Everybody and their mother (cough cough, Dina Lohan!) seems to have a reality show these days. But there are still plenty of fallen stars, celeb relatives, has-beens and quasi-famous train wrecks out there who haven’t yet been commissioned by E! or VH1 for an eponymous series. Read on for our list of who we think could and/or should pull a Denise Richards.
For millions of people, a Federline reality show would be represent the genre’s jackpot. For K-Fed, it’d be a chance to silence the critics once and for all–although, it must be said, there have been a lot less Federline skeptics ever since Britney Spears’ Head Shaving Seen ‘Round the World in February 2007. Still, a reality show would allow Federline to showcase his parental skills AND rapping skillz, all while supplementing his $20,000-a-month Britney allowance–I mean child support. [PAGEBREAK]
Despite a cinematic dry spell that dates back to last millennium, Stone remains inexplicably famous and in-demand, so she hasn’t quite reached the professional rock bottom that is a prerequisite for reality TV. However, the Basic Instinct actress should be desperate to repair her image following controversial comments she made in the wake of China’s devastating earthquake earlier this year. A reality show would give her the opportunity to show that she has no ill will towards the Chinese–or at least act like she doesn’t. [PAGEBREAK]
Haven’s sister is Angelina Jolie, whose name may ring a bell. There’s no reason to believe they’re not as close today as they were on Oscar night 2000–when they infamously locked lips for what amounted to an eternity in uncomfortable time–but if there’s ever a falling out between the two siblings, Angie (and Brad!) could be in trouble because Haven probably has enough dirt to secure a reality-show/unauthorized-biography package deal. [PAGEBREAK]
‘N Sync will probably never be getting back together unless Justin Timberlake finds himself feeling especially charitable some year down the road, so the question for Bass becomes: Is he content to live off his boy band’s fortune and royalties for the rest of his days–and is there enough money to do so? The answer, given his rumored participation in the upcoming season of Dancing with the Stars and general fraternizing with reality TV stars, would appear to be a resounding ‘no.’ [PAGEBREAK]
The indestructible Rolling Stones guitarist has given no indication that he needs money or would ever be game for reality TV, but there is an endless fascination with Richards and his magically still-beating heart. Plus, stranger things have happened, like fellow rock icon Ozzy Osbourne temporarily becoming the biggest reality TV star after The Osbournes hit the airwaves in 2002. [PAGEBREAK]
There’s a certain quality (or lack thereof) about Paul McCartney’s ex-wife that suggests she’s a mere dotted line away from signing up for reality TV–OK, that and maybe six figures. Mills is also the type of celebrity that people truly love to hate (except in England, where it’s just hate), which would make a prospective reality show addictive. Plus, she obviously has the pedigree: Fame-famished? Check. Dancing with the Stars stint? Check. High-profile divorce from a Beatle? Check. [PAGEBREAK]
A lot of people, including numerous Hollywood A-listers, are rooting for Snipes to make a movie comeback, but given his well-documented financial crises, a lucrative reality TV deal for the once-beloved action star would be tough to not at least mull over. Snipes, though, has led a fiercely private life outside of work all along, so don’t expect an about-face in the name of quick cash…unless he’s REALLY down in the dumps! [PAGEBREAK]
Jameson is at an interesting point in her life/career/legacy: She has–how to put this–conquered the porn industry and probably can live off royalties as comfortably as anyone, because, well, there will never be a shortage of puberty-stricken boys in this world. But (she claims) she has more to offer and is clearly eager to prove it; problem is, her porn past will likely preclude her from embarking on honorable endeavors, like movies that aren’t Zombie Strippers. But there’s always room for salaciousness on reality TV! [PAGEBREAK]
We would never advocate or condone breaking the law, but when your number of arrests in a year equals the amount of Jolie-Pitt kids (six), it becomes kinda impressive. That said, DMX has more or less sabotaged his reputation–or perhaps improved it, for those who judge a rapper by his rap sheet–and that probably doesn’t do justice to the real Earl Simmons. He needs a reality show a la Snoop Dogg’s Father Hood, which served as adequate damage control for Snoop following his arrests of ’06 and ’07 (although he was merely arrested three times). [PAGEBREAK]
It’s gotta be tough for a dad to watch his teenage daughter ascend to worldwide megastardom almost overnight–especially when that dad wants to BE his daughter! Billy Ray Cyrus probably isn’t (too) jealous of Miley, but he’s gone from being known as Billy Ray ‘One-Hit Wonder’ Cyrus to Billy Ray ‘Miley’s Dad’ Cyrus, which must seriously hurt the ego bone (and his “Achey Breaky Heart”). Why not just finally embrace it with a reality show that promises “appearances by Miley”? [PAGEBREAK]
Sarah Larson, you’ve just been dumped by the world’s most lusted-after bachelor–what will you do now? “Why, I’m gonna star in my own reality series on E! and spill the dirt on George Clooney!” would be everyone’s desired answer, but you get the feeling Larson’s too classy for that; if she wasn’t, she probably wouldn’t have managed to hold down Clooney for as long as she did. Still, dating the Oscar winner opened a lot of doors, even if said doors are more “Surreal Life” than “meaty film role.” [PAGEBREAK]
Chappelle would be one of the most unlikely reality TV participants/subjects in history, but he’d also be one of the most entertaining and fascinating. And if there’s one thing he showed by walking away from Chappelle’s Show and a rumored $50 million deal, it was that he’s completely unpredictable–so who knows? (Hey, a guy can dream, can’t he?!)
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