it comes to the economy, but does care about jobs). He'd be a very typical Republican candidate—minus all the push-ups and the budget for accidental suit shredding from his intense workout regime.
President Donald Trump
Vice President: Donald Trump. Because The Donald is a business man. He doesn't need a second in command. All America needs is him and his billions. And the fact that he believes he is the world's most famous human. Megalomania is always a good quality to have in a politician!
Campaign Slogan: Money Makes the World Work. And if you don't believe it, you're fired from America.
Presidential Platform: Since The Donald has actually already run for President in the past, and has been both a registered Democrat (in 2001) and now a Republican, he will no doubt run on a platform of bipartisanship. Sure, he hates our current president with every fiber of his being, but that's personal, not political. In 2007, Trump has been quoted as saying, "I'm very much independent in that way. I go for the person, not necessarily the party. I mean, I vote for Republicans and I vote for Democrats." The biggest issues for The Donald? Loopholes for the rich, Trickle-down economics, turn The Apprentice into a legal viewing requirement for all Americans, and a constitutional amendment to recognize corporations as human beings.
President Roseanne Barr
Vice President: Cindy Sheehan. Since the noted activist is already Barr's running mate in the 2012 election, might as well keep her on board.
Campaign Slogan: Seriously. Because even though she's a comedian, Barr takes her politics very seriously. She always has—haven't you seen an episode of Roseanne?
Presidential Platform: Being a member of the Peace and Freedom Party, Barr's political leanings are very liberal. She wants to end the war on drugs and, well, all wars. No more fighting! So no doubt the legalization of marijuana (and all drugs) will factor into her economic policies (look at all the tax options!). She might also make it a constitutional amendment to ban former husband Tom Arnold from the United States.
President Alec Baldwin
Vice President: This one is a toughie. Since Baldwin is incredibly serious about politics, we imagine he'd pick a real hard-line liberal to end up on his ticket. His dream would probably be someone as accomplished as Hilary Clinton, but we all know she's probably a shoo-in for frontrunner in the 2016 race. Instead I'd bet on Massachusetts congressman Barney Frank. Having an openly-gay VP candidate would cause just the right amount of hysteria on the right for Baldwin's liking, no doubt.
Campaign Slogan: We're Better Together. Given that Baldwin is an actor, he's probably also a bit of a people-pleaser. Hence the desire for everyone to come together under his line of thought.
Presidential Platform: Baldwin is all about the economy and the environment. He's traveled around discussing an anti-fracking documentary, so clean energy (real clean energy, not coal) would certainly be a platform point. As would the current deficit and tax reform. Baldwin wants to actually pay more taxes as a wealthy America. Which is certainly admirable.
President Will Smith
Vice President: Jeffrey Allen Townes, aka DJ Jazzy Jeff, obviously. Please.
Campaign Slogan: Let's Do This...Big Willie Style. Because let me tell you, Smith is nothing if not confident.
Presidential Platform: In an interview with UK's The Mail, Smith has already stated what he believes are the country's most important issues: "The basis of human sanity is physical survival, right? So I'd start with universal healthcare and shelter." Look out for his children to also get cabinet positions, or at least their own movies, tv shows, and concert specials about being the Freshest First Family in the White House.
Vice President: Oprah Winfrey. Because with their powers combined, they'd probably sweep the election.
Campaign Slogan: I Got 99 Problems But Electability Ain't One. No additional commentary necessary.
Presidential Platform: HOV lanes... for everyone! Terrible jokes aside, Jay-Z will probably campaign on the promise of solving the biggest problems facing America: the lack of accountability amongst the big pimpin' types in the US. There would no doubt be some sort of reform surrounding that. Picturing Beyoncé as FLOTUS might just make this election dream a reality for him. Blue Ivy would become the most popular name in the US, and Kanye West would be the Secretary of Swag.
Would you vote for any of these potential presidents? Think they're all a wash? Let us know in the comments!
[Photo Credit: WENN.com]
Follow Alicia on Twitter @alicialutes
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The image that surfaced yesterday was shocking. A celebrity walking across a Kmart parking lot in L.A. snapped by the paparazzi. She was wearing trendy layered T-shirts, tight jeans, and platforms higher than Lindsay Lohan at a glue-sniffing convention. Her hair was done, her lips were glossed, her sunglasses were on. All the tabloids were talking about her outfit and just how skinny she looks. Look at how much weight she's lost! Maybe there's an endorsement deal in her future? But this wasn't a pop star with a ridiculous YouTube video or a starlet with a new show coming out on the CW any minute now. This was Sarah Palin, a woman who just four years ago ran to be Vice President of the United States of America.
Sarah Palin is now nothing but a celebrity. With this picture, Sarah Palin transformed from a political figure to a popular one, and the move she made next only solidified that. Her next book wasn't going to be a follow up to Going Rogue, her political memoir about becoming the Governor of Alaska and running for the second biggest office in the country. No, she is writing a fitness and diet book. This is not what a politician does. She should be writing a policy tome or crusading for the causes she believes in. She should be stumping and fundraising and wearing conservative pant suits and Old Glory pins. Sarah Palin, meanwhile, goes to Dancing with the Stars to support her daughter, a celebrity in her own right. It appears as though the Palins are now closer to Kris Jenner and Kim Kardashian than Hillary and Chelsea Clinton. Palin even had a reality show of her own. She appears on Fox News to comment on political issues, but she doesn't do it as an elected official anymore. Her visits to cable news are the same as when Ben Affleck shows up on Real Time with Bill Maher to push his liberal agenda.
At this point, George Clooney and Sean Penn, who have been aggressively lobbying for relief in Darfur and Haiti respectively, have more of a political agenda than Palin. She didn't move to DC to be closer to the seat of power, she moved to L.A., the other two-lettered town that is full of power — but the power of the entertainment industry and the celebrity industrial complex. She isn't running for office and she wasn't invited to the Republican National Convention this year. She didn't even attend.
This is odd because she came into our lives purely as a political figure. It wasn't like Ronald Reagan or Arnold Schwarzenegger who were famous first and then got into politics. Palin was plucked from obscurity up there in Alaska and thrust into the national consciousness. The immediate fascination with her had more to do with this narrative — the attractive female governor suddenly shoved into the spotlight — than anything of substance in her life. She brought with her a life like a reality show; her teenage daughter was pregnant out of wedlock to a no-good man who wanted to pose for Playgirl magazine and her husband was still trying to shake the specter of Troopergate. Then came Tina Fey and her impression that brought the candidate off of the convention stage and into the pop cultural arena.
Once Palin and John McCain lost the election, it seemed like she would still be famous in the political sphere, as governor of Alaska. Then she quit. Then she wrote a book. Then she got the reality show, and now she's dithering around L.A. shopping a fitness book the day after her "skinny shots" hit the tabloid press.
This is a first. Sarah Palin is truly unique for being the first to use legitimate political clout and presidential politics to make herself into a B-list celebrity rather than the other way around. Her involvement with politics is as tangential now as any other celebrity's; she doesn't hold office and is more interested in pursuing gigs that will cultivate her fame and popularity than getting the voters to back her. Al Gore, after he lost his campaign, also took to the movies, but that was An Inconvenient Truth, a documentary about climate change, which has more to do with politics than whether or not Bristol will survive doing the Paso Doble this week.
Welcome to the brave new world, Sarah Palin, because you are officially a celebrity and we're not quite sure what to do with you. Should we continue to pretend like what you say about issues matters any more than a Real Housewife? Should we give you a show or an acting role? Are you ready to be the next Bachelorette? One thing is for sure though. If you ever do run again, someone is going to have to remind you of when the McCain campaign smeared Obama for being a celebrity. He wasn't even the one emailing his diet book plans to People magazine.
Follow Brian Moylan on Twitter @BrianJMoylan
[Photo Credit: Miguel/Rocstar/FameFlynet]
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Hey, you'd be smiling like that, too, if you earned an estimated $165 million from May 2011 to May 2012 and had a net worth in the ballpark of $2.5 billion. Forbes announced its annual Hollywood's Highest-Paid Women list and, once again, Oprah Winfrey has come out on top. And while it's no big surprise that "America's only African-American billionaire" is still earning the big bucks, it's impressive that the 58-year-old media mogul stayed atop over this particular year.
After ending her wildly successful syndicated show on ABC, Winfrey struggled to stay relevant as her OWN network floundered in the ratings. The magazine reports that Winfrey, who had to put the ax to The Rosie Show earlier this year, "has yet to take a salary at OWN, so her sources of revenue are now the shows she produces through her Harpo production company (like Dr. Phil and Rachael Ray), her satellite radio station and her magazine." Still, even that has been a struggle for the current Forbes 400 cover girl: back in April it was estimated by Publishers Information Bureau that O magazine was down 24.1 percent in ad pages from 2011.
Forbes predicts that if her business ventures continue to perform like this, Winfrey (who also topped their Highest-Paid Celebrity list for the fourth year in a row) won't come in at No. 1 next year. (If only she earned income from this gif!)
So which lady could take the reins come 2013? Believe it or not, Britney Spears. Yes, the X Factor judge may just be the ultimate comeback kid, as she ranked second on the list of Hollywood's Highest-Paid Women, earning an estimated $58 million thanks to touring, her fragrance line, and strong album sales. Still, Spears, and everyone else, would have some major catching up to do, as Winfrey still outperformed her financially by $107 million. Trailing Winfrey and Spears is singer Taylor Swift, who can set her face to perpetual stun, as she is the youngest woman on the list and brought in roughly $57 million from May 2011 to 2012 — enough to put her at No. 3. Talk show host Ellen DeGeneres came in at No. 4 with around $53 million, while pop star Rihanna tied her by earning the same amount thanks to her radio dominance over the past year. Rounding out the rest of the top 10 are Lady Gaga ($52 million), Jennifer Lopez ($52 million), Gisele Bundchen ($45 million), Katy Perry ($45 million), and Judge Judy Sheindlin ($45 million). Surprisingly and noticeably absent from the list: Kristen Stewart (who made Forbes' list of the Highest-paid Actresses in Hollywood back in June) Beyoncé, Adele, Miley Cyrus, and those ubiquitous Kardashians. [Photo credit: WENN.com]
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The action man has become intrinsically linked to the words "I'll be back" ever since he uttered them in the hit 1984 sci-fi film, and the line was recently voted the best movie catchphrase of all time in a poll by Sky's film streaming service Now TV.
However, Schwarzenegger has now revealed he wanted to change the line to make it sound more "rugged" and he argued his point with director Cameron.
In his new autobiography, Total Recall, he writes, "Our biggest disagreement was about 'I'll be back'. I was arguing for 'I will be back'. I felt that the line would sound more machine-like and menacing without the contraction.
"It's feminine when you say the I'll, I complained, repeating it for Jim so he could hear the problem. 'I'll I'll I'll. It doesn't feel rugged to me.' He looked at me like I'd lost my mind. 'Let's stick with I'll,' he said. But I wasn't ready to let it go, and we went back and forth. Finally Jim yelled, 'Look, just trust me, OK? I don't tell you how to act, and you don't tell me how to write.'
"And we shot it as written in the script. The truth was that, even after all these years of speaking English, I still didn't understand contractions."
The action star's much-copied saying has been voted the most memorable movie line of all time in a poll by Sky's film streaming service Now TV.
Clark Gable's "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn" from Gone With The Wind comes in at number two with 16 per cent of the vote, while "Houston, we have a problem" from Apollo 13 is number three.
Other popular lines include "May the force be with you" from Star Wars, "Life is like a box of chocolates" from Forrest Gump, and Patrick Swayze's classic "Nobody puts Baby in a corner" from Dirty Dancing.
Everyone on the nightly news, the Internet, and, most importantly, your Twitter and Facebook accounts is talking about the Republican National Convention in Tampa. And after that, the Democrats do their dog and donkey show in Charlotte and the media takeover will start anew. It's all that's happening right now — but, still, it is boring. There, I said it. It's boring. It's worse than a lecture on oral hygiene that you had to sit through in fifth grade. Dull dull dull dull dull. And, even worse, we're going to have to relive some of these moments ad nauseum... and they won't get any more exciting.
Let's consider political conventions for a minute. They last for several days, create huge news, are full of thousands of rabid fans, and are relentlessly covered by the media, despite the fact that only a select portion of the population caring about them deeply. Looking at that description, it seems political conventions have their own entertainment-fueled cousin: Comic-Con! Both of these conventions share notable similarities with the one difference being that I care about one and not the other. So, what can the political conventions learn from Comic-Con to jazz things up a little? We're here to help, politics.
More Costumes: During the first few days of Comic-Con, entertainment websites across the Internet launch galleries of the crazy cos play people in their extremely elaborate Slave Princess Leia and Batman get-ups. Those fans definitely garner attention, so why not dress up a little bit, delegates? (And I'm not talking dress shirts and pantsuits.) May we suggest that each delegate wear a costume based on where they're from? A farmer costume from Kansas, cowboy duds from Texas, a prep school uniform from Connecticut. (Just like Drop Dead Gorgeous!) Or maybe they should dress up like their favorite characters: George Washington, Betsy Ross, or every GOPers favorite, Ronald Reagan. C'mon, the tea party has embraced this — why can't every other party follow (bat)suit?
Celebrities: Yes, famous commentators from Rush Limbaugh to Rachel Maddow will be attending the conventions, as will the politically outspoken Clooneys and the Kelsey Grammers. Arnold Schwarzenegger used to get invited too and then blew it all with a scandal. ("I'll be back," apparently also applies to his attending future Republican conventions.) But let's get some other ones there just to glitz up the show. Just random ones. Oh look, there is Megan Fox talking policy with Dick Cheney. Can you believe that Tom Cruise and Jennifer Lopez are posing for pictures with Michelle Obama? Who knew that Ashton Kutcher is as tall as Mitt Romney? See how much fun that was, and it was fake!
Question and Answer Period: The one thing that separates Comic-Con panels from the conventions is that, when it comes to the former, the fans get the opportunity to converse with the big names. Fans get to grill writers, directors, producers, and actors about just how they're going to handle their favorite fictional properties. Why shouldn't the delegates be allowed the chance to ask Mitt Romney and Barack Obama some questions? Won't that add some spontaneity? These are going to be very hospitable audiences. If there was a time for the "town hall" format to flourish, this is it.
More Exciting Footage: At Comic-Con this year, fans were rewarded with footage of the new Hobbit movie. That's awesome. What are we going to get at the convention this year? A skit of Donald Trump telling Barack Obama, "You're fired." Snoozeville. If you're going to make some clips, at least make them as inventive and exciting as the shows at the Con.
Booth Babes: You know how on the floor of the convention there are all those little signs announcing each state? Why can't those be held up by girls or guys in skimpy outfits? Seriously, let's finally give back, candidates.
Endless Swag: The best part about Comic-Con? Free stuff! Attendees can pick up figurines, posters, autographs, and, of course, comic books for no charge. What do you get at the political conventions? A "Barack Obama Hope" pin? A foam Mitt Romney #1 Mitten with a finger pointing in the air? An American flag lapel pins? Sorry, conventions: We would prefer more creative swag like "Cabinet Trading Cards" or "Speaker of the House Masks."
Make Your Promises Come True: When producers announce they're prepping a remake at Comic-Con, fans will see said remake in theaters. When a director announces the star of a picture, said actor actually stars in the movie. When we see early footage from a TV show, said footage eventually ends up in the pilot. When we get promises of change, new programs, or promised bipartisanship at a political convention, it never really happens. Sure, release dates can change, but the movie eventually comes out. Maybe if we thought that the things we heard at this big shindig would actually come true, we'd be a little bit more invested in the outcome.
Follow Brian Moylan on Twitter @BrianJMoylan
[Photo Credit: AP Photo]
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The moviemaker stepped behind the camera to helm The Expendables 2 with a slew of Hollywood's most famous tough guys including Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude Van Damme and Bruce Willis.
Talk is turning to a possible third film, and West admits he will try to persuade the former James Bond star to get back in the acting game.
He tells Britain's Press Association, "I don't know who's left (to include in a third film). Sean Connery would be great to bring back from retirement. I don't know if he wants to do it, but I'd love to have Sean Connery."
West goes on to reveal the movie's big stars often found it difficult to share the screen with their Hollywood rivals, adding, "That was very interesting because they're not used to having shots quite so wide, because I had to fit in all these big stars and I wanted to shoot them all together instead of just lots of single shots.
"They weren't used to sharing the screen with so many other big stars, so that was tough for them sometimes. Also they're firing guns and having fights - they have to be careful of each other because they're not dealing with stunt men, they're dealing with other movie stars."