Almost a year has passed since the tragic end of the Jonas Brothers, yet we still can’t seem to accept the fact that this trio is no more. I mean, they’re brothers, right!? They can’t just break up! Since apparently they were serious about ending the band last October, does this make my autographed kickball that I won during the “Jonas Brothers World Tour 2009” more valuable? I was told there were only 40 others in the world, so it’s practically the equivalence of gold (just kidding.. I could never part with it). BUT on a happy note, we can expect a good year for Nick Jonas.
After releasing his new song and video “Chains,” he continues to post photos from rehearsals and our anticipation keeps building and building. We expect a list of tour dates in the near future, Nick!
In honor of all fangirls hearts still being broken, we’d like to take a moment of silence and remember the good times with Nick, Joe and Kevin:
When Nick stared out to the crowd and we all fell to our knees sobbing uncontrollably.
Then they would do cool tricks to keep us screaming our heads off.
Kevin was almost too flawless on J.O.N.A.S.
When the “Pom Poms” video came out and we all died a little when Nick got down with the groove.
Every interview they've ever done was better than the last. God, we just miss these faces.
This exact quote came out of our mouths. More than once. Maybe 15 times. Give or take 30.
This beautiful face. How can you not miss this beautiful face?
We miss when they would make the most random yet beautifully concepted videos in the world. Bounce... just bounce.
These darn boys and their shenanigans!
Nick playing drums was always a favorite of ours. So much in fact that we would record it and watch it a hundred times on the drive home.
Then their flawlessness was broadcasted for everyone to enjoy when they appeared on “Saturday Night Live."
Joe had some killer moves.
Basically, this was us. Except the entire wall was covered. And part of the ceiling. Okay, maybe majority of the ceiling.
Sometimes Nick smiled with his teeth and even kittens cried in awe.
As much as we loved Demi Lovato, no. Back off of our man.
Right back atchya Kev.
Farewell boys, it’s been a great ride.
We’re going to continue crying in a corner now and pray this is just the worst and longest joke to ever exist. After we watch the 3D Concert Experience and Camp Rock.
Actress Jennette Mccurdy has written a web series loosely based on her experience of growing up in the TV industry. The Sam & Cat star, 22, has been acting since the age of eight and found fame on teen TV series iCarly, which ran from 2007 until 2012. McCurdy reprised her character Sam in a spin-off alongside Ariana Grande last year (13), but it was cancelled after one series following rumours of a feud between McCurdy and show bosses.
The actress has now launched her own web series, titled What's Next For Sarah, which she has written, produced and starred in.
Sarah's story is loosely based on McCurdy's - the character found fame on a TV show and is now unsure what to do with her life.
McCurdy tells The Hollywood Reporter, "I wanted What's Next for Sarah to be a light-hearted call-out to some of the more absurd experiences I've faced growing up in the entertainment industry... My goal was to exaggerate some of the more classic Hollywood archetypes - the phony reporter, the insincere agent, the duplicitous casting director - and heighten them to a surreal extent that we can all laugh at...
"I saw What's Next for Sarah as a creative opportunity for me to try my hand at more behind-the-scenes aspects of entertainment and learn more about the production process as a whole."
Four episodes have been launched on the show's website.
Rita Ora has opened up about her no-show at last weekend's (10Aug14) Teen Choice Awards in Los Angeles, confirming reports suggesting her ex-boyfriend Calvin Harris refused to let her perform the love song they wrote together.
Ora was an anticipated performer at the ceremony, but DJ Harris, who owns the creative rights to I Will Never Let You Down, refused to approve the track at the last minute, and the R.I.P. singer was left with no option but to scrap her set.
Appearing on DJ Ryan Seacrest's radio show in L.A. on Tuesday (12Aug14), she explained, "For anybody who doesn't understand how it works, he wrote and produced the song, so he has to approve anything TV-wise... and he didn't approve the Teen Choice Awards. "I could have got told a few weeks earlier, you know. That would have been nice. It was a last minute change, but, you know what, it happens and we move on and move forward... It is what it is, man. You write a song with somebody, and I guess there's some stuff that comes with it... Everything happens for a reason, that's how I look at it."
Ora performed an unplugged acoustic set of the song on Seacrest's show and insisted that regardless of her ex's feelings about the tune, she still thinks it's a hit, adding, "It's basically a love song you can dance to. I wrote this with a really special person, and it was the first time I ever kind of opened my doors up for somebody I knew personally. So, this song was written out of love and... it was convenient for the time it was written."
"People move on and move forward, but the song still has the same message... It's still an amazing song. I don't want anybody to have, like, a dark cloud over this song."
Singer/actress Hilary Duff insists she is still in good spirits after her new single leaked online before its official unveiling.
The So Yesterday hitmaker is gearing up for her highly-anticipated comeback to the music scene and was slated to premiere her new track, All About You, on U.S. radio programme the Adam Bomb Show on Monday night (11Aug14).
However, eager fans got hold of the song before its official debut, and instead of becoming furious, Duff has taken the leak in stride. She took to Twitter.com to write, "Guess #AllAboutYou leaked... Dammit all! lol I am excited y'all are loving it! Don't forget to get your own tonight @iTunesMusic please."
Duff, who previewed a clip of the song while presenting at the Teen Choice Awards the evening before (10Aug14), is due to release her first studio album in seven years this autumn (14).
Universal Pictures via Everett Collection
The Teen Choice Awards have been throwing surfboards at the most popular things in teen pop culture for over a decade, and last night's ceremony continued the tradition with huge wins for films like The Fault in our Stars and Divergent. While the organization doesn't always lend to the most surprising list of winners, but there have been cases where shockingly good (and shockingly bad) things have walked away with the night's big prizes. Here is our list of the top five best and worst winners of the Teen Choice Awards.
Black SwanWho knew teens loved Darren Aronofsky? The soul-crushing drama Black Swan earned the director the well-deserved Teen Choice Award for Choice Drama, something even the Academy Awards failed to do that year. You can't surf an Oscar, so we'd say Mr. Aronofsky came out ahead.
Toy Story 3The Teen Choice awards rightly heralded Pixar's Toy Story 3 as the best animated film of 2010, presumably because it was impossible to vote for The Vampire Diaries in this category.
Jennifer Hudson for DreamgirlsActress and singer Jennifer Hudson was awarded the hallowed surfboard in 2007 for her theater-shaking performance in Dreamgirls. We're sure the gigantic, sea-worthy trophy enjoys a place of distinction right next to Hudson's Academy Award, which the actress won for the same performance.
The Sixth SenseBack in 2000, when director M. Night Shyamalan was being heralded as the next Spielberg (boy have things changed), the filmmaker netted the Teen Choice Award for Choice Drama for his spooky thriller, The Sixth Sense.
The Hunger Games: Catching FireThe second installment in the Hunger Games franchise winning the award for Choice sci-fi film has always been a foregone conclusion, given the film's audience, but The Hunger Games: Catching Fire is actually a fantastic science fiction film in its own right, and the best one to be released in 2013. The film would have won the award regardless of its quality, but a broken clock is right twice a day, and this time, it was on the money.
Taylor Lautner for AbductionResidual heat from the Twilight series is the only explanation we can fathom for Taylor Lautner winning anything for Abduction. Despite the fact that hardly anyone actually bothered to see the film (it only managed to gross $28 million domestically) and it was universally panned by critics (currently sitting pretty at a 4 percent on Rotten Tomatoes), the actor walked away with the Choice Action Star flotation device in 2011. The film also won the award for Choice Action Film over Mission Impossible: Ghost Protoc0l, but let's not even open up that can of worms.Rihanna for Battleship2012's Battleship didn't do Taylor Kitsch many favors, but it did net Rihanna an award for acting. The R&B mega-star took home the Choice Breakout Star award, even though her performance is almost exclusively made up of one line utterances and exclamations like "What happened?", "Ahhhhhhh!", and "You look like Colonel Sanders, actually." The even bigger crime was that Noomi Rapace was passed over in the same category.
Adam DeVine for Pitch PerfectNow there's nothing particularly awful or even wrong with Adam DeVine's smarmy performance in Pitch Perfect. In fact, we even sort of liked him in the movie. Unfortunately, DeVine earns a spot on this list for the sheer quality of talent he beat out for the Choice Villain award. Acting heavyweights Javier Bardem, Tom Hardy, and Ben Kingsley left the Teen Choice Awards empty handed in favor of DeVine.
Drake Bell for Superhero MovieThankfully, the string of awful spoof movies that ran rampant in the 2000s is finally over, but back in the craze's heyday, Drake Bell won the Choice Breakout Star award for Superhero Movie. Anyone that has seen more than one frame of Superhero Movie knows why that's a travesty.
Ashton Kutcher for KillersRemember that film with Ashton Kutcher and Katherine Heigl where Kutcher plays a secret assassin? No? Good.
Shailene Woodley's films The Fault In Our Stars and Divergent and boyband One Direction dominated the 2014 Teen Choice Awards on Sunday (10Aug14), each earning a slew of top honours.
The Fault In Our Stars claimed seven prizes, including Choice Movie: Drama, Choice Lip-lock and the Choice Movie Actress and Actor prizes for Woodley and her co-star Ansel Elgort, respectively, while the pals' other film together, Divergent, was named Choice Movie: Action/Adventure. As Woodley accepted her Choice Movie Actress title, she encouraged fans to just be themselves, saying, "The truest form of bravery and courage is to wake up every single day, and to be ourselves. You do you. I'm gonna do me."
Meanwhile, British/Irish boyband One Direction topped the music categories, landing eight surfboard prizes during the televised ceremony, including Choice Music Group, Choice Summer Tour for their ongoing Where We Are trek, Choice Love Song for You and I, and Choice Break-Up Song and Choice Single: Group for Story of My Life.
Pretty Little Liars was the main winner in the TV section, while it was also a big night for singer/actress Selena Gomez, who picked up the Ultimate Choice accolade for her career achievements. During her acceptance speech, Justin Bieber's on/off girlfriend gave a special shout-out to her fans for their unconditional support through the good times and the bad, saying, "I have to be honest, especially this month, I cannot thank you guys (enough), because you remind me, amidst all the stuff that we deal with personally, you remind me of what's important. And that's giving, and loving, and caring about each other. You guys make me better." The 22 year old also dedicated the award to her mother for being "the greatest human being in the world".
Performances at the Los Angeles prizegiving, co-hosted by Teen Wolf star Tyler Posey and Modern Family's Sarah Hyland, came from the likes of Demi Lovato, Rixton and Jason Derulo, while presenters included Jennifer Lopez, Taylor Swift, Ian Somerhalder and Kellan Lutz.
The main list of winners is:
Choice Movie: Action/Adventure - Divergent Choice Movie: Drama - The Fault In Our Stars
Choice Movie Actor: Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Josh Hutcherson, The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Choice Movie Actor: Drama - Ansel Elgort, The Fault In Our Stars
Choice Movie Actress: Drama - Shailene Woodley, The Fault In Our Stars
Choice Movie Actress: Action/Adventure - Shailene Woodley, Divergent
Choice Movie Actor: Comedy - Kevin Hart, Ride Along
Choice Movie Breakout Star: Ansel Elgort, The Fault In Our Stars and Divergent
Choice Scene Stealer: Nat Wolff, The Fault In Our Stars
Choice Lip-lock: Ansel Elgort and Shailene Woodley, The Fault In Our Stars
Choice Chemistry: Ansel Elgort, Nat Wolff and Shailene Woodley, The Fault In Our Stars
Choice Movie Villain: Donald Sutherland, The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Choice Comedian: Kevin Hart
Choice TV Actor: Drama - Ian Harding, Pretty Little Liars
Choice TV Actress: Drama - Lucy Hale, Pretty Little Liars
Choice TV Actress: Comedy - Lea Michele, Glee
Choice TV Actress: Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Nina Dobrev, The Vampire Diaries
Choice Summer TV Star: Male - Tyler Blackburn, Pretty Little Liars
Choice TV: Drama - Pretty Little Liars
Choice TV: Reality - Keeping Up With the Kardashians
Choice TV: Reality Personality - Female - Cat Deeley, So You Think You Can Dance
Choice TV Breakout Show: Faking It
Olay Fresh Effects Choice Breakout Star: Odeya Rush
Choice Male Artist - Jason Derulo
Choice Female Artist: Ariana Grande
Choice Song of the Summer: Really Don't Care, Demi Lovato
Choice Music Group: One Direction
Choice Breakout Group: 5 Seconds of Summer
Choice Group of the Summer: 5 Seconds of Summer
Choice Song: Female Artist - Problem, Ariana Grande featuring Iggy Azalea
Choice Single: Group - Story of My Life, One Direction
Choice Love Song: You and I, One Direction
Choice Break-Up Song: Story of My Life, One Direction
Choice Country Artist: Taylor Swift
Choice Male Hottie: One Direction
Social Media King: One Direction
Choice Twit: One Direction
Choice Summer Tour: Where We Are Tour, One Direction
Candie's Choice Style Icon: Zendaya
Ultimate Choice: Selena Gomez.
Teen Mom, Teen Mom 2, and its various spin-off specials are not new to controversies, and people the world over have found themselves raging at the young women on the show. Jenelle Evans of Teen Mom 2 has been on the receiving end of criticism for years now, but this latest episode shows us another troubling side to the young mother of two.
In Season Five, episode 17 ("Harder Than It Looks"), Evans loses her temper and furiously berates one of her husband's dogs after he has an accident. It was also clear the pets were in cages that were far too small for them. You can watch the full episode here, and the first incident takes place around the 16 minute mark, and again about 34 minutes in (that scene is particulary difficult to watch, as she gets so angry that she lets the dogs go completely).
Evans has since released a video, apologizing for her disturbing behavior:
“You know, when Nathan was in jail, and I was pregnant, and I had Jace, and it was a really hard time for me taking care of the dogs... So, I treated the dogs really badly, and I really wish that I didn’t.”
For pet lovers, her statement (which you can read in full here) may fall on deaf ears.
Getty Images/John Ricard
Now that they're done sailing on a boat, hugging it and quitting it, and doing the Creep, The Lonely Island boys are finally ready to tackle their biggest project yet: a feature film. The comedy group, made up of Jorma Taccone, Akiva Schaffer, and Golden Globe-winner Andy Samberg, is set to star in and produce a musical comedy for Universal (via Variety). Shaffer and Taccone will also be stepping behind the camera to co-direct the project, and Judd Apatow has also signed on as a producer. Thus far, no information about the project's plot or title have been released, but based on the three comedy albums and hundreds of Digital Shorts that the team has created over the past decade, it seems likely to contain plenty of celebrity cameos, hip hop influences and people's junk in inappropriate places. In fact, it wouldn't be much of a surprise if the group decided to look to their musical sketches for cinematic inspiration; after all, the trio has produced a great deal of ridiculous and memorable characters and more than enough absurd premises to provide the basis for a full-length film. We decided to take a look back at Lonely Island's 10 best sketches in order to see if we could predict who (and what) is most likely to appear in the upcoming movie. Something's got to work better than Hot Rod, right?
10) “YOLO” Like most of the group's sketches, “YOLO” relies on a one-joke premise: treating the phrase “YOLO” as a cautionary tale rather than a celebration of adventures. But it’s a great example of Lonely Island's ability to build on that one joke, moving slowly from “be careful” to “never leave your house” to a terrifying shot of them smiling gummy smiles after pulling out all of their teeth. It also happens to be an incredibly well-crafted pop song, which shows how far the group has come in terms of musicality. Could It Be a Movie? There might be enough in the premise in order to create a funny side character, but it’s hard to see how much further the guys would be able to take a joke that ends with them cowering toothless in a boarded-up house.
9) “Great Day” “Great Day” is a rapid-fire barrage of jokes, but what’s great about them is that they all build on each other to tell a complete story. From the first moments when the camera pans through Dennis’ dirty apartment, you already know that the actual song won’t be as upbeat and cheery as the background music. The juxtaposition between the Sesame Street nature of Dennis' adventure through the streets and what he’s actually singing makes it even funnier when he finally loses it and starts climbing trees and pretending he’s in the Matrix. Could It Be a Movie? Maybe not a full-length movie, but there’s probably enough tragedy and insanity in Dennis’ life to make an interesting short film.
The Lonely Island - Great Day from Mike Oxbig on Vimeo.
8) “3-Way (Golden Rule)” There’s a lot that goes into making “3-Way” such a solid sketch: the idea that these guys would do just about anything to hook up with a girl, the fact that it finally establishes them in a pre-cell phone era, the plethora of multi-colored outfits, the fact that Justin Timerlake’s character met their cutie at a Payless, and then the final reveal that they’re much more interested in each other than in the girl they came to see. It takes the original “D**k in a Box” joke to absurd new heights and throws in a bunch of tiny, subtle jokes to create a sketch that actually gets better the more you watch it. Could This Be a Movie? Are you kidding? We’d watch anything with Timberlake and Samberg’s R&B wannabes in it, and an epic tale about their love and the girl who came between them has great cinematic potential.
7) “Like a Boss” “Like a Boss” is another great example of The Lonely Island’s ability to turn a single joke into a chronicle of one man’s breakdown. However, it owes just as much to Seth Rogen, whose incredulous looks punctuate every unbelievable claim that Samberg makes perfectly. It kind of fall apart towards the end as the Boss’ actions escalate, but it’s that middle bit, where Samberg first starts to hint at how messed up he is and Rogen just starts to get uncomfortable, where this sketch truly shines. Could This Be a Movie? Probably not. The Lonely Island managed to do everything it possibly could with that one joke in two minutes, and any longer would probably ruin things.
The Lonely Island like a boss from lewroll21 on Vimeo.
6) “I’m on a Boat” Look, “I’m On a Boat” is a pretty dumb song as a whole, but the lyrics are some of the finest Lonely Island has ever written. They’re generally simple – the chorus is just “I’m on a boat” repeated over and over again – but the verse slowly builds from the standard party rap song to rhyming about nautical-themed pashmina afghans in a way that’s truly clever and inventive. Simplistic enough to stick in your head, but complex enough to make you laugh, it’s no wonder it became one of their biggest hits. After all, when was the last time you managed to resist singing this song anytime you were in the same vicinity of a boat? Could This Be a Movie? Only if it’s about the love story between T-Pain and that mermaid; that’s what we really want to see more of.
5) “Space Olympics” Less a song than a sketch that happened to have been run through auto-tune, “Space Olympics” is a truly ridiculous, truly epic piece of work that’s most remarkable for the sheer world-building it does in the confines of three minutes. Sure, it’s mostly a joke about the dumb events that would make up a future Olympics, but the glimpses of a resource-lacking, poorly-run sporting event and the incompetent bureaucrat put in charge is a clever, well-crafted piece of satire. Could This Be a Movie? Definitely. We’d pay good money to see Samberg’s ridiculous ambassador attempt to rebuild the Space Olympics on his own. It’s true underdog story.
The Lonely Island - Space Olympics from Jeff Wiggles on Vimeo.
4) “Dear Sister” Anyone can parody a soapy teen drama like The O.C., but “Dear Sister” manages to take the single most ridiculous, shark-jumping moment in that show’s history and make it even more absurd and melodramatic. The close-ups, the music, the slow-mo – it all comes together to make a wonderfully surreal sketch that is just the right amount of dumb. Plus it contains what is perhaps the finest performance of Shia LaBeouf’s career. Could This Be a Movie? Unfortunately, no, but it would make for an incredibly dramatic climax.
3) “D**k in A Box” Perhaps the greatest use of a one-joke premise in The Lonely Island’s career, “D**k In a Box” is remarkably clever for a song about a dude gifting his junk for the holidays. But as hysterical as the facial hair and smooth falsettos are, the true highlight of the song is its two breakdowns. The ending where the gifting occasions slowly become more and more inappropriate is one of Lonely Island's best uses of escalation. But it’s the second verse, where the lyrics basically explain the whole joke of the song with slow jam earnestness, that’s the real triumph, as instead of killing the whole premise, it actually just heightens the ridiculousness of the situation. Could This Be a Movie? You mean someone’s not already making a film about these two idiots?
2) “Lazy Sunday” The Digital Sketch that kicked everything off, “Lazy Sunday” has everything that would eventually become The Lonely Island’s hallmarks: a simplistic premise, clever rhymes that tell a story about a slightly unusual character, plenty of pop culture references, a catchy, repetitive chorus, and old-school video effects. The jokes might be somewhat dated now, but the sketch as a whole holds up well. Even all these years later, it's a modern classic. Could This Be a Movie? It would be a relatively uneventful one... but sure, why not? We’d love to see The Lonely Island attempt a full-length character study.
1) “Mother Lover” Like Spider-Man 2 before it, “Mother Lover” proves that sometimes the sequel is, indeed, better than the original. Unlike “D**k in a Box” and “3-Way,” it immediately introduces a conflict into the situation (they need a last-minute Mother’s Day present) and reveal some important character backstory about the characters (they were raised by single moms who are lonely, and happen to like baths with chamomile) before reveling in the absurd solution they come up with. They might think it’s the second best idea that they’ve ever had, but thanks to the goofy lyrics, dramatic delivery and the way Susan Sarandon and Patricia Clarkson ham it up in increasingly dumb situations, it’s definitely the best sketch The Lonely Island has ever written. Could This Be a Movie? We’re ready to buy tickets the second they go on sale. Come on, Timberlake, this could finally make you a movie star. You know you want to make this movie.
Warner Bros via Everett Collection
Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling has revived the boy wizard's literary mentor, Professor Albus Dumbledore, to cheer up a teenage fan trying to come to terms with the death of her family last month (Jul14).
Cassidy Stay watched her angry former uncle Ron Haskell shoot and kill her parents and four siblings, played dead until he left the scene of the crime and then called police to identity her family's killer and alert them to the fact her grandparents were at risk. Thanks to the Texas 15-year-old's quick thinking, police officers were able to track down Haskell and arrest him before his killing spree over the whereabouts of his ex-wife, Cassidy's aunt, could continue.
Rowling learned about the story when Stay quoted Dumbledore at a press conference three days after the tragedy, when she bravely said, "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if one only remembers to turn on the light."
Sources now confirm that Rowling has sent Stay, who lost part of her finger in the shoot-out at her home in Houston, a personalised letter from Dumbledore, hand-written in purple ink, as well as a wand, an acceptance letter to Hogwarts (school) with a school supply list, and an autographed copy of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, the book from which Stay quoted at the press conference.
Rowling has yet to confirm she wrote and sent the letter.
Sure, Guardians of the Galaxy gave us an exciting, fun space adventure and a surprisingly moving relationship between a raccoon and a tree. But according to the Internet, the real gift is that of Chris Pratt: Movie Star.
He's everywhere right now — interviews, talk shows, movie theaters, television screens, .gif sets on Tumblr — all punctuated by the giddy exclamations of a nation head over heels in love. And why shouldn't America revel in the glory that is Pratt? He's goofy, charming, lovable, and humble, the funny guy next door wrapped up in an action-star package. But though this is the biggest wave of Chris Pratt adoration that we've experienced, it's hardly the first time that people have fallen in love with him. You might not realize it, but he's been breaking hearts for years now, thanks to his transition from teen crush to goofy best friend to supporting character to leading man. But is Chris Pratt as Star-Lord really better than all of these Chris Pratts, or did we miss the best Chris Pratt when we weren't paying attention? Let's take a look:
Doe-Eyed High School Boyfriend Chris Pratt (a la Everwood)The WB
This is the original iteration of Chris Pratt, and everyone knows the sequels are never as good as the original. That’s the face of a guy who is bound to grow into a movie star, but right now is going to make your teenage heart melt as the jerk-turned-dream-boyfriend. Have you seen his scenes with Hannah? When you were in high school, all you wanted was for someone to love you like that. All you still want is someone to love you like that. And look at that floppy hair – do any other Chris Pratt’s have that ridiculous hair? No they don’t. That’s why this is the best.
Everyone's Chubby Best Friend Chris Pratt (a la Parks and Recreation)NBC
We’re glad that people are finally waking up to Chris Pratt, but frankly, we feel a bit bad for them. See, they missed the best Chris Pratt of all: chubby, accident-prone, lovable doofus Chris Pratt. You want charm? He’s got it. A brilliant sense of humor? Check. Dashing good looks? Always there. A relationship with both his on and off-screen wives that will make you swoon? Still here. On top of all that, chubby Chris Pratt is the kind of guy who will happily sit on the couch with you to binge-watch Netflix, buy you Chipotle whenever you’re craving it and he won’t care at all about what you look like, because he loves you no matter what.
So Badass It's Scary Chris Pratt (a la Zero Dark Thirty)Columbia Pictures
Sure, Chris Pratt elitists can complain that earlier versions are superior, but the truth remains that ripped Chris Pratt is the best one of all. All of those amazing traits that the other Chris Pratt’s have – the humor, the humble perspective, the charm – are still here, but now they’re covered in the most incredible abs you’ve ever seen. Now he’s a serious actor. No more running into ambulances, he’s got serious business to take care of, and when he’s done, he’ll swoop you up into his toned, dramatic actor arms and carry you off into a terrorist-free sunset.
Space Cowboy Chris Pratt (a la Guardians of the Galaxy)Walt Disney Pictures/Marvel
There’s a reason everyone hopped on the Chris Pratt bandwagon after seeing him as Star-Lord: this is the best version of Chris Pratt. He’s cocky, he’s tough, he’s suave, he’s clever and he’s got a heart of gold and the coolest friends in the galaxy. He’s the best kind of action hero, the kind that has a wisecrack for every occasion and the sweet, sweet dance moves that are required in tense situations. Star-Lord is Han Solo for a new generation, the kind of character everyone wants to be and everyone wants to be with. It’s everything you love about the other Chris Pratts, plus a super cool fighter plane.
Moustachioed Chris Pratt in High-Waisted Pants (a la Her)Warner Bros. Pictures via Everett Collection
Sure, he only has a few minutes of screen-time, but those few minutes show off the best Chris Pratt we’ve seen yet. He’s sensitive enough to enjoy a well-written love letter, kind-hearted enough to accept his friend’s non-traditional relationship, funny enough to break the tension, attractive enough to pull off that mustache-and-pants combination and – best of all – emotionally stable enough to be in a relationship with an actual human being. Imagine the weekends in Catalina with him. Would any of those other Chris Pratts take you on a romantic trip to Catalina?
Chris Pratt: French Braider, Heart Breaker YouTube/Entertainment Tonight
Just when you thought Chris Pratt couldn’t get any better he goes and braids an intern’s hair. Not just any braid – a French braid. Most women we know can’t manage a decent French braid... and there Chris Pratt is, effortlessly plaiting her hair into an artfully-messy style that people would pay good money for in a salon. He does it all without breaking his concentration, answering questions just as easily as he would if he weren’t breaking the hearts of everyone watching. And then, just when it seems like you’ll finally be okay, he chastises the interviewer for attempting to tie it off with a rubber band, because this Chris Pratt is the best Chris Pratt.
Chris Pratt, Family Man WENN/Brian To
Chris Pratt is at his best when he’s with or talking about his family, by far. All of his insanity and goofiness fades away to showcase all of the affection he has for them, and there is nothing in this world better than a hot man who loves his family. Have you seen the way he looks at Anna Faris? That’s the dream right there. How about the way he talks about his son, Jack? It’s heartwarming and charming and adorable, while still allowing him the opportunity to make poop jokes. It’s the perfect combination of everything that makes Chris Pratt wonderful, with an extra helping of smiley, adorable baby and beautiful, talented wife. This, right here, is the dream.
Cast your vote for the best Chris Pratt of all below!