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‘How I Met Your Mother’ Recap: Garbage Island

S06E17: It’s a testament to How I Met Your Mother’s writers that they are still able to create these fairly complex narrative mysteries week after week as well as over the whole season. Take for example this week’s episode which was framed around some random day ten years in the future. Not-quite-as-future Ted (the return of grey Ted!) meets the waitress at a Hong Kong airport and they start the story. It seemed that the episode had nothing to do with this future event, which kept me wondering how it would all tie together, but lo and behold everything came together at the end. Not a bad episode HIMYM, not bad at all.

“I’m just saying that the eggs are already broken, lets make sure we get a pretty good omelet out of it.” – Zoey

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First: the big news! Zoey definitely isn’t the mother! I know we had all ruled her out (some a little more viciously than others), but I do believe this was the first in-canon mention of Zoey’s fate? Either way, we know for sure that Zoey won’t be procreating with Ted. Which means we’re once again spinning our wheels waiting for this ho to go. I mean, I like Zoey fine enough, but now that I know she isn’t the mother I’m bored with her. I know something will eventually happen, there is no mystery left, so there’s no suspense. Let’s just get it over with — dump her already! Or have her dump Ted! Either way, someone’s gotta get dumped!

Anyway, the main story is that Ted promised to pick up a box at Zoey’s old place. While there he runs into The Captain, who as it turns out, doesn’t know who Zoey ran away with. He keeps wanting to hang out with Ted for some bro commissary time and Ted is nervous as expected. Eventually after listening to The Captain’s miserable stories Ted thinks that he might actually be the bad guy in this story; but Zoey cheers him up saying they gotta make a good omelet since the eggs are already broken. Aww, that was sweet of Zoey. Too bad the bitch has got to go!

“You’ve been pork free so long you’re practically Kosher.” – Barney

Meanwhile, Marshall was once again still depressed about his dad. It seems to me that the writers are basically seeing how his dad’s death effects all of his character traits. Last week it was his man-boyishness and now we’re on to his guilt about not being an environmental lawyer. It’s a parade of depressing character traits! Yay! Look, I know losing a parent is a tragic thing and one of the worst aspects of growing up, but this is a really funny sitcom! I want to laugh! Now get back to being a giant funny man, Marshall! But seriously, sorry for your loss.

Marshall’s depression has also taken effect on Lily as well. Basically Momma ain’t gettin’ the lovin’ she’s used to gettin’. Lily realizes that Marshall is in a rough place, but still, a woman has got her needs that have to be fulfilled! She dresses up in negligee and quite literally throws herself at Marshall but Marshall’s depression runs deeper than that. Seriously, you know it’s bad when someone turns down Alyson Hannigan in lingerie. But since Marshall and Lily are perfect she is fairly willing to go dumpster diving (oh yeah, Marshall got really upset after watching this documentary about Trash Island and is now obsessed with cutting the plastic rings from six packs). That’s not exactly the dress of choice for me when I go dumpster diving, but I guess they have cleaner dumpsters than I’m used to.

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“She’s tiny so she’s allowed to push kids.” – Barney

Now for the rest of the gang: Barney really does like Nora! Oh snap, he might get another girlfriend! This is a pretty big deal, right? He’s only been smitten once before and that was with Robin, so this could be a big story coming up. And since I doubt they would repeat the exact same plot as they did when Robin and Barney dated, something serious could develop! Could Ted be the best man at Barney’s wedding when he meets the mother? After all, we never see Barney at the flash forward/backwards wedding. Perhaps he knocks Nora up. That could explain why Barney would marry her – after all considering that upcoming episodes feature his dad (played by John Lithgow) who never stuck around, he might want to be there for the kid. I really like this theory, I’m sticking to it.

But as for Robin? She’s basically been cast aside. There’s not much happening with her (at all), besides helping Barney. Perhaps the writers have something lined up for her later in the season, but man she has not been getting any good stories recently. However, she has still made her presence felt which I think is a great testament to Cobie Smulder’s acting. She can do a lot with a little. Hopefully she’ll be good in The Avengers and considering how much talent will be in that movie she’ll need all the help she can get to stand out.

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