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I HATE YOU, JONAS BROTHER!
Miley Cyrus hates Nick Jonas. Selena Gomez also hates Nick Jonas. Taylor Swift‘s vitriol, however, is directed at Joe Jonas, who evidently, dumped her for 10,000 B.C. actress Camilla Belle. Dang … for a bunch of virgins that may or may not be done with puberty, these boys have done some girls WRONG. OH, WHAT A SWEET 16 FOR MILEY CYRUS
Lots of girls suffer from multiple personalities before their 16th birthdays. Miley‘s keeping blond-wigged Hannah Montana but has rid herself of her stripper-like given name, Destiny Hope. She bared a naked back for Vanity Fair, sparked death rumors and regularly gets intimate with an underwear model. BRITNEY JEAN SPEARS, GET YOUR ASS IN HERE
Brit gets court-ordered around by her father. This inspires her to visit an old friend: the gym. Suddenly, she’s “getting her body back” and poised for a comeback. Her hair wasn’t growing back quick enough for Brit to curse “womanizer” 2,000 times over, but she sported a good weave on her 27th birthday. SNL’S “JIZZ IN MY PANTS” IS THE NEW “DICK IN THE BOX”
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NEW BABIES:
COOCHIE-COOCHIE- COO! BREAKOUT HOTTIE!
DAVID COOK |
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