How to Not Spoil ‘Game of Thrones’

Game of ThronesHBO

The Internet has changed the spoilers game. No longer can you just avoid that one know-it-all dude at the office who always spills the beans. All of social media, your morning commute and text messages are a veritable minefield of spoilers waiting to ruin your day.

Now that Games of Thrones has become the cultural monolith it is today, it’s even harder not to give things away if you’ve read the books or happened to be one of those people blessed with cable or access to HBO Go. With an ever-growing cast of characters, sub-plots and clans, the show does not always follow the book exactly in therein lies ample opportunity to reveal more than you bargained for. So in interest of keeping your friends and not acting like a smug GOT overlord, here are a few tips for all your GOT needs.

Avoid Leading Commentary

Group-watching popular TV shows is a fun, sociable activity that makes the episodes that much more enjoyable, until you spout off, “That’s going to bite him in the ass later!” If your couch were the courtroom, this would be called “leading the witness.” Being purposely vague is even worse: “So that’s how they’re going to play it,” and even an innocuous “Hmmm,” can get you in trouble. You don’t need to be tight-lipped about everything, but perhaps it’s time start your own screening night with fellow book enthusiasts.

Spare Your Social Media

Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither was your entire social media circle able to consume the latest episode. With the entire Thrones-loving public crashing and slowing down HBO GO every Sunday, there’s a good chance that not everyone got the latest gruesome death scene or flaying incident. News sites are the most guilty of this – because well – it’s their job to produce clickbait and instant recaps, but that doesn’t mean you have share it or create your own impaling GIF. Despite what Stephen King says, some people purposely avoid reading the books so they can still enjoy the twists, turns and surprises on the show.

Provide More Questions Than Answers

Despite being the spoiler-free, responsible, fantasy-fiction enthusiast that you are, there will always be people who want to get an idea of where the show is headed, against their better judgment. For every person who asks you, “What happens to the Starks,” simply respond, “What doesn’t happen to the Starks?” Or when they ask, “What’s the deal with that sociopath from the Misfits who has a fetish for torturing Mick Jagger? Tell them, Ramsay Snow is a special snowflake with daddy issues and time is a flat circle, and they’ll stop listening and divert their attention back to Cersei and Tywin Lannister vacationing together and making duck faces on Instagram.