What do you imagine happens the moments after a serial killer admits to a lieutenant that he is, in fact, a serial killer? Probably a lot of handcuffing, Miranda Rights-reading, and general intense copy stuff, right? Well, if you’re admitting this to someone at Miami Metro (who, oh yeah, happens to be your kid sister), none of that happens! At all!
Tonight’s episode picks up right where the season premiere leaves off: Dexter has admitted to Debra (upon finding his stash of perpetual murder man trinkets) that he is a serial killer. And how does poor Deb react? Well, she punches Dex in the face and runs out of his apartment — he proceeds to run after her (which was probably pretty terrifying for Deb!) — and throw-up on the grass out front. Woops. Poor Deb. Homegirl has been through some s**t, y’all. She wants to understand why, but it’s hard for her to grasp the idea that her father could’ve molded Dexter into this sort of man. She believes, though, that she can help him: that all is not lost. She can change him! Oh honey, every girl thinks this, but can it really happen?
Batista and Quinn are still causing a ruckus at the Fox Hole (what a great name for a strip club, huh?), but the rest of the gang is working on a new case. It involves the fifteen year-old killing spree of Wayne Randall and his girlfriend. Seems as though the dude is feeling remorse and wants to help the cops unearth the remaining three bodies of his victims. While Dexter initially volunteers, Deb was all “oh hell to the no” and benches him. Masuka begrudgingly goes.
While initially it seems like things are back to normal, Deb takes Dexter aside and says she wants to help him: start a serial killer rehab for him in her own home. They’ll do everything together, and when he feels the urge to kill, Dexter must call Deb and talk to her about it. She wants to fix him by treating him like an addict (thanks to an old quote she read online from her former beau, Detective Lundy–remember him?). Dexter, obviously, hates the idea but what else can he do? He has to say yes or he’s getting arrested. This might get weird!
Meanwhile, LaGuerta has submitted the slide to a third-party lab to get confirmation on who’s blood was on that slide. The answer? Travis Marshall! (duh.) LaGuerta knows something is up, but she’s also completely petrified about the consequences of the fact that she’s pretty much unearthed that there’s another serial killer loose in Miami Metro and that poor Officer Doakes was framed. She calls the FBI and has the evidence from the case sent her way.
Quinn, ever the logical romantic, flirts with Nadia, a stripper, to try and get more information about Mike Anderson’s death. He manages to figure out the dead stripper’s boyfriend’s name, and from there unveils that she was with the recently-murdered-by-Dexter Viktor Baskov. This…ain’t gonna end well.
Next, we’re brought into the slumber party shenanigans of Deb and Dexter. She lays down the rules and makes some terrible (and terribly bloody-looking) pasta while she asks what it feels like when Dexter has an urge to kill. Slowly, Dexter is figuring out the rules to his “new code.”
And dead-dad is back, too! Did I mention that? He’s all mad at Dexter for telling Deb, and Dexter’s all “maybe you should’ve been a dad, dad!”
Dexter’s description of his ~dark passenger~ (I will hate that term forever) is creepy but also feels like exactly what a serial killer might feel/goes through. Creepy blood imagery is creepy, y’all!
NEXT: Wayne Randall and Those Pesky Ukrainian MobstersOne thing is certain: Dexter is not taking this Louis thing sitting down. So he plans to figure out a way to get into his house–figure out what in the what this dude is after.
But first! Dexter, desperate for a little bit of freedom, coerces Deb into sending him to the Wayne Randall investigation and he cozies up to the jailed killer. Dexter’s intrigued by this man’s willingness to talk to police. Why does he want to come clean now? Randall’s change of heart is thus: he says he surrendered to his conscious, leaving us with a shred of hope that Dexter might be saved. Even though he like, definitely should not be saved. Damn the attractive serial killer with a heart of gold trope! Gets me everytime! (Wait what?)
Lunch time! Instead of grabbing a sandwich or something though, Deter decides to take a bit out of his investigation of Creepy Louis’ motives. This takes him to Louis’ House of Oddities and Weirdness! There are toys! Dexter’s credit card numbers! And video rants! One including a diatribe about his hatred for Dexter. “No one f**ks with me!” Louis says in a sort of weird Valley Girl-esque way (why does everything end in a question?). Louis compares Dexter’s punishment to that of a one Bob Henley’s–a man who was convicted of being in possession of child pornography. Did Louis frame him? He is a huge computer nerd/engineer, so it seems likely. But Dexter doesn’t have time to ponder as Louis comes home and the two really battle it out. Louis is quick to flail around all “I am the most scared!” but later on when he shows up at Dexter’s apartment unfazed, we realized this dude is way, way more manipulative than we may have bargained for. It is ON, thinks Dexter. Me thinks this is going to probably end badly for both parties involved.
Deb is pissed when Dexter returns to the dig site, Randall and Dexter begin chatting again. Dexter wants to know what he meant by saying he “accepted his situation.” “The anger just fell off, like a bad scab. Left me open…try to make things right,” he explained.
The Ukranian mob story line (which so far, is highly uninteresting) continues. The Ukranian Mob Boss Guy (aka Isaak Sirko) is not pleased with the Fox Hole owner, George. He mentions something about a brotherhood, and he thinks someone might’ve killed Viktor. George says he has no idea and lucky for him, Isaak believes him.
Dexter and Deb go back to Dexter’s house to visit Harrison (WHY isn’t Dexter taking care of him? Also how is Jamie OK with becoming Harrison’s de-facto parent? Not cool, guys). Louis (who I am now upgrading to “psycho”) is all “hey BUDDY! Love hanging at your place! Right by the BAY so cool!” He’s not phased, and Dexter is pissed.
Nadia the stripper asks Quinn for a ride and, duh, gullible dude is gullible. While he thinks she’s going to want the sexytimes, she actually just wants him to pay for her broken transmission to pay her back for all the money she’s losing when the cops investigate the club. Ouch, dude! Forever alone, or whatever.
Over at Chez Deb, Dexter has put just a teensy bit (just enough to make her sleep hard for awhile!) of his magical murder serum into her steak so he can stake out Louis’ place. But! Even though he drugs him, he can’t go through with it. He calls Debra and admits that he wanted to kill someone but he couldn’t. GASP! Is this a sign of a sea change in our fair serial killer? A turn, perhaps. Debra thinks this is a sign that he can change. And it seems like maybe Dexter hopes she’s right. After Deb talks him down, he decides to not kill Louis and instead just leaves him out by the water (the bay of course!) to scare him.
Isaak, pissed off by the bouncer’s resignation (why is he so upset?), decides to show up at the bouncer’s house and confronts him about talking to the cops. Isaak isn’t so into this, so the only logical next step is, of course, to stab bouncer dude in the eye with a screwdriver until he’s dead. OUCH.
Unfortunately, all the hope we gained from Randall’s insight is squashed (pun intended) when he throws himself into oncoming traffic after admitting to Dexter that he lost everything when his girlfriend could only see him as a killer. To really drive home the point, Dexter gets a nice splatter of blood on his face from the unchanged Randall.
Seems as though life can’t be solved by sunshine and ice cream, as much as you sometimes wish it could.
What did you think of tonight’s episode of Dexter? Sound off in the comments!
[Photo Credit: Showtime]
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