Life can be tough, whether you’re dealing with a few “light treason” charges or getting used to your new hook hand. But no matter what your worries, there are little tricks you can use to make things run a little more smoothly. You can find some nifty tips most anywhere, but no family is more rich with life hacks than the Bluths. Yes, Arrested Development has plenty of lessons for dealing with your everyday qualms. Just check out a few below!
1) Have an embarrassing poster hanging up in your room? Worry not! Just cover it up with another, more socially acceptable piece of wall art! Sure, you can’t see the poster you really love, but at least you know it’s there!
2) Training for an exhausting physical competition and worried about your bodily functions! No reason to fret! Just pop a few Oxy-Incontinent pills and you’ll be fit as a fiddle for game day!
3) Constantly throwing parties to which nobody shows up? Forget about it! Just wrangle a few old dolls from the attic and have a pleasant — or invigoratingly contentious — group dinner!
4) Hoping to impress the apple of your eye but don’t have the time to get in shape? Don’t sweat it! Just stick a plush muscle suit beneath your knit polo shirts and you’ll convince everyone you’re truly buff!
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5) It’s your kid’s birthday but you don’t have time to run to the toy store? Forget about it! A ball of foil will do in a pinch!
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6) Have a big date tonight but don’t have anything planned? Put your fears to rest! A simple shopping cart race will impress anyone seeking a good time!
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7) Attending a big business conference and afraid you’ll come off unimpressive? Come on! Just keep reminding everyone how expensive your new suit is! And don’t worry about being consistent with the price, just so long as it’s high!
8) No idea how to get your kids to stop fighting? You’re looking at this all wrong! People will pay big money for video recordings of ad hoc grappling matches!
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9) Too many chores, too little time? Never you mind it! Just manipulate a needy, recently estranged family member or in-law into donning the role of a British nanny so he’ll be forced to do them all for you!
10) Has some pesky interloper stumbled upon a heap of financial felonies you may or may not (that’s for the jury to decide!) have commited? No biggie! Just knock him out at an elaborately staged bachelor party, make him believe he is guilty of murder, and you’re in the clear!
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11) Can’t afford lunch due to your criminal family’s recent bankruptcy? No problem! Parmesan cheese and mustard makes for some satisfying cuisine!
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12) For that matter, are you light on ingredients for a hearty dinner? Just grab a few old chicken bones or discarded meat chunks, throw ‘em in a pot with some broth and potato… baby, you’ve got a stew going… But you already knew that one.
