Why We Loved It So Much: For 1992, Melrose Place was some wacky shiz. The older (committed) sister to Beverly Hills, 90210, it was a bunch of broads and bros living in a humble apartment complex — with the infamous pool in the courtyard — in West Hollywood, Calif. Our favorite story arc was definitely when Dr. Michael Mancini divorced Jane, got engaged to Kimberly, but took up a fling with Jane’s baby sister Sydney; a superdrunk Michael crashed his car, which sent Kimberly tumbling down a ravine, and Kimberly’s mother told everyone that her daughter was dead, which prompted Sydney to force Michael into marriage; but then Kimberly returns alive and well (except for the fact that she’s absolutely INSANE), gets Michael to come back to her, and in a moment alone, Kimberly stands in front of a mirror, takes off her redhead wig, revealing a long, nasty scar on her bald head and announces to all of us at home that she plans to seek vengeance and kill Michael. Yup, this was when we loved it.
Now, Not So Much: I mean … they’ve cast Ashlee Simpson. For the reboot. Two big things are wrong here: ASHLEE SIMPSON?! I’d sooner expect her on a episode of Cribs, sniffling about not getting the lead in the Gossip Girl spinoff whilst heating up some Hot Pockets for her boy-husband Pete Wentz. Second, the CW tried this already. And 90210 starring a harem of bony girls and a sad, sad Jennie Garth isn’t exactly lighting anybody’s fire. It was wrong to cast Ashlee. If they really wanted a Simpson, strangely, Jessica is far better suited for sex-capades and scandals involving an apartment-complex swimming pool.
