‘New Girl’: Ranking The Flashback Episodes

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So New Girl  has had its second flashback episode (now it’s time to do an Alternate Universe/what if? episode!) How did the recent “Clavado En Un Bar” stack up against last season’s “Virgins?”


Well, I had high hopes when I saw the promo images of Winston’s whimsical leopard-dyed hair, but his basketball story didn’t quite deliver. It had trademark Winston-delusion (he called his career-ending injury a “decision”), but there’s no way it could beat the story of his tryst with Mysteria.

Clavado En Un Bar: 0, Virgins: 1


Schmidt started as a candy striper (or, as Nick lovingly referred to “a 300 pound wall of peppermint bark”), but realized volunteering wasn’t the way to get girls. So he began selling Christmas trees – and not long after, a Christmas tree mogul happened to die on his watch, and his last words? “You can take it with you.” Together, these two experiences lead Schmidt to become the materialistic man he is today.

A charmingly Schmidt-appropriate tale, but his lube disaster with Elizabeth had more panache (and quite a bit more physical comedy).

Clavado En Un Bar: 0, Virgins: 2


Coach had less of a story: he yelled advice from the sidelines of a basketball court so well that he earned his nickname. As he sagely puts it, “Sometimes, the call comes from inside the house.”

By default: Clavado En Un Bar: 1, Virgins: 2


We catch our first glimpse of Law School Nick: he transforms from Dreadlock Nick to Super Preppy Nick (preppy to the point that Schmidt compliments his scarf). Eventually, he finds himself studying at the bar – when the bartender literally falls asleep on the job, he realizes he’s found his calling.

This story’s got a twist, though: at the end of the episode, Nick reveals that he passed the bar exam, but became a bartender anyway. Interesting…what does this portend for Future Nick?

For that nugget of character development?  Clavado En Un Bar: 2, Virgins: 2


For some reason, her first job was at an ultra-ritzy day school (complete with blazers, horses, and “an ethnic gay bully”). On her first day, she bonds with an adorably picked on kid – a sweet story, until the gang finds that said adorable child is now wanted on 53 counts of embezzlement.

That said, her awkward feminist prom date/crying tryst at the park/deflowerment-via-hot-fireman wins.

Clavado En Un Bar: 2, Virgins: 3


We already know how she became a model, but we do get a completely adorable flashback of her as “Jess’ first student.” Oh, and she gets a career change – looks like she’s joining Nick at the bar.

Adorable children vs. Mick Jagger? Tie: Clavado En Un Bar: 2, Virgins 3

Winner: Virgins! “Clavado En Un Bar” was no slouch, though: it was one of the strongest episodes of the season (it certainly has one of the best Nick/Jess moments in recent memory) – maybe New Girl‘s in for a renaissance in this second half of its third season? Let’s hope so!