Every week, Hollywood gives us something to whine about, and the week of June 24 was no different. We could make a drinking game out of this week, but that would be too dangerous. Instead, we’ll stick to the usual formula: varying levels of alcoholic respite depending on how bothersome the week’s issues are. Is your biggest complaint this week a flimsy one? How about a light cocktail to take the edge off? Got a real bone to pick with a celeb or entertainment entity this week? Go ahead, grab a drink that’ll put hair on your chest. Here are the week’s entertainment stories that are forcing us to seek a bubbly or boozy refuge. And maybe an idea or two about how you should wash them down.
LIGHTEN UP WITH A TEQUILA SUNRISE
Adele and Bon Jovi have banned their songs from karaoke. Rumour Has It that whoever allowed them to ruin karaoke forever is Wanted Dead Or Alive.
Game Of Thrones superfans are naming their children Khaleesi so that their daughter Arya isn’t the only one who has to face Earth’s version of the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros.
The creator and showrunner of MTV’s Awkward. upruptly quits her own show. Huh…well this really is awkward…
WASH THIS WEEK DOWN WITH A fUNKY MONKEY
Justin Bieber was banned from a skydiving facility for life, proving that “you can’t fly unless you let yourself fall” but you also can’t fly if you’re a douchebag.
An alternate ending to The Hills will air on MTV because these LC and co. weren’t annoying enough the first time around.
Miley Cyrus embarasses herself on Jimmy Kimmel Live and “We Can’t Stop” staring.
HIT THE HARDER STUFF WITH A LONG ISLAND ICED TEA
Paula Deen’s Today show appearance doesn’t help her cause, tempting us all to “pick up that rock, pick up that boulder” and hit her as hard as we can.
Chris Brown was accused of assaulting a woman in a nightclub. Or was he really just complimenting her on her dancing? After all, he once told us “the way you drop, drop” makes him wanna pop.
Jim Carrey suddenly withdraws from supporting his violent Kick Ass 2, paying tribute to his bipolar personalities in The Mask and Me, Myself & Irene.