20 Lessons in Sass As Taught by Veronica Mars

Biting wit, stinging sarcasm, and whole lotta sass. Veronica Mars (Kristen Bell) was a tiny blonde with major ‘tude – the kind of girl you always want on your side. Whether she was tracking down perps or shutting down pervs, this modern day Nancy Drew always had the perfect retort. Fans know she was really just a marshmallow, but that doesn’t mean she wasn’t one of the toughest gals on TV. 

1. A well-timed insult is best for people who don’t know when to keep their mouths shut.

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2. A classy middle finger is the perfect way to shut down haters.

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3. When a guy underestimates you, treat it with sarcasm. 

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4. Make sure people know you’re not to be trifled with.

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5. When letting someone know how you feel about them, be as descriptive as possible.

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6. When your parents get nosy, you have permission to totally mess with them.

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7. Command respect wherever you go. How? By being a badass.

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8. If someone is bothering you, never hesitate to let them know.

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9. Keep headphones handy to block out annoying people.

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10. At your high school reunion, come prepared to deal with the obnoxious former popular kids.

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11. Sassy banter is effective for dealing with on-again off-again boyfriends.

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12. Make ominous threats with a smile on your face.

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13. Always play innocent when you’re accused of something naughty.

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14. It’s perfectly appropriate to throw a drink on someone who disses your favorite things.

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15. Sometimes you just can’t pretend to care.

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16. Ain’t nobody got time for stupid questions. 

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17. When making a joke, don’t miss a beat.

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18. Never miss an opportunity to take a sly jab at a someone you loathe. 

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19. Lie to get pesky dudes to leave you alone.

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20. And if all else fails, there’s always a stun gun.

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