When another housekeeper gets frustrated and quits, Nick decides not to hire another one and instead forces the boys to learn to take care of themselves.
When the boys learn that their bookworm brother Sam is failing gym class, they razz him mercilessly.
Nick is upset when he discovers the boys have been using his firefighter uniforms to get free stuff from grateful neighbors.
Nick confronts the boys when he finds a pack of cigarettes in the house.
Jack manages to get permission and money for a car, but he ends up buying a motorcycle instead. As a result, Nick makes the boys watch a highway safety video.
Dissecting a frog inspires Chris for the Savage boys annual Halloween prank.
Jack convinces Sam to meet a new girl at the mall, but she would rather spend her time on her cell phone than with him.
The boys determine to go to the Carnival, each for their own reasons; Nick is skeptical about T.J.'s story about how the dog really did eat his homework.
The boys decide to set Nick up on an Internet date.
After Jimmy and Nick are called to a fire, the boys surprise them by making the Thanksgiving dinner on their own.
The boys accidentally knock their dad's prized baseball into the yard of an angry neighbor who refuses to give it back.
Kyle has a crush on Josie, but worries that having a girlfriend could threaten his masculinity; T.J. and the boys determine to knock all the tubes off the slopes by building a destructo-boggan.
The three older Savages think working in a lingerie store to earn money to buy their girlfriends Christmas gifts will be easy. But unfortunately, Sam quickly gets a promotion, which upsets Jack and Chris since they are forced to do all the work. T.J. and Evan are forced to work the fire department's annual toy drive.
The hottest girl in school invites Chris to a dance, but since she is part of the dance squad and he can't dance, Chris isn't sure what to do. Angela and Sam argue over their plans for the dance. Kyle and TJ drive Nick crazy while filming for their website.
Nick wants the city to open up a teen center so that his sons will have somewhere to go on Saturday nights. But he isn't pleased when his pushing to the center results in his supervising it.
When Old Lady Riley has a coronary on their doorstep, the boys administer their unique version of CPR.
Chris and Kyle start a food fight, and they drag Sam into it with them. As punishment, they all have to work a lunch shift in the cafeteria. Nick needs a babysitter for T.J. and hires April at Jack's suggestion, but Jack has other things in mind besides babysitting.
The boys plan on skipping Angela's grandmother's birthday celebration to watch the Superbowl, but when their cable goes out they see no reason not to do both at Angela's.
When Nick and Jimmy's uncle dies, they use the inheritance to buy a hot tub. But when the boys ignore the rules for the use, they land in hot water. Sam is dismayed to find that the gift Angela is giving him for their three month anniversary is much more expensive than what he was planning to give her.