Obama: Party on, Joe.
Biden: Party on, Bo.
While Vice President Joe Biden and President Barack Obama were giving speeches about how to move our country forward during the final night of the Democratic National Convention in North Carolina, there were a few moments in which they evoked a great sense of national pride. There were moments in which they made promises for the future. There were a few egregious uses of the word “literally.” But there was also a very obvious strain of brotherly love. From what we could tell from last night’s speeches, Biden and Obama are basically the Batman and Robin of politics. They are absolutely BFFs.
How They Might Joke To Each Other After Addressing the Public With Dynamic Speeches:
As seen in Wayne’s World
Obama (in the words of Wayne Campbell): Well, that’s all the time we had for our speech. We hope you found it entertaining, whimsical and yet relevant, with an underlying revisionist conceit that bullied the speech’s emotional attachments to the subject matter.
Biden (in the words of Garth Algar): I just hoped you didn’t think it sucked.
How Biden Might Revive Obama When The Going Gets Tough:
As seen in Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Obama (in the words of Frodo Baggins): I can’t do this, Joe.
Biden (in the words of Sam Wise Gamgee): I know. It’s all wrong. By rights we shouldn’t even be here. But we are. It’s like in the great stories, Mr. President. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn’t want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. President, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn’t. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.
Obama: What are we holding onto, Joe?
Biden: That there’s some good in this world, Mr. President… and it’s worth fighting for.
What It Was Like The First Time They Hung Out Together
As seen on Community
Biden (in the words of Troy Barnes): Candy corn looks like tiny traffic cones.
Obama (in the words of Abed Nadir): Yeah, it sure does.
Biden: At, like, a candy traffic school.
Obama: Yeah.
Biden: Little ginger bread man is at the wheel, and he’s drunk.
Obama: Look out!
Biden: You keep driving, but you keep wanting to eat yourself.
Obama: All day.
Biden: That’s one of my biggest fears.
Obama: What is?
Biden: If I ever woke up as a donut…
Obama: You would eat yourself.
Biden: I wouldn’t even question it.
Obama: That’d be tasty.
Biden: It’s cool to know other people think about this stuff, too.
Obama: Yeah.
What Obama Might Say When Under Stress Due To a Decision That Upset The Public:
As seen in The Empire Strikes Back
Obama (in the words of Han Solo): Laugh it up, fuzzball!
What They Might Sing Together on Karaoke Night:
As seen on Scrubs
What They’ll Say When The Election Results Are In, No Matter What They Are:
As seen in I Love You, Man
Obama (in the words of Peter Klaven): I love you, man.
Biden (in the words of Sydney Fife): I love you, too, bud.
Obama: I love you, dude.
Biden: I love you, Bro Montana.
Obama: I love you, holmes.
Biden: I love you, Brobama.*
Obama: I love you, muchacha.
Biden: I love you, Tycho Brohe.
*Yeah, we know it was Broseph Goebbels in the movie. But to be fair, Biden’s a politician, so he’d be wise to leave that one out. Plus, admit it. Brobama totally works.
What They’ll Do When The Election Results Are In, No Matter What They Are:
As seen on Friends
Follow Kelsea on Twitter @KelseaStahler
[Photo Illustration by Hollywood.com; Photo Credit: Paramount Pictures; The White House (2)]
More:
Bill Clinton: Master of Improv
Joe Biden is Literally Chris Traeger (And He’s After Leslie Knope)
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