TV STUFF: Kenny’s Dead!

No more cheesy poofs? Say it ain’t so! Word comes today from the New York Post that the creators of “South Park,” that flatulence-obsessed, toilet-minded (and really funny) cartoon, are seriously thinking about calling it quits. Trey Parker and Matt Stone are reportedly being courted by both NBC and Michael Ovitz’s ATG agency to produce a network show — and if that happens, you can say bye-bye to Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny and the gang.

Parker and Stone are under contract to make six more “South Park” episodes this year for Comedy Central. After that, they might well take flight and fry some bigger fish. The Post says the duo is being offered a budget in the $1 million-per-episode range for a network show, while Comedy Central affords them about $400,000 to $500,000 to make each “South Park.”

If only they’d won the Oscar for that “Blame Canada” song. …

FAMILY MATTERS: Barbra Streisand and Whoopi Goldberg will co-executive produce a lesbian-themed movie for the Lifetime network, today’s Variety reports. “What Makes a Family” is about a lesbian’s battle for custody of her late partner’s child.

LADY OF THE EVENING: Susan Lucci finally won a Daytime Emmy last year, after waiting for nearly two decades. This year she’ll show her thanks to the soap world by hosting the awards show May 19, according to today’s New York Post.

BACK HOME IN OHIO: Drew Carey will deliver the keynote speech at Cleveland State University’s commencement May 7. The Cleveland native is no neophyte when it comes to inspiring students: In 1996, he delivered the keynote address to dental graduates at Case Western Reserve University.