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Jeremy Piven’s Mother Wants Him to Be with Lindsay Lohan

Actor Jeremy Piven‘s mother has picked out a dream woman for her son–teen star Lindsay Lohan.

The 40-year-old screen star is still a bachelor and it’s starting to make his
mother anxious.

He says, “She’s an uncommon Jew. She can’t make kugel. She’s not one to have
her brisket in her hand and say, ‘Woe is me, why won’t my son get married?’ But
she is finally throwing hints.

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“I did [Jay Leno’s show] a few weeks ago, and my mom said, ‘Who was that
attractive woman sitting next to you, Jeremy? You made a stunning couple.’ I’m
like, ‘Mom, that’s Lindsay Lohan, and she’s 18.’ My mom’s a little out of the

“[A romance with Lohan] would be fantastic. She’s the ultimate shiksa
goddess, and she’s underage. But I prefer a curvier, more zaftig woman.”

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