‘Shameless’ Recap: My Oldest Daughter


We pick up just where we left off last week – Frank and Carl bonding over bodily functions, Debs dating an older man, Fiona getting her feet wet in her new job and new relationship, Lip getting his ass handed to him at college, and Kev and V experiencing pregnancy drama. We’ll check in with Kev and V first.

Things are looking uncharacteristically good: Kev inherits the Alibi Room from Stan in a hilarious/horrifying (a combination that Shameless has always done to a T) scene involving Stan’s last will and testament and Stan’s “sniveling fagotty fag of a fagorama daughter” (Stan’s words not ours, we promise). Kev feels so guilty for inheriting over Stan’s son that he agrees to pay him $500/month for the next 2 years. Doable, right? Wrong. It turns out the Alibi Room brings in very little profit – and things get even worse when V realizes she’s carrying triplets: add that to Carol’s baby, and that makes four. What will they do? V seems dead serious when she says she wants Carol to get an abortion, but she has Carol and Kev against her on that one.

As for Fiona and her boss boyfriend? I smell trouble. There are already trust issues brewing – he’s bent out of shape because the night before, she said she would call and didn’t. She does her best to joke and flirt her way out of it, but he’s determined to talk things out – and things only get worse when a bout of road rage prompts an angry (and crazy) driver to take a baseball bat to her cherry company car’s windshield. Instead of telling the truth, she blithely tells Mike it must have been a fallen tree branch. Unfortunately, she’s already gone viral, and he catches her red-handed. Sure, honesty is important, but honesty in terms of your boyfriend and your boss are very different things, right? This episode we get a peek of what a dangerous line it is she toes between her personal and professional life. He’s really falling for her, and as such, he might just be the kind of ex-boyfriend/current boss to really make her life hell.

Debs is also experiencing some boy trouble – her boyfriend (remember him from last week?) invites her over to his place, and after a quick look in his wallet she quickly discovers two horrifying facts: one, he’s carrying around a condom, and two, he’s twenty. Twenty. She panics and tells him she’s only thirteen, but if he’s fazed he barely shows it – their date continues, as they hold hands on the couch. We don’t know what happens after that, but we do know that Debs stomps straight to her room after their date … uh oh.

Lip’s not doing so great either: his grades are still dismal, he gets almost no traction with the ladies (one exception – a shy-looking girl at the party who turns out to be decidedly not shy in the sack), his roommate’s girlfriend still shoots him dirty looks, and even his friends from his work in the cafeteria have families to get home to at the end of the day. Will he pull out of the nosedive, or are we going to see him crash and burn?

And speaking of crashing and burning: Carl and Frank continue to toe the line between sweet and disgusting (“he smells like a monkey cage” – again, Shameless in a nutshell). Frank’s liver failure has gotten even more dire (watching him squirt booze into his eyes this week is almost as horrifying as it was watching him retching and butt-chugging last week), so Carl makes it his mission to get him a new liver. A surprisingly patient nurse (another of Shameless‘ great guest stars) explains how the donor list works, and gives him at-home blood tests to see if any of the 18-and-up family members are a match. Lip’s a no-go, but Fiona? O positive, just like Frank. Needless to say, she refuses without batting an eye. Frank responds in kind, cool as a cucumber, as he informs them he’ll be asking his oldest daughter, Elizabeth. Mic drop. No but, seriously? What? Is it just me or does a long-lost daughter seem a little soapy for Shameless? I suppose if anyone would have secret, estranged children, it would be Frank, but still. The episode cliffhangs us, so I guess we’ll just have to wait until next week to see just who this Elizabeth is.