Justin Timberlake Doesn’t Have Facebook: Late Last Night

Justin Timberlake told Jay Leno last night that he doesn’t have a Facebook account, and that he only recently figured out that he was able to purchase Jessica Biel because people can buy his songs on iTunes. So naturally, he’s the best possible person to play Sean Parker, Facebook’s first president who was fired over getting arrested for cocaine possession.

And Jane Lynch talked about being in a non-movie called Taxi Killers, and about her new nemesis (Coach Beiste) on Glee, who yes, is four inches taller than Sue, but isn’t armed with even half of Sue’s hair jokes.

Former President Bill Clinton told David Letterman about Chelsea’s wedding, and about how hard he and Hillary worked to make sure she turned out okay. He even talked about Chelsea’s new husband, who seems to have won the approval of Bill, which if were me, would mean I could have my recyclables picked up each and every day of the week instead of just on Wednesdays.

Julianna Margulies talked to Jimmy Fallon about pushing her way into the Governor’s Ball after the Emmys, and seeing Jimmy wasted on the plane back to New York.

Jon Stewart talked about how Christine O’Donnell’s win of the Senate nomination has sent Republicans scramming to reclaim the “soul” of the party. Karl Rove has come out as her biggest critic because he wants her to answer questions about her education and such, which he feels she is avoiding. But once he realized he was the only one voicing his disapproval of her, he sure quick fire challenged it and talked about how he endorses the Republican in everyone. Karl Rove, you look like the mole in the framed picture that my 10th grade Chemistry teacher had on his desk.

And Jon talked to Jimmy Carter about how much more obnoxious everyone is in politics these days. Let’s just put him on a two cent coin already.

And Stephen Colbert did his Tip of the Hat/Wag of the Finger segment about the Chilean miners who are trapped in a mine, the Portland Press Herald’s issued apology over a story about the end of Ramadan on 9/11, and a woman who says her virginity has allowed her to live to be 106 years old.