[IMG:L]We look back at the biggest, best and WTF-est of 2009 so far … because why wait till the end of the year?
Biggest News of the Half-Year: The King of Pop Dies at 50
Up until June 25, the decision here was quite easy: By entertainment-news standards, no story approached the magnitude and sheer longevity (the aftermath has lasted almost five months—and counting!) of the Rihanna–Chris Brown saga, which started way back in early February following an altercation that left the “Umbrella” singer with a facefull of bruises. It dominated the headlines, gossip blogs and message boards, and divided fans, celeb friends of the duo and, finally, the pop superstars themselves. But then, on June 25, the decision for this spot became infinitely easier when the world’s most famous musician, probably ever, died suddenly. It was a day that also saw the passing of Charlie’s Angels star Farrah Fawcett, which might explain to a certain degree why so many people are still saying that Michael Jackson’s death hasn’t yet sunk in. The details are still unfolding, and so are everybody’s feelings, but the “I’ll always remember where I was” news was the most colossal story in several years, let alone the first half of this one.
KEEP READING: ‘It’ Person of the Half-Year
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‘It’ Person: Megan Fox
What’s amazing about Megan Fox is, she hasn’t become Tinseltown’s star du jour by engaging in publicity-seeking behavior or inciting Internet rumor riots or even starring in movies (her lone film of the half-year, Transformers 2, only just came out). No, Megan Fox has catapulted so high and so quickly because she’s just that hot! With each Fox red-carpet appearance, websites and blogs simultaneously see a spike in traffic (and comments); guys want to be with her, and, well, so do many of their girlfriends. There is a sort of Fox-mania going on right now, and producers are hoping to strike while the iron is ridiculously, smoking hot: she has at least five movies coming out in the next couple of years.
KEEP READING: Most Surprisingly Great Movie
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Most Surprisingly Great Movie: Drag Me to Hell
Sam Raimi’s first foray into non-Spider-Man territory in almost a decade reminded us that, yes, this is the twisted horror maestro behind The Evil Dead who put his passion projects on hold to become a trillionaire. All selling out was forgiven and forgotten with the arrival of Hell, a landmark achievement in the slippery slope that is PG-13 horror (seriously, look up all the past failures). No movie in 2009 has been more fun, and no movie in several years has pulled off such an optimum laugh/scream ratio. All this from a flick that was on virtually no one’s radar heading into blockbuster season.
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WTF Moment #1: Joaquin Phoenix (Sorta) on Letterman
It’s been a crazy first half of 2009, and Joaquin Phoenix has carried the torch for much of it. Once considered the heir to the throne of the Daniel Day-Lewis school of Method acting, the Oscar nominee has quit movies and launched a rap career … unless, of course, he’s in the midst of his best performance yet (which is what most people believe). Real or staged, Phoenix’s Feb. 11 appearance on The Late Show—on which he was supposed to be promoting his “last movie,” Two Lovers, but instead wound up promoting his newly launched rap career—made for some of the most endlessly riveting TV in a very long time. Letterman, it must be said, deserves just as much credit for the hilarious/awkward segment, whether he was acting or merely responding viscerally to the inanity coming out of Phoenix’s mouth—you know, the opening in the center of that facial-hair forest.
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WTF Moment #2: Bruno and Eminem Go Face-to-Ass at the MTV Movie Awards
Sure, now we all know it was rehearsed, but on May 31, that immediately iconic image left our mouths agape for what seemed like an eternity—and Eminem’s Oscar-worthy performance afterward really left us questioning the incident at the time: Was that real?! Is it possible that Sacha Baron Cohen/Bruno just perpetrated the worst assault fathomable against a rapper, worse than physical assault, on live TV?! Should I feel badly for Eminem?! Or for Cohen, whose lifeless body will probably be discovered in a dumpster by night’s end?! Luckily, we didn’t have to answer any of those tough questions, but for a while, this was the biggest WTF moment imaginable (and one of MTV’s best PR stunts ever).
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WTF Moment #3: Artie Lange Sabotages Joe Buck and His Show
(NOTE: VIDEO ABOVE IS EXTREMELY EXPLICIT!) Because of the much lesser-known names involved and the fact that HBO initially wouldn’t allow the clip to be posted online, this incident has sailed under the radar—but make no mistake: It was real, it was extremely uncomfortable and it resulted in Lange being banned from HBO. OK?! Talk shows know what they’re getting into by booking Howard Stern Show regular Lange, which is to say vulgar, drug-related humor. But when the comedian appeared on the first-ever episode of Joe Buck Live on June 15, he managed to actually take it many steps further, taunting the sportscaster about his show and later lighting up a cigarette—which these days is about as taboo as killing someone on live TV. All this while SNLer Jason Sudeikis and Buck’s longtime friend Paul Rudd sat on either side of Lange, nervous chuckles the only reminder of their presence.
KEEP READING: If the Best Picture Oscar Was Handed Out Today …
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If the Oscars Were Handed Out Today … Best Picture: Up
Every phenomenal Pixar release awakens the debate: Does an animated film deserve Best Picture consideration? The answer should always be a resounding “yes,” and perhaps never more so than with Up. The movie has positively everything one could want from a trip to the multiplex, touching on all of our emotions and mesmerizing us with Pixar’s trademark stunning visuals. It also appeals to all age groups and, clearly, all critics. Hence, a (real) Best Pic nom could finally be in the cards, especially with the Academy recently increasing the nominee field to 10.
KEEP READING: If the Best Actor Oscar Was Handed Out Today …
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If the Oscars Were Handed Out Today … Best Actor: Jamie Foxx, The Soloist
Prior to The Soloist’s half-year delay (which really didn’t help the mediocre film any), Foxx’s umpteenth real-life portrayal was already generating Oscar buzz in 2008, and for good reason: Foxx mastered the complex nuances of Nathaniel Ayers—including his violin abilities—without turning the musical prodigy-turned-homeless man’s mental struggles into anything cartoonish. If the movie itself had been a little better and, yes, released during “Oscar season,” both Foxx and his co-star Robert Downey Jr. would probably be in line for Academy recognition.
KEEP READING: If the Best Actress Oscar Was Handed Out Today …
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If the Oscars Were Handed Out Today … Best Actress: Amy Adams, Sunshine Cleaning
Indeed, lead actresses in non-Bride Wars type of fare were in short supply during the first half, and Oscar nominee Adams was the best of the bunch, once again showing off her range with a turn both funny and poignant in the indie dramedy. Julia Roberts was a somewhat distant runner-up for her Duplicity performance—again, very small field.
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Falling Star: Eddie Murphy
Eddie Murphy must be pretty damned grateful for his role as Donkey in the billion-dollar Shrek franchise, because otherwise his career might be kaput or at least on hiatus right about now. The megabomb Imagine That makes two straight family-comedy duds for Murphy (the other being last summer’s equally awful and underperforming Meet Dave), and these aren’t movies made on a shoestring budget. It’s now abundantly clear that the actor must make a change (less money? more supporting roles? different genre?) to avoid a complete fall from grace. Of course, Murphy’s also got a pair of “Get Out of Movie Jail Free” cards in his back pocket: Shrek 4 and the long-rumored Beverly Hills Cop 4.
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Fallen Star: Lindsay Lohan
What’s worse than people not knowing what kind of trouble you’ll get into next? People not caring what kind of trouble you’ll get into next. That’s where Lindsay Lohan, who not long ago had the brightest future of any young Hollywood star, currently finds herself. The only time her acting career is even mentioned nowadays is to reference a role that could’ve been hers … or a movie (Labor Pains) of hers that’s been relegated to straight-to-DVD land … or when Megan Fox generously reminds people about Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen. But mostly the chatter revolves around Lohan’s off-screen (mis)adventures, while her career continues its steady decline. Sure, Hollywood loves a comeback story, but even if Lohan decides to embrace that ladder, there won’t exactly be a Robert Downey Jr.-esque exaltation waiting for her on the other side.
KEEP READING: Best Movie Posters
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Best Movie Posters: Friday the 13th and Whatever Works
Unlike the Friday the 13th remake, its poster is restrained, simple and scary as hell. That beat-up old hockey mask is enough to at least increase the heart rate, and it says it all—no tagline necessary. On the complete opposite end of the spectrum, Larry David’s Whatever Works gesture, too, says it all: “Eh, whattya want from me?” In fact, it sums up the Seinfeld/Curb Your Enthusiasm mastermind’s entire persona while also doing the Woody Allen movie justice.
KEEP READING: Box-Office Surprise — Times Three!
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Surprise, Surprise, Surprise at the Box Office: Paul Blart: Mall Cop, Fast & Furious and Taken
One begat a franchise, one revived a franchise and one just plain came out of nowhere—but all were equally surprising in their B.O. prowess. If the Kevin James-starring Blart had approached the $50 million mark, all involved would’ve been ecstatic; instead it almost tripled that once unrealistic amount. A sequel is now in the works, and justifiably so. Then came Fast & Furious, the risky and costly fourquel that could’ve been the nail in the coffin of not only the franchise but also for Vin Diesel’s career. Luckily for them, the movie grossed nearly $350 million worldwide, which essentially greenlit a fifth installment. Finally, there’s Taken, the biggest head-scratcher of ‘em all. With all due respect to Liam Neeson, the movie didn’t exactly have a blockbuster pedigree, but week after week it refused to die, and the end result was an astounding $144 million gross (over $220 million worldwide). The $30-$40 million range was probably the studio’s initial expectation. (And no, we didn’t forget about The Hangover, but it’s still in theaters—and very much raking in the dough.)
KEEP READING: Grading Conan’s Tonight Show
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Grading NBC’s Late-Night Carousel, Part I: The Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien
Conan’s getting better, but his first month as host of The Tonight Show has been rocky. In short, he has toned down his personality, most noticeably ditching the amped-up opening routine for a more subdued stroll out to center stage. It’s symbolic: The jokes have been broader, lazier and safer, and Conan has conceded some of his trademark silliness. Plus, the guests haven’t been as starry as expected, and the first-night lineup of Will Ferrell and Pearl Jam was a flat-out letdown (and c’mon, Conan, did Pearl Jam really merit a “Good Lord!”?). It won’t be long before the host and his extremely talented writing staff strike the perfect balance between the Average Joe-ness of Jay Leno and the offbeat sensibilities of Late Night-era Conan, but June certainly left something to be desired, and viewers seem to agree: The Tonight Show recently suffered its first ratings defeat at the hands of David Letterman’s Late Show since 2005. No pressure, Conan!
Grade: C+
KEEP READING: Grading Jimmy’s Late Night
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Grading NBC’s Late-Night Carousel, Part II: Late Night With Jimmy Fallon
To most everyone’s surprise, Fallon has been solid in his new gig and continues to get better. Could this possibly turn out to be (oxymoron alert!) a good decision by NBC?! Fallon’s first week was nothing short of horrendous, when he seemed utterly overmatched by A-list guests like Robert DeNiro. But ever since, he has found his footing and proven himself to be very likeable—even when a monologue joke falls flat, which is roughly 75 percent of the time. His strong suit isn’t laugh-out-loud comedy but rather a combination of energy (possibly even more so than that of his predecessor) and lack of pretension, but the fact that he’s also relatable—he’s enthusiastically embracing his digital-age viewers—gives NBC a one-of-a-kind late-night personality. And the Roots as Late Night’s house band is the icing on the cake.
Grade: B+
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Must-Own DVDs
Overall: Waltz With Bashir (released June 23)
We could play it safe by picking Slumdog Millionaire; we could play it even safer with Twilight. But literally almost everyone in the world has seen one, or both, of those. Enter Bashir, truly the best movie of 2008 even if it was snubbed by the Academy and pretty much everyone outside of the Angelika. The animated documentary (yes, you read that right), which pieces together the director’s lost memories of the Lebanese War, is uniquely entertaining and even suitable for showing off your home-theater setup. Sadly, though, a great antiwar film is still just what people need to see, and therein lies Bashir‘s real value.
TV Series: True Blood: Season 1 (released May 19)
Alan Ball’s rookie season of that other beloved vampire-book adaptation wasn’t quite perfect, but it was deliciously twisted fun on a weekly basis and continued (and still continues, in season 2) to get better. Plus, the DVD set has been available on the cheap pretty much ever since its release, giving it the nod over the pricier Lost season 1 Blu-ray set and the unnecessary Shield season 7 DVD (wait for the full series set—unless, of course, it’s the only season you’re missing).
Blu-ray: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (released May 5)
A lot of people seemed to loathe the Brad Pitt-starring Oscar nominee, and yes, it was, at its core, basically Forrest Gump with a slightly different gimmick (same screenwriter, uncoincidentally). But there’s no denying that Button is a sight to behold, which is where the Blu-ray version comes in. It’s so visually and technically dazzling that even the movie’s most ardent detractors might be willing to overlook the flaws once they go Blu.
KEEP READING: Best Music So Far
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Midyear Compilation Album
“My Girls,” by Animal Collective (from Merriweather Post Pavilion, pictured above): This song from the impossible-to-classify Collective (please don’t call them a jam band!) is likely to induce euphoria — much like the rest of Merriweather, the year’s best album thus far.
“All We Ask,” by Grizzly Bear (from Veckatimest): Multilayered and many-splendored Beach Boys-esque pop from an album whose greatness has only been surpassed by that of the aforementioned Merriweather Post Pavilion.
“1901,” by Phoenix (from Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix): If the Strokes hailed from Paris instead of NYC and were a lot better, this might’ve been their song.
“People Got a Lotta Nerve,” by Neko Case (from Middle Cyclone): Flawless alt-country from the sub-genre’s single greatest voice (sorry, Jeff Tweedy). The album cover is also the best of the year, by far.
“Eid Ma Clack Shaw,” by Bill Callahan (from Sometimes I Wish We Were an Eagle): One of Bill Callahan’s (formerly Smog) most accessible songs to date; also one of his best. Bonus points for the totally unexpected F-bomb midway through!
“The Hole Is Wide,” by Marissa Nadler (from Little Hells): Beautifully haunting piano non-pop—a necessary antidote to the plethora of disposable Gavin DeGraws out there.
“Auditorium,” by Mos Def (from The Ecstatic): Characteristically heady, transformative lyrics (and beats) from one of rap’s few geniuses … and legitimate actors!
“Use Somebody,” by Kings of Leon (from Only by the Night): Superb radio-ready rock that will soon become stale, thanks to its sudden ubiquity (the MTV Movie Awards? Really?). For now, though, it’s impossible to turn the song off.
“Actor Out of Work,” by St. Vincent (from Actor): Leslie Feist may have been temporarily supplanted by St. Vincent’s Annie Clark as the Queen of Indie Pop with gems like this from her quirky, sardonic and all-around awesome album.
“Divinations,” by Mastodon (from Crack the Skye): Last but, well yeah, least, a little metal courtesy of the Atlanta band to round out and crank up the list. Not for everyone, but also not so thrashy that it’ll poison the ears of casual rock fans.
KEEP READING: The Obligatory Spencer/Heidi Bashing
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The Should-Be Death of Reality TV: I’m a Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here — Or Really Just Speidi
The two-headed monster (and we mean monster!) comprised of Heidi and Spencer Pratt is creating a predicament for TV networks: They are deplorable, sure, but that deplorability equals ratings. Which is why you can expect reality TV’s—and let’s be honest, the world’s—most annoying couple to stick around for the foreseeable future. By being their attention-addicted selves on NBC’s recent, bar-lowering “reality-competition” show I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here, Speidi contributed ratings and immeasurable free publicity. That was followed by the equally buzzed-about Today Show interview with Al Roker, who essentially asked the Hills stars if they’re really A-holes or if they were merely acting like A-holes on I’m a Celebrity. Luckily, where there’s Speidi, there’s also Joel McHale (of E!’s The Soup), who’ll continue to deride them on a weekly basis … which is precisely what they want. Dammit, they’re like entertainment terrorists!
KEEP READING: Celebs Who Have Passed Away
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Celebituaries
Jan. 14: Ricardo Montalban (Fantasy Island), age 88, cause of death never officially identified
Jan. 27: John Updike (novelist), age 76, lung cancer
Feb. 6: James Whitmore (The Shawshank Redemption), age 87, lung cancer
March 15: Ron Silver (Reversal of Fortune), age 62, esophageal cancer
March 18: Natasha Richardson (Patty Hearst), age 45, skiing accident
April 12: Marilyn Chambers (adult film star), age 56, heart disease
April 25: Bea Arthur (Golden Girls), age 86, cancer
May 1: Danny Gans (Las Vegas entertainer), age 52, accidental drug overdose
May 4: Dom DeLuise (Cannonball Run), age 75, complications from diabetes and high blood pressure
June 3: David Carradine (Kung Fu), age 72, cause of death still under investigation
June 23: Ed McMahon (The Tonight Show), age 86, bone cancer
June 25: Farrah Fawcett (Charlie’s Angels), age 62, anal cancer
June 25: Michael Jackson (King of Pop), age 50, suspected cardiac arrest (autopsy results pending)
June 28: Billy Mays (TV pitchman), age 50, heart disease
KEEP READING: Predictions/Look-Ahead for the Second Half
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Predictions/Look-Ahead for the Second Half
Box-Office King and Queen: New Moon (Nov. 20) and Avatar (Dec. 18)
Biggest Box-Office Bomb: G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra (Aug. 7)
Destined to Be a Letdown: Inglourious Basterds (Aug. 21); The Wolfman (Nov. 6); Sherlock Holmes (Dec. 25)
Oscar Bait: Julia & Julia (Aug. 7); The Road (Oct. 16); Broken Embraces (Nov. 20); Nine (Nov. 25); The Lovely Bones (Dec. 11); Invictus (Dec. 11)
Can’t Arrive Soon Enough (Movies): It Might Get Loud (Aug. 14); Shutter Island (Oct. 2); Where the Wild Things Are (Oct. 16); The Fantastic Mr. Fox (Nov. 13)
Can’t Arrive Soon Enough (TV): The Jay Leno Show (Sept. 14, NBC); Flash Forward (Sept. 24, ABC); The Cleveland Show (Sept. 27, Fox); Community (Fall TBA, NBC); Modern Family (Fall TBA, ABC)
Can’t Arrive Soon Enough (Music): The Dead Weather, Horehound (July 14); The Fiery Furnaces, I’m Going Away (July 21); Circulatory System, Signal Morning (Aug. 4); Jay-Z, Blueprint 3 (Sept. 11); Beastie Boys, Hot Sauce Committee Part 1 (Sept. 15); Pearl Jam, Backspacer (Sept. 22); The Flaming Lips, Embryonic (Fall TBA)
Can’t Arrive Soon Enough (DVDs): Mad Men, Season 2 (July 14); Watchmen (July 21); Battlestar Galactica, the Complete Series (July 28); Flight of the Conchords, Season 2 (Aug. 4); The Office, Season 5 (Sept. 8); 30 Rock, Season 3 (Sept. 22); Lost, Season 5 (Dec. 8)
