The next installment of “Survivor” airs tonight on CBS. Who will survive? While we don’t know, somebody out there does. The winner, after all, has already won. Given “Survivor’s” core ethics of unrestrained greed, how does the network expect to prevent the show’s presumably embittered dropouts from ratting out the surprise ending?
Here’s how: A CBS spokesman tells Hollywood.com that all “Survivor” participants signed confidentiality agreements that legally bind them from talking about the show.
And secondly, all contestants must field all of their press requests through the network before interviews can be granted.
With the above information in mind, our immediate reaction was to, of course, dial up the show’s first booted member — 63-year-old Sonja Christopher of Walnut Creek, Calif. — to see how much she would tell us.
And to the credit of the sexagenarian, she didn’t budge. (Note to CBS: Really, she didn’t.) What follows is the transcript of our (unsuccessful) attempt to pump a “Survivor” player for info:
Hollywood.com: “Hello, is this Sonja Christopher?”
Sonja Christopher: (with a touch of suspicion in her voice) “Yes, who’s this?”
H: “I’m with Hollywood.com, I just want, er, to talk to you about the CBS show ‘Survivor.'”
S.C.: (apologetically) “I’m sorry, but I can’t answer any questions. You’d have to talk to CBS first.”
H: “Oh, have you been getting a lot of, er, calls?”
S.C.: “Yes, and I am trying to get my number unlisted. But the phone company told me that it’ll take at least 24 hours.”
H: “That sucks. So what can, er, CBS do to you if you talk to me about the show?”
S.C.: “Well, (hesitation) they could sue me.”
H: “Right. So, er, does CBS pay you so that you don’t talk?”
S.C.: (firm but polite) “No.”
H: “OK. Do you get any, er, money for being on the show?
S.C.: “Well, we all do. Everyone on the show gets a certain amount depending on the length of their stay. I got the least amount ’cause I was the first person to leave.”
H: “Oh. OK. Er, thanks. Good luck with the phone thing.”
So there. As we’ve learned, the first “Survivor” nonsurvivor might not be able to build a fire or skin a rabbit, but she certainly knows how to keep her part of the bargain. For those who missed last week’s debut, “Survivor” is the Darwinist game show in which a group of 16 castaways are left to their own devices on a deserted island. Each week, the group’s weak link gets voted out. And the said process of elimination continues until the last person — aka the $1 million jackpot winner — emerges from the show’s 13-week run.
Oh, and we cannot stress this enough: To those “Survivor” contestants who haven’t already done so, make sure your phone number is unlisted.
