The Least Normal Things About ‘The New Normal’: John Stamos Is Addicted to Love

John Stamos New Normal

NBC’s The New Normal is a delightful show about a not very ordinary gay couple trying to have a surrogate daughter with a strange woman who has an oddball child and an unbelievably bigoted (and funny) grandmother. NeNe Leakes is also somehow involved. As much as it would like us to believe that this is the way the world works today, like most Ryan Murphy shows it is a celebration of the oddities within all of us. Therefore this weekly feature is both a celebration (and indictment) of all the abnormality contained within it.

Normal: Being an Eagle Scout for life.
Abnormal: Any homosexual Eagle Scout who still hasn’t given up his honors.

Normal: “Jews are cheap” jokes.
Abnormal: “Jews are cheap” jokes that aren’t even funny.

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Normal: Making a joke about bears.
Abnormal: Making a joke about gay bears you have to explain to 10 year olds.

Normal: Wanting to do it with John Stamos.
Abnormal: John Stamos wanting to do it with you.

Normal: Keeping around clothes from when you were in high school.
Abnormal: Actually fitting into clothes that you had when you were in high school.

Normal: Needing help.
Abnormal: Going to Love Addiction Anonymous. That sh** is crazy.

Normal: Everyone falling in love with John Stamos.
Abnormal: John Stamos thinking that’s a problem.

Normal: Gay people taking baths together.
Abnormal: Those gay people not being lesbians.

Normal: A gay man wearing a Boy Scout uniform.
Abnormal: It is not Halloween.

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Normal: Kids waiting to play make believe.
Abnormal: No one wants to play Project Runway anymore. What is it? 2007?

Normal: Complimenting a woman on her shoes.
Abnormal: No straight man would talk about black suede Louboutin ankle boots.

Normal: Wanting to dress up when you go out into the wilderness.
Abnormal: Wearing a Margiela sweater when you go to the park to tell the Boy Scouts that you aren’t gay.

Normal: Thinking you don’t look sexy outside of your Boy Scout uniform.
Abnormal: Thinking you look sexy in a grey sweater where everyone can see your nipples sticking out.

Follow Brian Moylan on Twitter @BrianJMoylan

[Photo Credit: NBC]

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